Opinions

April 7, 2008

Aimee Ouellette
opinions @theotherpress.ca

 

 

Putting the “Men” back in menstruation

Aimee
Ouellette

Opinions editor

 
    
 

a you ever had a chronic sinus
infection? Or a cold that just wouldn’t
go away? Or weeklong stomach flu?
I'd like you to imagine, for a second,
that these painful, annoying symptoms
reappear every month, plus, not only are
you mostly unable to make them cease,
you are forbidden from even letting on
that you are suffering from them. This
is menstruation in a nutshell—half of
the population, give or take, menstruate
on and off for most of their lives. Why
is it, then, that the mere mention of the
word “period” elicits groans and looks
of disgust from people who otherwise
appear to be adults? Why are women
forced through social pressure to censor
a valid part of their experience?

Part of it is the fact that feminism
simply hasn’t finished doing its job: lots
of things that belong only to women
are seen as unsavory and disgusting
simply because of their feminine
associations. Another possible aspect of
our unwillingness to talk about periods
is that we in North America have a weird

and unnecessary fear of the human body,
but this is certainly not the sole reason
for our lack of respect to a woman’s
cycle: we may be squeamish about some
body parts, sure, but generally only
when they’re accompanied by two X
chromosomes. I mean, when was the last
time you heard
someone refer
to a boner? I bet
it was only an
hour ago—unless
you’re currently
watching the
Comedy Channel
or are living in
a frat house, in
which case it was
probably five
seconds ago.

I'm not
saying that all
men are ignorant
of periods. This
is certainly not
the case. Men
who have dated
a fertile woman
for longer than
21 days are
generally at least somewhat up to speed
on the process. Men who grew up with
sisters, or a body-positive mother, are
also likely to know what’s up down there.
There are a lot of men, however, who
feel that any discussion of menstruation
within earshot is a vile affront on their
(obviously fragile) masculinity. I don’t

 

know why people base traditional
masculinity on the revulsion of all things
feminine, but here we are.

Being an opinionated person (and
also, frankly, someone who takes pleasure
in making prudes uncomfortable), I’ve
never been shy of discussing the human
body, and that
™ goes for periods,
too. The result of
this is that all of
my friends, male
and female, are
the type of people
who aren’t
easily made
uncomfortable
by “girl stuff.”
After being
around rational,
feminist-minded
people for so
long, I had built
myselfintoalittle
bubble —_ where
having a period
is a-okay, and
where casually
mentioning
it in mixed
conversation (the same way you’d
mention that you’ve been tired lately, or
that your nose is running), is nothing to
get upset about.

So it was quite a surprise to me
when, during a creative writing workshop
at Douglas College, I was given the
“ewww treatment by a fellow student.

I read aloud a story I had written, and
was waiting for feedback from the class.
My story wasn’t about periods at all: it
was actually about a close relative who
was diagnosed with cancer and died at a
young age. That close relative had been
in the house when I got my first period,
and had helped me through that big
moment in my little-girl life.

My classmate’s response to my
story, which was about death, sickness,
and family ties, was “Did you have
to tell us about your period?” As if his
incredibly macho, masculine ears had
been assaulted by the simple fact, the
very mention, of my female biology.

Here’s a newsflash, guys: you
came from inside a woman’s body, and
childbirth is a helluva lot more sticky,
slimy, and painful than menstruation.
This means that during your very first
moment as an independent person on this
earth, you were absolutely covered in
lady juices. Take this into consideration,
and decide: are you really too good to
hear about periods? Women are forced
to hear all about male genitals and male
sexuality every day, whether we want
to or not, and very few of us have an
attitude about it. When you make a gross-
out face at the mention of a woman’s
“yucky” body experience, you’re
sending a message, and that message is
that you only care about women’s bodies
as a decoration, and not as the incredibly
useful biological marvel they are.

 

Waiting for our perfect union

By Aimee Ouelette, Opinions Editor

 

Rie Barack Obama made a
speech about race relations in America.
It was called “A More Perfect Union,”
and it was a stirring attempt to tackle
racism without being hateful, bitter,
or divisive. Pundits and journalists
reported that Obama’s speech was both
insightful and inspiring, and even The
Daily Show’s Jon Stewart remarked

that finally, someone had “spoken to
the American people as if they were
adults.” After watching the speech, I was
left wondering whether or not British
Columbia needs such a_ politician;
someone to tackle the undercurrent of
racism that flows just beneath the surface
of our very multicultural society.
Certainly, Canada’s relationship
with racism is very different than
America’s—we have different histories,

different populations, and different
attitudes. What we do share, however,
is the butting heads of multicultural
sensibility and the fearful racism of social
conservatives. In America, however, this
split seems to be largely geographical.
Progressive multicultural communities
thrive, but so do overwhelmingly
racist ones. In British Columbia it is
very different: our racial makeup as a
population is much more balanced and is
not as ghettoized as in many parts of the
USA. Our “visible minorities” simply
aren’t minorities anymore. If they are
to be referred to as minorities, it is in a
way that (as when the term “minority” is
applied to women) is only culturally —
and not statistically —correct.

Despite the fact that our society is
much more integrated, and given that
there is less history of slavery in Canada
(although horrible conditions did, and
sometimes still do, exist for minorities),
residents of the Lower Mainland still
encounter racism on a daily basis. Why,
then? What are the conditions that cause
such racism, and how can it be rooted
out?

As I thought of all the past times
I have heard racist accusations made
on public transit, a pattern occurred to
me, and I will suggest this pattern to

you for consideration. I believe that the
vast majority of racist offence in the
Lower Mainland is perpetrated by those
of a different generation, a generation
less likely to have been brought up
in multicultural classrooms or with
experience of interracial friendships and
dating.

Although age often brings wisdom,
many of our Canadian elders suffer from
having been brought up in a time when
multiculturalism was more of a talking
point than a reality. I’m not sure what this
means for anyone who wants to change
the status quo immediately, but for the
rest of us who are excited about one day
living in a society when racism is more
of a strange societal fringe then a strong
undercurrent, it appears that all we have
left to do is stay vigilant, and wait.

The next time any of you are insulted
on the SkyTrain by an older person who
is simply unable to stand the sight of
you, consider telling them this: “You
may think that I’m undeserving of your
respect because of what I look like, and
that saddens me. But the good news is
that your racism will die with you—and
I’m willing to wait it out.” Then make
sure to smile prettily, because it isn’t
nice to disrespect your elders.