Culture

Something About How Much I Hate

New Orleans Continued

greasy strip joint.

Granted, that last point might appeal to a lot of the
younger guys reading out there, but that’s not the point.
However, you might like to know that the French Quarter
is the only unlicensed public place in America where you
can drink open liquor in the streets without legal ramifica-
tions. Mind you, it has to be in a plastic cup, and it has to
have'a straw. No. Seriously, a straw.

There are twice as many strip joints as music halls. Café
du Monde has a wait line the length of Stevie Wonder’s
legal bill. And the hottest place to hear live music is the

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“Custard for Mine”

local House of Blues venue. And no, they don’t play blues
there.

To be frank, I’d rather take a walk with my family down
the corner of Hastings and Main than roll out of a restau-
rant on Bourbon Street after 10pm. And while this might
not seem like all that big a deal to most people in the
world, it’s meant to be an expression of my disappoint-
ment in my experience there. This wonderful place that
once played host and home to some of the most brilliant
and innovative musical minds in history has been turned
into a loud, dirty, obnoxious, overcrowded hellhole. It’s

14

damn-near impossible to find a nice, quiet jazz bar. And
the street corners that once inspired so many mediocre
Paul Simon songs now inspire nothing but a thousand-man
hard-on every day.

This Friday, November 4, is the 74th anniversary of the
death of Buddy Bolden. I don’t know about the rest of
you, but I'll be spending it listening to the Original
Dixieland Jazz Band of the 1920s, mourning both Bolden’s
death, and the death of the wondrous city that he called
home.

 

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