Life&Style.

 
 

By Jacey Gibb, Opinions Editor

Not Sharon. Turns out blowing off the gym for

the last two weeks and reverting back to my
archaic eating habits wasn’t the million-dollar weight
loss idea I thought it was. The absence of a weigh-in
over Reading Week proved to be, shall we say, not
great, as I gained back the five pounds I'd lost from my
previous weigh-in and am now left sitting at zero per

Re: I have some bad news, members of Team

E ° e
uy =A rude a-weight-ening

We’te in Week Five of the Biggest Loser
competition and it’s time for me to quit dicking
around—my 21-year track record of having never
eaten a cockroach depends on it! In the week before
my episode of laziness, I was able to drop seven
pounds by simply eating healthier and working out a
few times a week, so it’s not like catching up to Sharon
is an unachievable goal. Besides, if I’m to believe every
sports movie ever made, then people love an underdog.

In order to kick-start my comeback, I’ve been

cent lost so far.

Hilarious, am I
right?

Upon hearing
the tragic news,
did I buy myself
a milkshake and

try to think of excuses why this happened? Nah.

I look for no one to blame other than myself, but
luckily, I’m also able to justify my (lack of) progress.
It’s a term called The Punctuated-Equilibrium Model,
and I picked it up in one of my overpriced college
courses. It’s a concept that’s used when groups are
temporarily brought together to accomplish a common
goal. Basically, the first half of their time together is
an abyss of productivity, but when they reach the
halfway point before deadline, the group experiences
something called “transition” and undergoes a surge
of productivity. My point is: I’m down, but not out.

“| look for no one to blame other than myself, but luckily, I’m also able to
justify my (lack of) progress. It’s a term called The Punctuated-Equilibrium montage music
Model, and | picked it up in one of my overpriced college courses.’

treadmill.

scouring the depths
of my iTunes to find
some good fitness

and have emerged
with a few keepers:
“Fast Jabroni”

by Surfer Blood, “Two Steps Twice” by Foals, “I
Only Want You” by Eagles of Death Metal,” and

two more, both fittingly entitled “Born to Run,” one
by Bruce Springsteen and one by k-os. Any of these
tracks I guarantee will put you in the mood to hit the

And so here we are, entering the final stretch.
Sharon and I have both agreed that liposuction isn’t
allowed, and since there aren’t any bodily organs/
limbs that I’m eager to part with, it means I’m going
to have to kick her ass the honest, old-fashioned way.
Clear eyes. Full hearts. Can lose.

 

 

Medieval torture device or beauty must-have?
The truth about eyelash curlers

By Jenn Markham, Contributor

December—when I got a job at

a cosmetics store in the mall—so
everything about it has been new to
me. Just the other day though, a co-
worker, Kathryn Hansen, suggested
using an eyelash curler; she said it
makes a world of difference.

“The pay off is definitely worth
the trouble. It shapes your eyes to
enhance them with the mascara,
rather than just letting them hang
there,” said Hansen.

I decided to poll my friends:
of the 24 female Douglas College
students asked, five regularly used
eyelash curlers, 16 never used them,
and three only used them on special
occasions.

“T just really really like how my
lashes look after using a curler,”
said Cara McBeath.

Justyna Jaskolka said she uses
one everyday because it, “makes
my eyelashes feel like they’re alot
longer than they actually are.”

Of the women who don’t use

| never wore makeup until

10

curlers, many agree with Kaliegh
Beausoleil who said, “I don’t
because my eyelashes curl enough
with mascara. And it is a lot more
work then I want to commit to.”

The idea of heated eyelash
curlers came up on both sides too:
some were in favour of them, while
others agreed with Caitlin Van
Den Brink, who said “the heated
ones scare me... why would I
want something heated around my
eyeballs?”

Professional makeup artist
Christine Rosine warned against
heating eyelash curlers: “some
people will heat up their curlers
with a blow-dryer prior to using it
because they believe it will give a
‘longer lasting curl,’ when in reality
they’re probably just going to get a
nasty burn.”

Rosine doesn’t use her curler
everyday, but always uses one
when giving makeovers. “It
definitely opens up the eyes and
makes you look more awake.” She
does admit though that it’s her least
favourite part of doing makeup. “It

 

does kind of look like a medieval
torture device,” said Rosine “and
unfortunately if you don’t know
how to use it properly you can hurt
yourself.”

Another professional makeup
artist, Vanessa Hergert said, “I
always use an eyelash curler before
putting on mascara, on myself and
others.”

But, she also had a horror story
to share in warning. “A girl I went
to school with actually pulled out
most of her eyelashes using an
eyelash curler cause she wasn’t
paying attention and moved her
head to the side while having
the curler clamped down on her
lashes,” said Hergert.

With all this in mind, I decided
to try an eyelash curler myself,
and I have to admit, I’m slightly
surprised. For one, I didn’t manage
to hurt myself, and I did notice a
difference. Like a lot of the girls
though, I doubt I’ll use one every
day. It’s just too much work.

The Rival Report:

Sometimes, I’m an idiot

By Sharon Miki, Assistant Editor

ately, I’ve found myself
complaining about how
deprived I am while in
this competition. In the past, my
happiness often revolved around
food, so being without a cupcake
for weeks felt like punishment.
Then, yesterday, after walking
up the New West hill of death
unwinded, I realized how messed
up that logic was. And how much
time I was stupidly wasting
whining about being denied
expensive, body-harming foods.
I’m alive and I’m healthy
and I'll continue to live and be
healthy even if I never again
feel the saccharine tang of
buttercream caressing my lips. This
is something to write pop songs
about—not something to dedicate
emo Facebook statuses to.
As my friend Christine once
told me, “Cheer the fuck up,
Sharon.” Life is good.

Vota
a(erfl

\
}

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