Nick Hogg,
OP Game Ghaul

 

Instead of doing my normal thing by
reviewing just one game, I’m going to take
a look at classic horror games, and use
bad puns like “Spooktacular.” Why, you
ask? Because I’ve been locked in the base-
ment without my GBA SP to provide light
and it’s all dark and scary down here. So
what better thing do I have to do in the
dark then tell scary stories about video
games that I’ve played? It will be just like
ghost stories around the campfire (minus
the camp and the fire). Speaking of fire
it’s very cold down here.

The most classic of the classic scary
series is the Resident Evil series. (An inter-
esting fact about this series is that the
games are called Biohazard in Japan, but
because some crappy metal band has that
name it had to be called Resident Evil over
here.) First off, these games aren’t.“scary”

 

scary, they’re campy, horror-movie scary.
Take Resident Evil 2, the only really scary
thing about that game is the fact that a
small-town police department has a sta-

tion larger than Douglas

complete with its own library, clock tower,

College,

and historic art wing. Not to mention the
three-story marble lobby decorated with a

Qetaber 27/2004

 

fancy statue fountain. I mean really, there
are zombies all about, but I can’t get over
how expansive the police station’s library
is.

I must take time to point out that the
most horrifying part of Resident Evil, as a
series, is that you can’t go anywhere with-
out the aid of three keys, a couple of
crests, some sort of jewel, and in most
cases, some kind of crank. But this
is still a somewhat scary and
the
campy-ness factor, which

fun series. Now to
is basically determined
by how old the game is.
If you pick up the origi-
nal Resident Evil, or two
and three for that matter,
you can expect a campy
but enjoyable romp with
guns and zombies. These games
also include completely outlandish
settings, like the mansion with its own
underground | scientific research
facility and the giant small-town
police station , complete with
art museum, library, and

secret underground
research facility. The
GameCube remake of
Resident Evil 1 and

Resident Evil 0 come off a
lot more serious, being i
slightly more realistic, or as realistic as
something concerning zombies can get.
Bottom line, there is lots of zombie
shooting, lots of weird puzzles, and at
about six hours a pop, it
makes for a decent scary
evening,

On the other hand, it
just doesn’t get any scari-
er than Silent Hill (Note:
there is no hill of which
they speak of in the title,
nor is the game silent). I
think this basement has a
gas leak or something.
My jokes seem to be get-
ting worse. Si/ent Hill
seems to take perverse
pleasure in freaking you
out and disorientating
players. In what other
game are you equipped
with only a tiny flashlight
to discover gruesome
wallpaper that bleeds and
nonsensical monsters?

For added fun, in every
game you're given a broken radio that
crackles with static as monsters approach
you, and that’s capped off with a sound-
track that will send chills down your spine.
This is a series of games that most of us
are too scared to play alone. Despite the
fact that some parts of the plot may be a
quick laugh, the games are eerily creepy,

    
 
   
  
 
 
  
  
 
  
  
 
 
  
 
  
  
 
 
 
 
  

= D Arts and Entertainment <==

suspenseful, and non-formulaic. I really
wish they could make horror movies this
good. I urge anyone who can convince
someone to watch them play, to go out
and get one of the Sv/ent Hills from 1-4.
Silent Hill 1 was on the PS1, 2-4 are onPS2
and 2 is also on Xbox. So you’re covered
as long as you’re not a Nintendo-exclusive
person.

Damn, I really think there are some
kinds of fumes down here, but that
brings me to the last but not least,
the game that’s so bad it’s scary,
Evil Dead: Fist Full of
Broomstick. This is a game with
everyone’s favorite retail clerk,
Ash. Is this game scary? No.
Does it have great game play?
No. What it does have is a
button to make Ash make
“Ash-like

Enough said.

an remark.”

 

So go off and game for your yearly
dosage of scaring (hopefully [’ll be
gone from this fume-ridden base-
ment by then). Hey, maybe I need
», some sort of jewel key or crest to
get out of here. But at the very
least, hopefully this crackling
radio will

get reception

sometime.

+O ee