WIF Classifieds Submit Classifeds to classifieds at othereditor@yahoo.ca Students advertise for free! For free student classifieds up to 30 words, email: rate of $5 per line. Enquiries: call our advertising manager at _ 604.525.3542. Pictures Classified pictures are $10 each _ printing. The picture size is 3.5em x 2.5m, black and white. _ When placing an ad please _ remember... All ads must be received by following Wednesday's paper. Check your ad for errors and please call or email our offices _ to report any corrections. To ensure the integrity of our stu- _ dent newspaper, we reserve the _ right to revise, reclassify, edit, or refuse yourad. For Sale Two 128MB Memory Modules 184PIN DDR PC2100 DIMM othereditor@yahoo.ca with your ; ae name, stadent number and With original packages. desired sectioff, and put “classi- A Steal at $45! E-Mail me at fied” in the subjere line email@scottelliott.com. Fast Cash Ads: 3 lines, 3 times pei Ce eee ail for $20 (30 words max). O Ce ee oe oe redcoat1812@hotmail.com. Complete P4 system with 256MB DDR400, 80GB HDD, 16x DVD+RW & K/M/S for only $399. FREE exchange K/M/S for 512MB RAM. Everything BRAND NEW. Contact Andre at acepe- canada@gmail.com if interested. Herbal products to improve your health. Choose an alternative to conventional medicine. Safe and easy to use. Contact Alex at natural_cures@hotmail.com or 604.589.8728 God curse all you rotten crude people with your machetes, clubs, and guns whi have no other way to express yourselves other than battering some poor soul. Welcome back. While y'all gather your thoughts and prepare to write in for advice on all manner of Last Call Amanda Aikman, OP Columnist Services Tutor/Proofreader (Ph.D) $25/hour for essays, thesis, etc. 604.837.1016 ot editor888@hotmail.com. Professional tutor, writing coach, and edi- tor can help with English 130, 106, 112, and 109; also Business Communications, reports, letters, and résumés. Quality guar- anteed. The Writer’s Touch, www.writer- stouch.net 604.437.6069. Vancouver Support group for stutterers. Every alternate Friday, 7-9pm. Room 4310, New West campus. For more info, contact Mary Rose Labandelo: 604.526.1735 OPTions for Sexual Health (formerly Planned Parenthood) is looking for volun- teers to assist on the Facts of Life Line, a toll-free, confidential, sexual health infor- mation and referral resource line. Call 604.731.4552 ext. 224, or visit www.optionsforsexualhealth.com. AVID HALO 2 PLAYER. Need to have Halo2 game and XBOX Live. Please contact by email. Jamie Campbell. Jamie Campbell12345@hotmail.com WATER POLO Players Wanted Students interested in participating in Intramural/Varsity Douglas Water Polo call: (604)777-6029(ext.# 3) or email:sessionpolo@yahoo.ca for more information. Teach English Overseas @ Intensive 60-Hour Program ®@ CL ‘oom Mi g it Techni ® Detailed Lesson Planning ® Comprehensive Teaching Materials ®% Internationally Recognized Certificate ® Teacher Placement Service ® Job Guarantee Included ® Thousands of Satisfied Students ‘49 OXFORD “tim SEMINARS 780-428-8700 / 1-800-779-1779 www.oxfordseminars.com q already. crazy matters, I'll take this opportunity to serve up some unsolicited tips for living that occurred to me over the holidays. So listen up people, this is good stuff. Follow these three simple steps and you are guaranteed to have a happier new year. Eat More Now, I’m as guilty as the next gal (and possibly even guiltier than that gal over there) when it comes to obsessing over calories and carbs and what have you. That’s not to say I don’t consume my share, but I do tend to natter on, much to the annoyance of my dining com- panions. Well, enough is enough; it’s only food. So just shut up and enjoy it already. Of course, I’m not saying to throw in the towel completely and embark on an exclusive diet of Big Macs and Cadbury Easter Creme Eggs, but seriously, there’s no need to beat your- self up over the occasional indulgence. And if you’re in the market for an occasional indulgence, head over to Anton’s Pasta Bar on East Hastings. Whoa, daddy, now that’s a spicy meatball! I went there over the break, and I’m still working on my leftovers. You’ve never seen pasta served in such insane portions. I dare you to eat it in one sitting. Scratch that, I dare you to eat it in three sit- tings. Speaking of sittings, you’ll want to get to Anton’s early if you plan on getting one. That joint is lined up down the street mostly every night. Mmm, a giant plate of linguine and a giant glass of red wine—now that’s amore. Laugh More Believe me, I’ve wasted too much of my life taking things seriously and letting the bastards grind me down—it ain’t worth it. So, learn from my mistakes and lighten up, There’re all kinds of opportunities for jocularity out there. You’ve got your comedy clubs, your America’s Funniest Home Videos, and even your nitrous oxide. But forget about all that, ’cuz there’s a new sheriff in town, and he’ll have you in stitches in no time flat (from laughter, not police brutality). And what, pray tell, is so funny? Well, it’s the super terrific hilarity of The Ricky Gervais Show. It’s not a television show, or stand up, it’s a podcast available for download on iTunes. And, Oh...My...God is it funny. The show consists of Ricky Gervais and collabo- rator Stephan Merchant, the comedic geniuses behind BBC’s The Office, chatting with the ridiculously hilarious Karl Pilkington. Eventually, there will be 12 episodes available, and believe me, you will never get tired of listening to them. So bloody funny. Love More Open your mind, your heart, your legs—however you want to interpret it. Life is too short to waste time holding back, so what are you waiting for? This year, feel everything there is to feel and experience everything there is to experience. Let your- self love people and let them love you in return. Make it your goal to forge genuine con- nections with people, because this is it—this is your life. It doesn’t start next week or next year or after you graduate, it’s happening now, so don’t settle for that “life half-lived” bull- shit. No sir. Turn that bull around, take it firmly by the horns, and go for it. Ole! True, an open heart is a more vulnerable one, but even when you’re wallowing in the depths of love’s lowest lows, the memories of its highest highs are worth the suffering. So put this paper down and go spend some time with someone you love. I think I’ll do the same. See you next week. lastcall_op@yahoo.ca