TAKE EIGHT WOMEN WOMEN Women’s awesome eponymous debut was recorded on a series of ghettoblasters and tape recorders. start turning heads in the very near future. If that wasn’t enough, Calgary indie icon Chad VanGaalen produced and arranged much of the album. The four members of Women used to be in a highly technical metal band called Veritas, and while their new project is a fairly drastic departure from their roots, their excess guitar chops shine through on their jangly psych-pop arrangements. Songs like “Black Rice,” and the painfully short “Group Transport Hall,” are slotted in next to eerily ambient jams, and the end result should start turning heads very soon. - Luke Simcoe NESTLE CARAMILK BARS Okay, so for a trip down memory lane, I recently tried a candy bar I hadn’t had in a long time: the classic Caramilk. Worst mistake ever; I’d completely forgotten how goddamn crappy this piece of shit candy bar is. It’s like they took the lowest quality caramel, covered it in the lowest quality chocolate, then doused it in yak piss just to give it that little something extra. I don’t know why anyone ever eats these things; my mouth feels like its just been in a remake of 2 Girls 1 Cup. I don’t know what it’s like to be raped in the mouth, but eating a Caramilk bar is close enough. Go die, Cadbury. —Liam Britten MAYBE SMITH. ANE ie x ARCHITECTS | LOG RONG. | MAYBE SMITH ANIMALS & ARCHITECTS Colin Skrapek, a.k.a. Maybe Smith is a one-man electro-pop band based in Saskatoon. He’s been floating around on the CBC Radio 3 charts for a while now, and his latest outing, the juxtapositonally named Animals & Architects, is a toe-tapping journey through Skrapek’s inner sanctum; straightforward indie-pop is involved in a lock-step with kitschy beats and quirky lyrics. Of particular note is leading track, “Open War,” during which Skrapek muses about a girl “who gave head to her priest, even though [she doesn’t] eat meat.” The only complaint is that the rhyme and meter that Skrapek uses for his vocal delivery is too oft-repeated, and as a result, a few songs are almost indistinguishable. - Luke Simcoe FUTURAMA THE BEAST WITHA BILLION BACKS The latest Futurama movie gets points for not simply retreading old ground. The first straight-to-DVD movie, Bender’s Big Score, while hilarious, really lacked innovation, and instead went for safe laughs by using the series’ winning jokes of the past. Beast With a Billion Backs, however, is almost a complete departure for the series. The movie is strong in theme, tackling love, religion and loss in an often poignant, always hilarious way. The plot has the classic A-story and B-story formula, but manages to tie everything up nicely in the end. One problem is that the film too often goes for the obvious laugh, making the whole thing seem a little too lowbrow for the usual Futurama aficionado. If they perhaps avoided the urge to cram too many jokes as possible into this thing, the movie would have been a complete winner; it’s quality, not quantity! —Liam Britten STARBUCKS PUMPKIN SCONES I’ve always thought that pumpkins are one of the most underrated fruits. I mean, just think about it. You can buy all sorts of crap that tastes like kiwis or pomegranates, but the only thing you can get in pumpkin flavor is the occasional pie on Thanksgiving. Thankfully the good people at Starbucks have corrected this historic wrong and now sell delicious pumpkin- flavored scones all year round. Savory and lightly-spiced with rich sugary icing and a crumbly texture these treats make a perfect companion to any latté. Only trouble is they’re only available during breakfast hours, so get “em while you can. -J.J. McCullough PARAMOUNT DRILLBIT TAYLOR (DVD) The DVD edition of the latest Owen Wilson movie was released on July 1 and is good for the regular Seth Rogen- inspired laughs. Like most movies he’s in, Owen Wilson steals the show, and he works very well with the young cast. The movie follows unemployed bum Drillbit (Wilson), who answers an internet ad posted by three kids needing a bodyguard from a school bully. Despite the silly-sounding plot, the show was actually really funny. It is also released in an extended unrated survival version, which is loaded with deleted scenes, extended commentary, a gag real, interviews with Seth Rogen and co-writer Kristofor Brown, and numerous featurettes. —Garth McLennan July 7, 2008 TRIDENT ORANGE SWIRL GUM The latest in Trident’s “crazy flavored slime in gum” series, Orange Splash is actually pretty tasty. They’ ve managed to perfectly capture that unique orange- and-vanilla essence of the creamsicles you grew up with as a kid (especially in the first getl-releasing bite, which is pure bliss). The only downside, as is the case with all gums, is that the flavor is very short-lasting. I found myself having to pop at least three pieces for a decent-length chew. -J.J. McCullough 20TH CENTURY FOX JUMPER (DVD) Just released on DVD, Jumper, starring Hayden Christenson, is a surprisingly good movie that is fun to watch. Sure, some things don’t make a lot of sense, and yes, they leave more than a few things unexplained, but on the whole, Jumper is worth the DVD price. Christenson redeems himself for his abysmal Darth Vader performance, and he’s supported by a strong cast including Samuel L. Jackson and the O.C.’s Rachel Bilson. The movie is about David Rice (Christenson), who has the unique gift of being able to transport himself anywhere at anytime. He’s pursued by the paladins, whose sole goal is to eliminate the Jumpers. The DVD package itself is excellent. Commentary is provided along with a behind the scenes look at the film. Jumper is the first in a new franchise of three movies. —Garth McLennan 13