issue 09 / volume 41 Don't Be That Guy: Butt-hurt cupid » Love is more than romance i Mercedes Deutscher Staff Writer h, Valentine’s Day. Love is in the air, the roses are overpriced, and reservations at all restaurants filled up months ago. Isn’t it magical? hides his insecurities behind complaints that Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a commercialized day created by Hallmark. He scoffs at the Valentine’s Day cards in the a box of chocolates, only to feel sad and eat them alone. He whines, “Woe is me, I’m single on Valentine’s Day!” What That Guy doesn't realize is that there is so much more to Valentine’s Day than overpriced merchandise and romance. First of all, Valentine’s Day is not a Hallmark holiday. According to some stories, it : originates from the martyrdom : of Saint Valentine, who : ministered the illegal marriages : of Roman soldiers to their : lovers. The romantic nature of : Valentine’s Day traces back to : the days of courting a woman : before asking for marriage. But enough about history. It’s understandable that . : not having a romantic partner That Guy is not pleased. He : on Valentine’s Day may be : upsetting. But to be fair, it’s : probably worse not having a : mother on Mother's Day ora : father on Father’s Day. There are worse things in : the world than being single. In aisles. He feels obligated to buy : fact, being single on Valentine’s : Day is honestly better than : being ina relationship. You : will save money, you won't be — : : stressed from planning a perfect : : date with perfect presents, and : : all while having to wear perfect : clothes. If you're looking to : get more hours at work, it’s a : good day to do so, since many : probably want the day off. Valentine’s Day, while : originating with romantic love, : can cover different loves as : well. Many children exchange : Valentine’s Day cards with : each other. I’m fairly sure that : kindergarteners don’t feel : romantic feelings towards the : other 24 children in the class. : No, this is a form of platonic : love. You most likely experience : more platonic love in your : lifetime than romantic love. : What better time to celebrate : the love that you have towards : your family and friends than : Valentine’s Day? Every February : 14, | would wake up to a card : and either chocolate or a teddy : bear from my mom. She loves : me, so she gets mea Valentine’s : Day present. At the very least, you can look at Valentine’s Day as : “Cheap Chocolates Day Eve.” Valentine’s Day for singles : isn’t the worst plight. It’s all : about how you look at the day. : You could be That Guy or you : could make the best of your : situation. opinions // 19 Image from Thinkstock Bedroom blues » How does casual sex affect your self-esteem? “hs, Pia Araneta The Martlet Ca sex is a growing trend in today’s hook-up culture. The westernized world is straying from traditional values, altering our perception of sex. Long ago we bid adieu to sex as a simple marital act, and emerging adults are becoming hornier each day. Though its integration into our leisure time may not necessarily be a pressing vice, what are the effects of casual sex on our mental health? On university campuses, sexual opportunities are bound to arise. The pressure to get involved can lead to undesirable situations—such as the walk of shame the following morning. These encounters challenge our self- esteem (keep in mind we're dealing with a social group that is confused about 80 per cent of their daily decisions, and use the Socratic Method to determine what’s for lunch; it’s only natural for us to be unsure if we like our faces or not). And let’s be honest: we live in a world where sex sells. Everything is over-sexualized and glamorized, upholding : a maddening pedestal where : being size two means you're : probably getting laid every : day. And if you're anything like : me—wearing a full tracksuit : and eating a jar of Nutella : while watching the Victoria’s : Secret Fashion Show—I think : it’s safe to say none of us are : fully satisfied. The “ideal” body image : is exaggerated to the point : where our sexual self-esteem : is affected. “Am I crushing : him? Can he see my cellulite?” : We question our appearance : and weight, which ultimately : makes the stress-relieving act : stressful. If we’re preoccupied : by thoughts of our own bodies : inthe bedroom, I think we : havea problem. And without — : : the support of a steady, healthy : : relationship, we can lack the : assurance necessary to be : confident in ourselves. Because casual sex is : purely a physical act, not : much is regarded other than : the physical form—and it’s : our most vulnerable form! : Being naked brings out our : insecurities, and with an : unstable roster of partners, we : choose to partake in a vicious : cycle where we are constantly : subjected to the judgments of : others. This clawing need for : approval, in turn, never brings : us satisfaction. With that in mind, casual : sex is not entirely a bad thing. : No one will persecute you : for participating in a culture : that fuels the sexually active : population, but remember to : be proactive about the type : of people you choose to sleep : with. The roster you build : determines the role sex plays : in your life. It’s quality, not : quantity; and I’m not talking : about whether it’s good or : bad sex. (Sex is like pizza, : right?) I’m talking about : what is reciprocated from the : people you choose to sleep : with. How do you feel after : having sex with them? Are you : mentally exerting yourself to : please them? If so, you should : seriously re-evaluate who you : choose to be intimate with. Image from EngageWithLove.com I used to be self-conscious : of my every move in the : bedroom. After a while, I : realized demanding complete : darkness, and praying they : didn’t see my third nipple, was : a civil war on its own. If your : partner doesn’t make you feel : good, you don’t need them. So : keep eating that jar of Nutella : and love your third nipple. : Your third nipple is the sexiest thing ever.