Arts & Entertainment

 

 

What I’ve Bee

Lalonde, OP Arts & Entertainment Editor

ev

Harsh Times

dir. Dave Ayer

bt know how sometimes you see a trailer
for a movie that your instinct tells you will be a
steaming pile of crap, but you say to yourself, “Nah
man, Michael Mann is a good director, he can’t screw
up Miami Vice,” or “I bet itl] be even better than
Silence of the Lambs”? If this is a phenomenon that
you’re familiar with, then you’ll understand why I

figured I'd toss out two hours of my day off so as to
watch Harsh Times, the taut, mind-bending psycho-
drama from the creators of Training Day. Or so they
say.

But try to see where I’m coming from. Christian
Bale is a fine actor, and has this great streak of
really good films over the last two years. So he can’t
possibly be in a bad film, right? And “‘it’s from the
creators of Training Day? Then it can’t blow!” How
wrong was I.

So the movie opens, and Bale is literally having an
acid flashback or something of killing guys in Iraq. Or

 

something. I don’t know, it’s never really explicitly
stated. Then he wakes up, goes back to his home in
South Central LA, and starts dropping “dawgs” and
“shizzles” all over the place. No, not that I’m opposed
to the hallmarks of different minority ethnic groups
in urban locations, but man, even Christian Bale, the
excellent actor that he is, can’t credibly pretend he’s
black. He can’t even act like he’s pretending. He just
looks like a doofus.

Of also, Harsh Times lack decent writing and
scripting, acting, sound, and computer generated
stylizing. It’s a pile of poo.

 

 

10

 

 

Trailer Park Boys

dir. Mike Clattenburg

I finally got around to renting this sucker
earlier this week. And frankly, I’m pretty lukewarm
on the whole thing.

Normally, I’d discuss the plot of the movie, the
history of the television show that spawned the
concept for the film, or the value that we as a nation
place on these three mildly-retarded East Coasters.
But if you’ve ever seen a single episode of the show,
and still have an interest in watching the movie, you
already know about all that. Basically all I want to
say is that if you’re a fan of the show, you’ll like the
movie. Yes, the boys go to jail, yes they fuck with
Mr. Lahey, yes somebody shows up to the park with
a gun. There’s some boobies, there’s some dope-
smoking, there’s some hilariously mispronounced
words, and that’s it.

But hey, it’s not like I can complain. I got to see
some boobies after all. Now go read something and
expand your mind, damnit!