OO eG te SO TT OT The Other Press Abortion - looking at the slogans Re: ‘‘abortion - Look .Past the Slo- gans’’, by Calvin Sandborn, Oct. 26/85 editorial in the Sun. Recently, there has been increasing by Janet Pollock attention on the development of the fetus as related to abortion. We are moved to compassion for the fetus as it is aborted in a film like ‘The Silent Scream’’. What about compassion for the women carrying these fetuses? With the advancement of the ultra- sound devices and other medical technology, do women’s problems (and actually, men’s also) no longer matter? Sandborn in his editorial begins to allude to these problems, and suggests ‘‘but social problems require social solutions, not the spilling of innocent blood.’’ However, he and others like him do not seem very concerned with proposing such solutions but merely horrifying us with abortion tech- niques. That is precisely the problem, for until we prevent unwanted preg- nancies, the need for safe, legal abortion will be there. With the advent of the birth control pill, many feel it is safe to assume that no one need become pregnant unless they wish to do so. However, even the pill is not 100 per cent effective. For medical reasons, some people cannot take the pill, and because of the risks involved, others may use a medically safer, “but less effective method of birth control. The IUD can cause pelvic inflammatory disease, which in turn causes sterility. The use of spermicides over a period of time has been shown to be linked to cancer of the cervix. And how about the way we raise our sons and daughters? Nearly al- ways the responsibility for the care of or the prevention of children is placed on the woman. In addition, we tell them that ‘nice girls don’t’ - and if they do, they certainly don’t plan for it by using birth control. Pornography objectifies and humiliates women, and in sanctioning the existence of this material, society says that those attitudes are okay. Thus rape and incest are often not seen as the serious crimes that they are. No one said that abortion is plea- § sant, but it must be available. We as a society must be committed to finding safe, effective methods of birth control. We must raise our children with the attitude that sex is healthy and normal, and something that requires responsibility, not some- thing that is dirty and: is alright for § boys but not for girls. We must 5 encourage our children of both sexes to take responsibility for their actions by using birth control. What startles § me is that many of the people who are against abortion are also against sex education for the young and the availability of birth control to unmar- ried people under the age of 19. That is equivalent to giving a person a loaded gun and not telling her or him how to avoid hurting themselves with it. Preventing people from protecting @ themselves will not stop them from engaging in sex, and it will increase the number of unwanted pregnancies, and therefore will increase the num- ber of abortions. However, even if society were to take responsibility for its sexual act- § ions and rid. itself of a double standard, abortion must still be avail- able for the victims of sexual assault. How can anyone take a self-righteous stance and wish someone to go “through the ‘a pregnancy conceived in such a violent act, intended to humili- ate and degrade. Abortion should also be an option for those whose amnio- centesis reveals fetal abnormality. Not all of us have the necessary capacities to raise an abnormal child or to give 5 up such a child at birth. (And often, there is no one willing to adopt such a child). To demand this of a person is { cruel and unfeeling. If the anti-choice people achieved their goal and abortion was fully criminalized, would they work as fervently toward the goal of prevent- ing unwanted pregnancies? | think not. Yes, where is compassion? Twas a dark and stormy night... John Stickums | went home as | often do at the end of the day. My key opened the door and allowed me to gaze at the castle that is my home. | checked my answering machine. | have no friends who would call and | have no reason . to use the machine since nobody ever calls me. But | won the machine in a bingo game and | feel the Gods of bingo would be mad if | didn’t. | pressed the button and to my great astonishment | had a message. | felt very afraid. | have always tried to avoid contact with the outside world. Still someone had taken the time to leave me a message and | was obligated to listen. “Man of Earth,’” the message began ‘‘we were in need of a queen for our race and happened to be passing by your home and found the perfect one. We thank you and ask you to take great care with her j because she now houses our next king.’’ “Ye Gods!’’ | said to myself. | looked at my ferret Felix. | don’t believe it! My own pet was to be the queen for a new race. What an honor. | supplied him with a pillow from my { own personal bed and permitted him an extra helping of ferret chow that night. By the end of the day | was exhausted, mentally, physically and economically. | had pampered Felix as best | could and now he lay asleep. | decided to allow myself the luxury of an episode of the Transformers that-| had set my VHS to tape earlier that day. When | got to the machine | found the tape missing. ‘‘Zounds!’’ | exclaimed as | looked at the timer. It was set for nine months and counting down. The aliens had mated with my video recorder! & Two weeks ago, | was downtown to 5) f& experience fine music. The music, = specifically, was that of Unnatural . by Proteus Mollusc Silence, who are a fine group of zi conservative young men that dress = tastefully in fine Expo-motif socred : pinstripes, and do a fine job of : singing the praises of profit, exploita- & tion, death, mayham, steak, and 2 winnable nuclear war. | tell you, they convinced everyone S) to become an accountant, buy a house 5 and a vacation package, and ignore 1 that commie-tainted news. We did. ) We all gave each other hair-cuts, and ) learned the Secret Socred Used Car 5 Salesman handshake. Being as hungry as one might 1 expect after a religious conversion of ) such magnitude, Kaz-Argh, slayer of ) Mammoth and giant ground sloth. sand Sue, elven were-elephant of the = swamp pixies and |, Proteus Mollusc, Hevil King of the Yodelling Bipedal & Cephlapod tribe, set out to...eat. = Cries of ‘‘Egad! a two-legged man- @ squid’’ were greeted by the phrase ® ‘Happy Hannukah in Hamster Hell, } Sergeant! Keep your mother in a ; thermos!’’ and a deft flick to the belly 1with a chocolate coated peppermint ) razor. And then...We ATE. We stuffed ourselves with the great ;French Fries of the Earth Goddess, = Hamburger Mary. This brings me to ) my first issue, Racoons on Davie. = 30 years ago, a migration of Lysol- & loving peoples began into Stanley 1 Park. Here they have built many awe : inspiring architectual wonders from S sticks, cooking wine bottles, poly- G ethylene sheets and mouldering = sleeping bags. As fabulous as this @ indigenous culture is, it has evidently a displaced the previous inhabitants of = Ye Olde Kingdom of Stanlie, the ® racoons. = ‘‘Oh, look at that,’’ belched Kaz- ® argh in an eloquent grunt. Turning to ® see whatever morsel he was hungrily 0 pointing at, | spied that terrible ) black masked beast of Disney-myth. S ‘““Ave Aquilave,’’ | hailed him. B® Thecreature glanced at me, but did = not respond. | can even now only = assume that he was mute, left to eke © out a living in garbage cans, dog food : bowls, and the flesh of Fresh Felis 1 domesticus. ® So | consumed my potion of tele- 5 pathy: and proceeded to communi- fe O15 \ yy C } J cate. “Yah, I’m a racoon, So what? | don’t need that forest life bullshit. Ls t { f 5 [ if C i { 3 ae aber, 71985 page of 5 } ) i ‘Wonderful harmony of nature,’ you r people rant on. | tell you, I’Il take half § a Big Mac over dormant wood grubs § And here, my god, there’s women, & booze, the lights, last weeks Enquirer and stupid old ladies that say-’‘Oh, look kids, look at the cute racoons, aren’t they sweet? Go on, give them my fried chicken.”’ So what the hell? | eat, and take off to the next place. Stupid broad & doesn’t even realize that I’m what & happened to her darlin’ little persian. Anyways, this broad, she keeps § gettin closer an’ closer to me. One 5 day, I’m gonna eat, an’ then, I'll let & this broad pet me. An’ just when she { touches my _ head-HAI!-I’ll take a ® ) z i ey any day. e finger, or maybe take an eye out, or @ somthin’. Stupid broad.’’ is There we have it. The cold, high @ pressure street life that turns a peaceful forest dweller into a hateful & maniac. Give generously to the Ra- coons on Davie rehabilitation fund this Christmas. Oh, yeah. Santa Claus S3as>ssso Ras Santa Claus is an evil wizard that was kicked out of somebody’s king- dom a long time ago for giving the little princess a toy that neatly strangled every heir to the throne except himself. Luckily, the process was stopped before its completion. Santa Claus is nearly immortal thanks to a potion he concocts out of reindeer blood, pen ink, and stamps, & and childrens spirits. He has tens of thousands of tele- | pathically linked clones who are in the { business of first knowing young child- § ren’s minds through a type of Vulcan @ mind grip, and then planting strange desires and thoughts into their sub- & conscious. : These clones seasonally inhabit @ shopping centers. Santa lives, not in a & cozy red house, but in a shiny black & Gothic cathedral which floats in af perpetual arctic storm on an energy P field over the Arctic Ocean. His elves are actually Daleks, and & Dr. Who has already lost several battles with the wizard and_ his : cronies. Santa Claus is at present waiting ff for the right moment to mobilize his sleeping army of mega elves. g You could be one of them! ea ie Beware ye, this could be .. a The Final Christmas!! y AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Douglas College’ s ‘Auton miovis Student Newspaper This page of The Other Press is reserved solely for the purpose of correspondence and opinion. 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