Guess again, grandpa: Why marriage
isn't high on my priority list

» Millennials simply aren't ready for the commitment

: Your Grandma would always

: walk by the farm at quarter past
: eight, and I would smile at her

: while I tended Father’s fields...”

Br in the days of flower
children and easy living, the
“in” thing was to get married

at age 20. And yet, despite the
incredibly early marriage date,
many of our grandparents

are still happily bound 40,

50, even 60 years later.

Marriage has changed
dramatically over the past
half-century. The 1960s saw
childbearing as part of what The
Atlantic’s Peter Berkowitz calls
“the core of marriage’s social
meaning.” But fast-forward 50
years and 20-somethings aren't
focused on getting married. In
fact, the notion of walking down
the aisle usually sits at the very
back of the millennial brain.

Of course, to relay to your
grandparents every Christmas
that you got a bigger office isn’t
nearly as exciting as bringing
home that special someone.
Our grandparents would sigh
and remind us that they aren’t
getting any younger. Grandpa
would say: “Back in the day,

before all this Instabook and
tweet-tagging, true love existed.

They would get married at

: 21 and would still be together

: some 40 years later. At this point,
: Grandpa would turn to you and

: say, “See, it’s not so hard!”

Well, Grandpa, it is.
For one thing, marriage is

nothing like The Notebook. We
: don't live in black and white while !
: working the fields. It’s obvious

: that our millennial priorities

: have shifted. Despite the advent
: of apps that make “dating” as

: easy as swiping right, we have

: a serious case of cold feet.

There are those in the

: older generation who said “I

: do” as early as 18 and still find

: themselves very much in love.

: After growing a successful family,
: these 60-somethings are now

: jet-setting to different vacation

: spots to relive a honeymoon

: forgone for their early families.

Meanwhile, 18-year-olds

: of today are just receiving

: freedom from asking to go to

: the washroom, are driving the

: highways for the first time,

: and are choosing the life paths

: they want, instead of the ones

: the government demands of

: them. In addition to upholding
: a steady job and reputation,

: we have no time to start a

: family. The hunt for “the one”

: is placed on the backburner

: until our mid-20s—but a

: degree, a few jobs, and a couple
: dates later, we're already 30.

It’s a classic chicken and

: egg argument: our grandparents
; put the family first before their

: teenage dreams of success,

: while millennials are focused

: on discovering our passions

: and fulfilling our dreams to

: pay off the crippling student

: debt that will accumulate

; during our soul-search.

Further, our generation

: is arguably afraid of the word

: “commitment.” Getting married
: and living with someone is

: asking a lot from both parties,

: and since we're all a little bit

: selfish, marriage gets set

: back while we figure out what

: we want. No one gets into

: relationships thinking of divorce
: five years down the road, so we

: push it aside. Fear and pride in

: tow, we're ona never-ending

: search for “soulmates.”

Somehow, the world has

shifted our focus from love of

: each other to love of things.

: What may have been easy for
: our grandparents is definitely
: not the case anymore. Back

: then, there was little debt,

: fewer career options and less

: distractions—all things that

: prominently plague us today.

  

Image via thinkstock

 

Political correctness,

» Poorly aging TV shows

: see older shows fail to meet

: today’s standards for political

: correctness, it needs to be noted
: that Scrubs isn’t that old. The

: show ran eight seasons and

: finished in 2009. How is it that

: not even a decade ago, a program
: could get away with a male

: character walking into a room,

: briefly interacting with another

: man, and then commenting toa

: woman, “Oh yeah, great vagina”?

gos was one of my favourite
shows growing up. There was
something infinitely loveable
about the annoying narrative
prowess displayed by J.D. (Zach
Braff} as that merry band of
stereotyped misfits navigated
the real and not-so-real issues
of hospital life. Whether it

was Carla (Judy Reyes) trying

to convince Turk (Donald
Faison) she was Dominican, the
Janitor (Neil Flynn) looking to
prank J.D., or Dr. Cox john C.
McGinley) begrudgingly showing
a human side, Scrubs amused
and entertained.

Unfortunately for Scrubs,
the show has proved not to be
like wine—and if it is, it’s an
already-opened bottle that’s on
the decline. It hasn’t aged well.
Homophobic jokes abound and
sexism is rampant. I took ina few
clips and episodes the other day
and couldn’ stop an occasional
involuntary half-cringe. Not quite
tantamount to a balloon marked
“childhood innocence” popping,
but certainly an eye-opener.

And inasmuch as it’s not
that much of a surprise to

In one of those, just-how-

: self-aware-are-they-being

: moments, the show once had

: a flashback during a sexual

: harassment seminar about how

: some people were from another

: era, and hence, couldn’t adjust. It
: managed to illustrate how casual
: ass slaps were unacceptable while
: blatantly ignoring the obvious

: objectifying words and actions

: so cavalierly employed for the

: duration of the program.

But this piece isn't really

Stat

: works as the years march

: on. Yes, they generally have

: some shortcomings in the PC :
: department, but are we to punish :
: such productions for something
: they had no control over: what

: was socially accepted at the time? :
: Orare they given byes despite :
: the fact that public perception

: typically starts shifting before

: such programs reach their end?

Moving beyond that, does

: it really matter whether we give

: these modern-day relics a pass

: or fail? One is highly unlikely to
: be watching a TV show for any

: reason other than enjoyment,

: so it stands to reason that if the

: material is offensive, it simply

: won't be seen. The flipside of the:
: coin is that eventually everything :
: has historical value and can be :
: viewed ina different, if not softer, !

: light. They take on the title of :
: “classics.” Take Huckleberry Finn
: by Mark Twain or pretty much

: any Disney movie—more racist

: : references in there than yawns

: about Scrubs or the fact that Braff :
: has failed to produce anything
: truly timeless in his career,

: it’s about how we'll perceive

: all of these once-enjoyable

during a second viewing of

: Garden State. We freely accept

: the dated undertones because

: the work has become a time

: capsule—a snapshot of the past.

This isn’t to say that I’m

: putting the fine folks at Sacred

: Heart and Huckleberry Finn on
: the same level, but it is food for
: thought. Are Scrubs and similar

 

: shows merely too recent to
: appreciate yet? Or is there more
: that separates the classics from

: other works than just time?

Image via scrubs.wikia.com