© Opinions the other press e Kalithurber opinionsubmit@hotmail.com January 21, 2004 Tyra Banks on Her “Supermodel Stardom” Kali Thurber Opinions Editor Not all supermodels are stupid, I’m sure, but Tyra Banks enforces the stereotype of the no brains, all body supermodel with unashamed enthusiasm. Appearing on Conan O’Brien’s late night show on Tuesday, January 13, Banks looked like a skeleton poorly disguised as a human being—a style choice more startling than stunning, and not at all pleasing to the eye. Thankfully, Conan O’Brien saved the entire show by mak- ing jokes that America’s favourite supermodel didn’t even pre- tend to understand, and generally gawking at her breasts. In a moment of weakness Banks gracefully admitted that she went through a spell of dating “regular guys” who worked as con- struction workers and FedEx deliverymen. She seemed rather proud of herself for giving the public information that made her seem so human, but I wasn’t fooled. When asked why she put a stop to her normal guy dating days, she guffawed at Conan with a look that said, “Are you kidding me?” and told him that she needed to date someone who could afford the plane ticket to wherever she was working at the time. I imag- ine FedEx guys dont really cut it in the financial department when you're making millions of dollars to stalk up and down a platform in your underwear. But Banks doesn’t see the mark of being over 30 as a reason to quit her “Supermodel Super Stardom,” (her words, not mine). She intends on not only continuing with her star role in the UPN reality series America’s Next Top Model, but to take on the work of making movies and (wait, get this) singing. Yes, it's happened, Tyra Banks’ fame has gone to her puny head, and allowed her to believe that she can sing, and not pop, or hip hop, but folk. I fear the day that I see Tyra Banks on a purposely dusty stage with a leopard print cowboy hat cocked to one side, singing a Peter, Paul and Mary song in her Victoria Secret lingerie. Please, something must be done. The model/actress soon to be turning singer practically ate Conan O’Brien right up when he mentioned her now red hair. “We're fiery,” (meaning redheads) she snarled, and leapt at Conan with her teeth (wait, are those fangs?) showing. This is a woman who says she, “Like[s] being in charge.” What I would like to do is walk right up to her and ask, “Are you for real?” This woman needs to be stopped, before she takes over every category of the entertainment business, and turns it into a world of dimwitted, skeletal beings smothered in black eye- liner, and silicone. Productio More Problems Than it Solves David Suzuki A massive new scien- tific study that found high contamination levels in farmed salmon made headlines last week, but the results shouldn't really be surprising. Applying industrial production methods to raising food animals has caused problems at every turn. Both beef production, and salmon farming have been in the news recently—and not in a favourable light. According to a study published in the journal Science, farmed salmon contains up to ten times as much contami- nants, such as PCBs and dioxin, as do wild salmon. Many of these contaminants are believed to be cancer-causing agents. In fact, con- tamination levels are high enough that the report authors recom- mend people eat no more than one serving of farmed salmon per month. The salmon farming industry had criticized a previous study that found similar contamination levels because it used a small sample size. This time, researchers tested some 700 fish—totaling more than two tons—from markets and whole- salers all over the world, including Vancouver and Toronto. They con- sistently found high levels of con- taminants in farmed fish. The source of the contamination is likely the food fed to farmed salmon. Salmon chow is made from other, less profitable fish, har- David Suzuki Foundation vested from all over the world. This fish is then ground up and made into fishmeal. The problem is that organic contaminants like PCBs “bioaccumulate” in the food chain through animal fat. This means’ that, as one fish eats anoth- er, the contaminant concentrations get higher and higher. All wild fish, including salmon, suffer from this problem, but farmed fish fare the worst, likely because concentrating fish into meal accentuates the bioaccumulation process. Proponents of fish farms will likely regard this as a minor set- back for a growing industry. But salmon farming faces a host of other problems, from site pollu- tion to sustainability issues. Right now, three to four kilograms of wild fish are needed to be ground up into food to produce one kilo- gram of farmed salmon. So, we are depleting wild fish stocks to pro- duce contaminated fish. \ Beef production has also been in the news again due to the discovery of another case of BSE or, “mad cow disease,” in North America. While the risk to humans is rela- tively low, the incident again exposes the problems associated with mass-producing meat with a focus on profits rather than human or animal health and welfare. BSE would likely have never been a problem if factory farms did not try to increase the growth rate of cattle (and therefore, profits) by feeding them meat products— including other cattle—essentially turning herbivores into carnivores. Factory farming, whether it’s for pork, beef, chicken or salmon, treats animals like raw materials that are processed and turned into an end product—meat. Animals in these systems are literally treated like inert matter. Little thought is given to their welfare. They are crammed into small spaces, some- times by the thousands, and fed antibiotics to increase growth rates and reduce infections. Salmon farms use pesticides to kill off par- asites. Hog farms create so much waste that they pollute surround- ing groundwater, rivers, and ocean shorelines. By trying to force industrial fac- tory-style processes that focus entirely on profit and efficiency onto agriculture, we've created huge problems for ourselves. Is it really worth jeopardizing human health, polluting our water, and depleting our ocean fish stocks just to have 99-cent hamburgers, cheap pork rinds, and fresh salmon year round? It’s time to take a good hard look at our priorities and con- sider more than profits in the way we produce meat. Take the Nature Challenge and learn more at . I saw these three beautiful men inside the Vancouver Art Gallery a few days ago, admiring a painting in that way that artists look at other artists work, and thought, “Hmm, the best things always come in three’s.” I accidentally (really, I’m not a stalker) heard one of the men say, “I gotta get a burrito man, I just broke up with my girlfriend.” Not quite the speech I expected from an artsy fellow. Some people turn to alcohol and drugs in their time of need, but this guy turns to burritos to satiate his anxiety due to the absence of his girlfriend. He wins the quote of the week, hands down! I want- ed to swish my hair around, slide up to him, and slur, “Hey, hey uper-fly-guy—you got something up your sleeve for tonight, or hould I make some plans for the two o’ us?” But while I was swish- g my hair around, it dawned on me that I would just be another one of those flaky chicks that dates artists so they can feel like they have some part in the artistic world. Also, I hate burritos. -http://www.otherpress.ca «¢ Page 7