210 ax Lawsuit a dish best served with microgreens and edible flowers » Woman sues café over non-photogenic food presentation Roshni Riar Staff Writer | ae internet foodie and 27-year- old veterinary student Susanne Richardson is suing the newly opened New Westminster café, Greens & Grains. The reason: Greens & Grains’ food, consisting of specialty sandwiches and salads, is not “Instagram-able” enough. By not dressing up their dishes to be more photogenic, Richardson argues that Greens & Grains is hurting the like and follower counts of hopeful internet foodies like herself. In an interview with the Other Press, Richardson expressed her reasoning behind the bold legal action. “You know, I was really excited about Greens & Grains, but their lack of attention to detail really let me down,” said Richardson. She opened her Instagram to reveal a Weekly horoscopes grainy photo of mac ‘n’ cheese amongst a grid of pink lattes and rice bowls topped with flowers and delicate garnishes. “I had to upload a photo of my boring, home- cooked meal and it got a fraction of the likes that a beautifully plated dish from a new, buzzworthy spot would have gotten,” she said to reporters. “I'm suing for loss and suffering. The café not only disappointed me but also my followers. I wasn’t able to provide them with the content they expect of me and I ended up losing three whole follows. Do you know how humiliating that is? I even contemplated deleting my account, but I know my followers—all 214 of them— wouldn't want me to give in like that. This kind of behaviour can really dash one’s spirit. But I’m here to say: They can't slow my Insta-train down!” Rachel Lowe, General Manager of Greens & Grains, was not impressed with Richardson’s extreme approach. Have an idea for a story? M humour@theotherpress.ca “At the end of the day, we are a dining establishment. Our main concern is to provide people with good food that they want to come back for. Sure, it’s not the prettiest but it’s not like we're serving buckets of slop. Check our 4.8-star Yelp reviews if you don't believe me.” Jillian Bart, a respected pro bono lawyer, weighed in on the case. “Susanne is young and not very grounded in reality. I can foresee this lawsuit being dropped before it gets any real traction. The press is probably more than enough for both parties involved. Besides, the café never advertised that their food was going to be beautiful. No restaurant has to do that.” Jimmy Wilkinson, a diner at the restaurant, shared his opinion on the situation to the Other Press. > Procrastinating? Me too! Things to do instead of urgent, pressing matters: ¢ Five ways to comfort your partner when they ugly cry ¢ 'Baby on Board ' sticker reveals no baby on board e¢ ..and more! Photo by u/TheNewJanBrady on Reddit “Well, it’s another one of these bougie cafes that makes a decent cappuccino and overpriced sandwich. I didn’t notice that the presentation wasn't outstanding because frankly, I don’t care. I don’t have Instagram. Well, I do but I don’t post. I mainly just creep. Anyways, the food’s pretty good. I’m not sure that this lady has her priorities straight.” “] just want them to think about what they're doing by not sprucing up their plating,” Richardson said to reporters. “It’s not hard to make your food look good, but they just won't play ball. I was hoping this would be wrapped up by the time of my midterms but it’s not looking so likely.” Speaking on the worst-case scenario, Richardson said that at the very least, she would accept a full refund for her meal and perhaps a gift card. Isabelle Orr Entertainment Editor ARIES (March 21 - April 20) Dont you dare crack open a book today, Aries! Skip any and all classes and head directly to the mall. Skip the sale rack and head straight to the “just in’ section in every store. Finally, buy $10 of Claire’s merchandise and enjoy a nice Orange Julius to top it all off. TAURUS (April 21 - May 21) Instead of household chores, immediately leave your house and buy no less than four baked goods (two of which are chocolate chip cookies). Walk to a park, eat two of the pastries under a large tree and save the last two until you get home. Eat them in bed—but be careful of crumbs! GEMINI (May 22 — June 22) Feel good today, Gemini! Scour your apartment for the best selfie lighting and snap a shameless pic. Slam a big mug of tea and rely on that sweet, sweet internet validation to boost you through the rest of the day. You've earned it! CANCER (June 22 - July 23) Use today to meal prep for the next eight years. We're talking planning for a nuclear holocaust. Use absolutely every ingredient and Tupperware container in your kitchen until your freezer resembles the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark. (July 24 - Aug 23) Though it may seem like cleaning is something to procrastinate from, consider this: How can you possibly think about any of your flaws, insecurities, or anxieties while youre scrubbing away three years of grime from your bathroom floor? You can’t! Break out the rubber gloves and really go to town. § V/REO (Aug 24 — Sept 23) Go through your entire Spotify collection and weed out any songs that don't spark joy (how did so much Arcade Fire get in here?), while simultaneously making playlists for everyone in your life. Don’t leave anyone out! I'd better see a “For my fave dentist” in there! LIBRA (Sept 24 — Oct 23) Sorry Libra, I procrastinated on writing these horoscopes and honestly? I’ve got nothing for you. You'll just have to entertain yourself—that’s what Netflix is for, right? ‘SCORPIO (Oct 24 — Nov 22) i Now’s the time to pick up all those weird old lady hobbies that you've been putting aside for when you turned 80. That's right, we're talking stamp collecting and rock polishing, baby! Haven’t seen a stamp in four years? Neither have I! But the world is your oyster—or at least, your poorly-polished granite. £A& S/GiTARIUS mae (Nov 23 — Dec 21) Go online and add absolutely everything you've ever wanted into your virtual shopping cart. When it comes to checkout time, click the big red X in the corner of your browser. Done! As an added bonus, you'll get semi-annual emails reminding you about what you didn’t buy—future procrastination! CAPRICORN (Dec 22 — Jan 20) Drive to your parents’ house (no matter how far) and demand to see all family photos before 1995. Point at every person in the picture (even if it’s just a cameo of your parents’ old mailman’s ankle) and ask, “Who's that?” You'll be stuck in their house listening to rambling stories about the good ol’ days for an estimated nine years. eg. AQUARIUS aS (Jan 21 - Feb 19) Recreate, by hand, the entirety of Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women using only Plasticine dolls and yarn pulled from old sweaters. While youre slowly going crazy in your own workshop (AKA your communal kitchen), think about how small your problems are compared to the poor March sisters as Beth succumbs to scarlet fever. PISCES (Feb 20 — Mar 20) Pluck your eyebrows! When's the last time you did that? Cut your nails, too. While youre at it, shave all the hair off your arms, legs, and toes, and finish by trimming your split ends before shaving all of your hair off. Once everything is removed, cover yourself in olive oil and throw the front door open to finally confront what you've been procrastinating on. It’s a brand-new day!