othereditor@yahoo.ca

 

 

 

  

\\ia,

 

 

Dear Amanda,

I am a snoop. Not habitually, just at Christmas time, but still, it’s a problem and I
need your help. I know it’s wrong, and yet I can’t control myself. ’'ve been snooping out
my Christmas presents for years and, to tell you the truth, I always look forward to it.
Does that make me a terrible person? My boyfriend seems to think so.

I promised him that this year I would refrain from my usual festive detectivework—
but I can already feel my resolve weakening. Please, tell me what to do. Save me from
myself and my snooping ways.

Yours truly,
The Girlfriend that Stole Christmas

Dear GSC,

Hmm, that’s a dilly of a pickle you’ve got yourself into, Snoop Dog. But before we
proceed, I feel it’s only fair to warn you that I may not be the best person to advise you
on this matter. For you see, I too, suffer from the addiction of Christmas-gift snooping.

Yes, I’m afraid it’s true-even I am fallible. As a young child, every December I would
indulge in the act of breaking into my parents’ bedroom while they were at work, taking
care to memorize the exact positioning of the stack of presents in their closet before
diving in and getting a good preview of what to expect on the 25th. Now that I no
longer live with my parents, naturally my holiday snoopery has expanded to encompass
those lovely and thoughtful gifts purchased by my boyfriend.

So you see, I can relate to your problem GSC. But my question to you is this: Is it

Last Call

Amanda Aikman, OP Columnist

really a “problem” at all?

I mean I, like you, realize that stealing the oomph from our gift-givers isn’t right. Yet
I too, like you, am unable to resist the overwhelming urge to rifle through drawers and
computer seatch histories as soon as my significant other’s back is turned. The “prob-
lem,” as I see it, is that we have been shamed into thinking our snooping is wrong when
in fact it is a holiday tradition that we have cultivated from a young age. Oh sure, they
say we're the selfish ones for ruining their Christmas surprises, but aren’t our boyfriends
being just as selfish by asking us to give up a time-tested and valued holiday ritual? Yes,
yes they are.

And your boyfriend might act all hurt and offended when he finds out that you hap-
pened upon the watch he bought you for Christmas last year, but really, if he didn’t
want you to find it why would he have just left it laying around in the old guitar case he
keeps hidden in the crawlspace? I mean seriously, that totally wasn’t my fault.

Besides, the important thing isn’t the “thing” wrapped up under the tree at all; it’s
the fact that you have each other to share this wonderful holiday with. Try telling him
that. If he believes you, chances are he’s the gullible type, and their presents are always
the easiest to find. Good luck!

Happy Holidays
Amanda Aikman
lastcall_op@yahoo.ca