Opinions

April 7, 2008

Aimee Ouellette opinions @theotherpress.ca

Putting the “Men” back in menstruation

Aimee Ouellette

Opinions editor

a you ever had a chronic sinus infection? Or a cold that just wouldn’t go away? Or weeklong stomach flu? I'd like you to imagine, for a second, that these painful, annoying symptoms reappear every month, plus, not only are you mostly unable to make them cease, you are forbidden from even letting on that you are suffering from them. This is menstruation in a nutshell—half of the population, give or take, menstruate on and off for most of their lives. Why is it, then, that the mere mention of the word “period” elicits groans and looks of disgust from people who otherwise appear to be adults? Why are women forced through social pressure to censor a valid part of their experience?

Part of it is the fact that feminism simply hasn’t finished doing its job: lots of things that belong only to women are seen as unsavory and disgusting simply because of their feminine associations. Another possible aspect of our unwillingness to talk about periods is that we in North America have a weird

and unnecessary fear of the human body, but this is certainly not the sole reason for our lack of respect to a woman’s cycle: we may be squeamish about some body parts, sure, but generally only when they’re accompanied by two X chromosomes. I mean, when was the last time you heard someone refer to a boner? I bet it was only an hour ago—unless you’re currently watching the Comedy Channel or are living in a frat house, in which case it was probably five seconds ago.

I'm not saying that all men are ignorant of periods. This is certainly not the case. Men who have dated a fertile woman for longer than 21 days are generally at least somewhat up to speed on the process. Men who grew up with sisters, or a body-positive mother, are also likely to know what’s up down there. There are a lot of men, however, who feel that any discussion of menstruation within earshot is a vile affront on their (obviously fragile) masculinity. I don’t

know why people base traditional masculinity on the revulsion of all things feminine, but here we are.

Being an opinionated person (and also, frankly, someone who takes pleasure in making prudes uncomfortable), I’ve never been shy of discussing the human body, and that ™ goes for periods, too. The result of this is that all of my friends, male and female, are the type of people who aren’t easily made uncomfortable by “girl stuff.” After being around rational, feminist-minded people for so long, I had built myselfintoalittle bubble —_ where having a period is a-okay, and where casually mentioning it in mixed conversation (the same way you’d mention that you’ve been tired lately, or that your nose is running), is nothing to get upset about.

So it was quite a surprise to me when, during a creative writing workshop at Douglas College, I was given the “ewww treatment by a fellow student.

I read aloud a story I had written, and was waiting for feedback from the class. My story wasn’t about periods at all: it was actually about a close relative who was diagnosed with cancer and died at a young age. That close relative had been in the house when I got my first period, and had helped me through that big moment in my little-girl life.

My classmate’s response to my story, which was about death, sickness, and family ties, was “Did you have to tell us about your period?” As if his incredibly macho, masculine ears had been assaulted by the simple fact, the very mention, of my female biology.

Here’s a newsflash, guys: you came from inside a woman’s body, and childbirth is a helluva lot more sticky, slimy, and painful than menstruation. This means that during your very first moment as an independent person on this earth, you were absolutely covered in lady juices. Take this into consideration, and decide: are you really too good to hear about periods? Women are forced to hear all about male genitals and male sexuality every day, whether we want to or not, and very few of us have an attitude about it. When you make a gross- out face at the mention of a woman’s “yucky” body experience, you’re sending a message, and that message is that you only care about women’s bodies as a decoration, and not as the incredibly useful biological marvel they are.

Waiting for our perfect union

By Aimee Ouelette, Opinions Editor

Rie Barack Obama made a speech about race relations in America. It was called “A More Perfect Union,” and it was a stirring attempt to tackle racism without being hateful, bitter, or divisive. Pundits and journalists reported that Obama’s speech was both insightful and inspiring, and even The Daily Show’s Jon Stewart remarked

that finally, someone had “spoken to the American people as if they were adults.” After watching the speech, I was left wondering whether or not British Columbia needs such a_ politician; someone to tackle the undercurrent of racism that flows just beneath the surface of our very multicultural society. Certainly, Canada’s relationship with racism is very different than America’s—we have different histories,

different populations, and different attitudes. What we do share, however, is the butting heads of multicultural sensibility and the fearful racism of social conservatives. In America, however, this split seems to be largely geographical. Progressive multicultural communities thrive, but so do overwhelmingly racist ones. In British Columbia it is very different: our racial makeup as a population is much more balanced and is not as ghettoized as in many parts of the USA. Our “visible minorities” simply aren’t minorities anymore. If they are to be referred to as minorities, it is in a way that (as when the term “minority” is applied to women) is only culturally — and not statistically —correct.

Despite the fact that our society is much more integrated, and given that there is less history of slavery in Canada (although horrible conditions did, and sometimes still do, exist for minorities), residents of the Lower Mainland still encounter racism on a daily basis. Why, then? What are the conditions that cause such racism, and how can it be rooted out?

As I thought of all the past times I have heard racist accusations made on public transit, a pattern occurred to me, and I will suggest this pattern to

you for consideration. I believe that the vast majority of racist offence in the Lower Mainland is perpetrated by those of a different generation, a generation less likely to have been brought up in multicultural classrooms or with experience of interracial friendships and dating.

Although age often brings wisdom, many of our Canadian elders suffer from having been brought up in a time when multiculturalism was more of a talking point than a reality. I’m not sure what this means for anyone who wants to change the status quo immediately, but for the rest of us who are excited about one day living in a society when racism is more of a strange societal fringe then a strong undercurrent, it appears that all we have left to do is stay vigilant, and wait.

The next time any of you are insulted on the SkyTrain by an older person who is simply unable to stand the sight of you, consider telling them this: “You may think that I’m undeserving of your respect because of what I look like, and that saddens me. But the good news is that your racism will die with you—and I’m willing to wait it out.” Then make sure to smile prettily, because it isn’t nice to disrespect your elders.