Economics

A course which will show you real life applications of how to draw curves that mean absolutely nothing, even to ther economists. Proves itself as a seudo science by having its own anguage of gibberish rather than using ormal English words. Delves into

ow entire countries can fall into ereliction when one can of Cream of astodon soup goes up by [2.3 cents. Prerequisites: Must possess ability o hold in Jaughter*and be prepared to

hrow common sense out the window.

nglish .

his course focuses on making things p. Even if you do not see where DH awrence was having a conniption fit ith his pet alligator when he used nly three words in a sentence,

ou will learn how to make

hese things up. Focuses on

he great authors so you can

© out and become a

retentious, arrogant slob

t social gatherings by

nderstood anything by Margaret

Prerequisites: Ability to first pull xygen into lungs, then push it out.

un Class (coming soon) miscellaneous class that can involve nything that sounds remotely fun. his class embodies all the knowledge at you want to learn, and doesn’t clude any boring content. However, y the time the class is actually ailable, the teacher and program

air will have sucked all the fun out

of it, and it will be nothing like described here.

Prerequisites: None. Expect to have your hopes trashed.

Geology A weeding out course. A course offered to get rid of those with less than standard IQs because who in their right mind would sign up for a course to learn about rocks. Topics include: Yellow rocks. Pretty rocks. Black rocks. And a twenty page term paper on: “Grey Rocks: Useful or Antichrist incarnate?”

Prerequisites: Low self-esteem

Nutrition Studies

Course includes overview of how to

eat. Term paper on how many

McDonald's burgers one person would

have to eat to keep a trim figure like

John Candy. Other topics include

celery and the ever evil presence of pasta salad and its role in society.

Prerequisites: Must be able to find mouth with fork.

Philosophy Allows you to think for hours on end about things no other human being would think about (because they're too dull) and come to no specific conclusion, Also works to enhance social skills by fighting with other people just like you about things neither one of you have any idea about. In three way tie for world’s most useless degree.

Prerequisites: Must have no indi-

vidual thought patterns.

Political Science Focuses on the world of (poly—many tics—blood parasites). Other chapters Bribes, screwing the little to fight your way out of The new American sect ‘Denying everything while straight face’ Tied for w useless degree.

Prerequisites: Must h ve

Affair 400 and Spin Doct. EL

Print Futures

A pseudo journalism co

provides the basic skills to

widely published magazin : i

Ox Quarterly or Shoelaces o, f

Monthly or the Other Press. Prerequisites: Must hav

Grammar 231 and Spl C 100

Psychology é Provides a basis for learning the medical justification for all illnesses you think you hav ve . the three way tie for world’s most useless degree. x

Prerequisites: Hypochondia

OPinion