—— 1S ald = ENbEroONMeNG =

The feature poet, Keith Haubrich, was a mixture of simple, funny haiku’s
and horrid use of profanities. A note to future slam poets: Putting the word
“fuck” in the middle of another word does not a poem make. Kit de Luca did
it with “Cinda-fuckin’-rella” in Pretty Woman, and frankly, I don’t think any-
body should ever do it again. Keith did tell a few jokes, and though they felt
strangely out of place at a poetry slam, they did get the audience laughing. The
best one-liner (“How many Atkins diets does it take to screw up the food
chain?”) was quite a hit with the primarily vegan crowd at Café Duex Soleil. A
virgin at slam, Tahim, did a brave freestyle piece, in which he took audience sug-
gestions for the subject of his poem. With the unlikely themes of rainbows, male
itch, and barbeques at his disposal, Tahim produced an amazingly coherent rap
incorporating all three. It really was quite impressive, but apparently not
impressive enough to win.

 

As it was, the monotone Fernando won with his poem in the second round
that portrayed him declining rock star orgy parties because they would cut into
his masturbation schedule. The night could have been more powerful had the
bigger, better slam poets been there (namely Shayne Koyzan, and Barbara Adler)
but it was enjoyable in an “I hate poetry, but this is kind of funny” way. It’s true
that I heard the words “time,” “eternity,” and “love” more than I’d have liked to
in a lifetime, but sometimes that’s just the way it goes. As a farewell, Spelt got -
back on stage to say, “don’t ever let anyone tell you that art is meaningless,” and
suppressing an urge to tell him that he should give me some reason to think oth-
erwise, I almost let out a hiss of my own.

 

 

; Fiat

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16 | OUnEPPPeSS

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