issue 27// vol 46 humour // no. 17

How to celebrate traditional
holidays online

> In-person events are out

EG Manilag
Staff Writer

 

Ba of this pandemic, people

are banned from gathering in large
groups. This means that there will be no
traditional celebrations nor festivities.

Most importantly, holidays mean nothing
because everyday is a holiday for non-
essential workers; we all experienced it last
Friday. “Oh wow, it’s a holiday today, which
means we are going to have a very, very, long
weekend. Hooray?” I say. Even though our
current situation sucks, we are lucky to have
the mighty Internet to keep us all together.
Without further ado, here are tips on how to
celebrate traditional holidays online.

Halloween

I guess Halloween parties will never be the
same. In fact, wearing a mask and other
costumes that remind us of the coronavirus
on Halloween might be a disaster. People
just won't buy into these costumes, for
sure. If costumes won't work, then this
leaves us with the most exciting part of
every Halloween party ever: candies and
chocolates. Despite all that’s happening,
at least we can order candy online. I’m
also hopeful for an app that allows you to
ring someone's virtual doorbell asking for
candies—with free, contact-less delivery,
of course.

Birthdays

I think celebrating birthday parties
online would be a good bargain for many
reasons. For one, you do not have to
spend on decorations, food, drinks—but
you also shouldn't expect any gifts. But

in short, you

will save money!
Furthermore, you
do not have to
clean any mess,
except your tears
around the floor
since you know
that you are going
to be ultimately
bored and lonely
again after your
group video chat

ends.

Summer festivals
No doubt, there
are numerous

cool and exciting
festivals in
summertime to
look out for. From
music fests, to
flower fests, garlic
fests, and many
more—you name
it! Nonetheless,
they are all
cancelled, which
is funny but sad

at the same time.
Well, this leaves
us with no choice but to celebrate them
online. If you want to celebrate music, then
play some of your favourite music—online.
Or, wait for your favourite band to play
their songs, online. If you also want to
celebrate garlics, you know the drill—order
some online. Or, if you want to celebrate

THESE ARE THE PEOPLE

aor

 

THE GUY WHO CLEARLY JUST ROLLED
OUT OF BED

 

THE GUY WHOSE KIDS NEED A
SNACK RIGHT NOW.

 

 

 

ON YOUR ZOOM CALL

THE LADY WHOSE DOG NEEDS
TO GET IN ON THE CONVERSATION.

 

 

 

 

THE TECHNOLOGICALLY IMPAIRED ONE

 

flowers, then order them online. One
caveat though for the flowers: people might
assume youre hosting a sad event.

New Year’s Day

Celebrating New Year’s Eve would really

be changed forever. The only thing left
unchangeable, I think, is everyone failing
to meet their resolutions. Please do not give

  

Illustration by Sonam Kaloti

me any of those “New year, New me’ posts,
please. I'd highly appreciate it.

Valentine’s Day

No changes at all. We already have the
famous Tinder app. Besides, no one even
loves you even on the other days of the year.

 

\S MASK Js
Tinea ME FEE/

(e

No!

“ee

 

Smack!

= \e@

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

don’t
touch
your
face

Comics by Nova Sawatzky