January 28 1998

INDOCTRINATED

  

CHRISTIN

CATHY TAM
A HOLTZ

Stealing from Aqua since 1976

Ber A

CHINESE CANADIAN PONDERS
WHAT Ve MEANS “TOBE

BEAUTIFUL IN OUR CULTURE,
AND FINDS SHE FALLS SHORT

have always disliked pink and as a child I

watched more G.J. Joe than My Little Pony. So
it was only natural for me to skip the whole
Barbie thing.

I never owned a Barbie nor ever wished to. Yet,
because I watched a lot of Smurfs and Care Bears |
inevitably sat through countless commercials
hawking the latest Barbie.

Through the weekly ritual of Saturday morning
cartoons, it was my distinct misfortune to have had
Barbie imprinted on my brain as the epitome of
feminine beauty in much the same manner as
Pavlov’s dog. Over and over again the little girls
would brush their Barbie’s hair just so,

styling it just the right way, adjust the

~
PHOTOS
doll’s already immaculate clothing, and then step
back to admire their handiwork, announcing in
sugary tones bursting with giggles, “Oh how pretty
she looks!”

How pretty, indeed. Barbie, with her long
blonde hair, big blue eyes with impossibly long
eyelashes, svelte body in daunting proportions,
long legs and incredibly arched feet has long been a
North American pop culture icon. So it was that a
child with black hair and brown eyes—growing up
at a time when crayola still made “flesh coloured”
crayons—came to long for wavy blonde hair and
blue eyes.

Being a bookworm didnt stop the barrage of

images on TV. After reading Laura Ingalls Wilder's
books, I took to watching Little House on the
Prairie. Even little Laura envied Mary for her
blonde hair and blue eyes, and they were sisters.

Quite frankly, growing up Chinese in western
society has given me a peculiar set of mix-and-
match values. And the Barbie factor doesn't help
things. I stand 155 cm tall (for the metrically
challenged, that’s 5’2)—not short by any means,
just not tall. Compare my legs to Barbie’s one-sixth
scale ones and mine are positively stumps. Not to
mention that my hips are too wide by far. It’s a
good thing I have small feet, but I could never wear
the killer heels that Barbie prefers. I teeter precari-

ously on 2-inch heels, and if I actually were to

wear anything longer I would probably fall and
break a leg.

Surely it must be every little girl’s dream to grow
up and have a boyfriend like Ken. Tall, dark and
handsome, and he goes everywhere with you when
you want him to. He also doesn’t mind being the
only guy in your bevy of friends and he never
objects to you dressing him in clothes that you like.
He is never boorish and doesn’t spend the whole
afternoon in front of the TV with his friends,
acting like pigs. All in all, Ken’s pretty great. Alas,
poor-me doesn’t have a boyfriend like that. In fact,
I don’t have any boyfriend at all. Guess that makes
me a failure, right?

Over the years, Barbie has been a doctor, top-
level executive, astronaut, scientist, surfer-babe and

  
 

DeS$
Scandal

Baghtdad rocks - page 4
Colours supplement - Insert
Rage against the Machine - page 3

Volume 22 «issue 15

 

all-around happy teenager. As I’ve never had any
serious aspirations to be a doctor, nor astronaut,
nor scientist, nor surfer-girl, that deems me as a
failure yet again, by the Barbie factor.

I have failed in yet another way, according to the
standards of Barbie. I hate to buy things if they are
not books. The blatant consumerism encouraged
by Babs and her ilk never really made any sense to
me. You would have to be crazy not to want a car
of your own. Barbie has one. Then again, a pink
sports car is a little much. Exactly how many outfits
with matching accessories does she have in that
pink dream home of hers, anyway?

And speaking of buying things, have you looked
at the price of Barbie lately? Sky-high prices for a
piece of moulded plastic. Never did I see a Barbie
advertised on TV that wasn’t the classic Barbie. I
didn’t know that there was an Asian Barbie for sale
until I started researching this article. Browsing the
toy department at Eaton’s, I found one solitary
Japanese Barbie. True, the cast of its features were
not that of the Western Barbie, but dressed in a
kimono, the doll is removed from the everyday and
therefore a novelty; an aberration from the norm.

What exactly is Barbie trying to say to little girls
of Western extraction? Get breast implants, go
anorexic, bleach your hair, buy tinted contacts
because only perfect people have any fun.

Come on Barbie, let’s go party. @

FOR MORE OF OUR SPECIAL COLOURS
ISSUE, SEE FOUR PAGE INSERT