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By Garth McLennan, Sports Editor

h, big game hunting, a Aw past time of red necks

everywhere. After all, what’s more manly and courageous than blowing out the brains of an animal that has no clue you’re there with a high-powered rifle?

Okay, sarcasm aside, is hunting a sport? You do need a measure of accuracy to, you know, shoot the animal in the head. And I suppose there is something to be said about having to go out into the woods, track and locate the animals. And to be clear, I’m talking about big game hunting here, not things like rabbits or birds.

Beyond that though, I just can’t really see how anyone could classify hunting as a sport. I mean, the competition level doesn’t exactly bolster its chances. I mean, you'd have to be a really crappy hunter to let the bear beat you when you’ve got a gun that allows you to shoot it from hundreds of feet away. It’s not like you have anyone or anything to compete against.

I am by no means one of those fanatical animal rights activists or anything, but I just don’t understand the appeal of big game hunting. There’s nothing wrong with hunting for food, but hunting for sport is really a big joke. Let’s be honest here. What sort of sense of accomplishment could you possibly get from sniping an animal that is quite

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literally, totally defenceless? How could anyone take pride in that? There’s no real challenge. You just have to track big game, wait until it goes to graze or drink and then pop it in the skull. Wow, that must be the essence of sport right there.

I mean, what exactly does that prove? That you can kill something that is unarmed from a long distance away when it isn’t looking? Usually in real sports when someone attacks you from behind they get some sort of penalty. But in hunting, that represents some sort of significant achievement? Hmmm...I guess that most big game hunters aren’t all that proficient at winning fair fights.

But you do get trophies right? I mean, after you take out the animal you can cut off it’s head and plant it on your wall at home or in the office. And hey, sometimes you can even remove the head of all the skin and just keep the bones.

Christ, who am I kidding?

THE VERDICT:

So in big game hunting there is no other team to beat, no points to score and the, for lack of a better word, competition, not only has the intelligence of a baby or small child but they don’t even know you exist until their brains are lying on the ground beside them.

Alright, by this point in the article you might have a small inclination as to where I’m leaning on this one but I’ll say it anyways: hunting is not a sport.

Vancouverites to compete for beer pong supremacy Team Devil's Lettuce of Vancouver to compete in World Series of Beer Pong

Jerome “Trick Tickler’ Holtkamp and Shane “Macktastic” Mulligan

By Liam Britten, Editor in Chief

Finals, but at least one team from Vancouver is going to be competing for a championship this year.

Jerome “Trick Tickler” Holtkamp and Shane “Macktastic” Mulligan will be competing in this year’s World Series of Beer Pong (WSOBP) in Las Vegas for a shot at $50,000 and the respect of alcoholics and frat boys everywhere. They will be competing against over 100 other two-man teams in the biggest tournament the sport of beer pong has to offer.

For those unfamiliar with the sport, beer pong is a drinking game that involves two teams throwing ping pong balls into cups of beer. The playing surface is set up like a ping pong table, with each team’s cups set up in a triangle formation on either side. The goal is to sink a ball into each of the opponent’s beers (which the opponent then drinks) until none are left. Teams take turns shooting but the team not shooting can distract their opponents with any sort of non-physical antics they can dream up. The last team to have full beers on their side is the winning team.

Holtkamp and Mulligan’s team, Devil’s Lettuce, is heading into unfamiliar territory. They only got the idea to compete at this level because of a feature on the Art Mann Presents TV show documenting the WSOBP. The two of them had been playing the game for years since it was introduced to them by a friend returning from college in the USS. and figured they might have a shot.

“We figured we played beer pong all the time, why not try and make

I: may not be the Stanley Cup

some money off it?” Holtkamp said at

a fundraiser tournament for his team’s entry fees at Port Coquitlam’s Treehouse Pub. “There’s a good chance we’ll

get ona roll ... but there’s also a good chance we’ll play our 12 games and we'll be out. But I figure we’re pretty good, I’m pretty confident, man.”

While Team Devil’s Lettuce is pretty confident about their chances in Vegas, they admit nothing’s a sure thing in the game of beer pong. A lot depends on who hits a hot or cold streak at the right or wrong time and even against their own friends in Vancouver, a loss for Devil’s Lettuce is not uncommon.

Still, when they finally hit Vegas, they’ll be going in with a plan to get into the heads of the competition and throw them off stride.

“Our strategy is just be a dick, just be awkward and stupid and funny, just get people off their game plan,” Holtkamp said, stroking his porn star- esque moustache. “That’s why I got the moustache. Anything goes as long as it’s legal.”

And if there’s one thing they aren’t worried about, it’s the amount of beer they’ll be drinking, which will be substantial—the preliminaries of the WSOBP last for two days, and in those three days, they could be downing dozens of beers.

“We’re about a 36 out of 10 when it comes to drinking beer,” Mulligan said. “Maybe 36, 37 out of 10?”

The World Series of Beer Pong takes place from January 1—5 of 2010 at the Flamingo Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas. For more information including how to sign up your own team, visit www.bpong.com.