issue 4// vol 46

arts // no. 7

An analysis of Riverdale’s writing

>» Coo-coo bananas for unrealistic television

Sonam Kaloti
Arts Editor

 

LS: cut to the chase: I’ve heard enough
about Riverdale’s “bad writing.” The
entire world likes to roast it, and everyone
can just stop talking about it because I’m
going to settle this once and for all.

Some might say the dialogue in
Riverdale is “coo-coo bananas,” and
they would be right. In case you haven't
noticed—it’s weird. It doesn’t fit in, and it
doesn’t want to fit in. But...is that the truth?

Dialogue in most fictional shows is
unnatural. There’s a simple solution as to
why though: because it’s a fictional world!
What, you think Riverdale’s line “I’m so
over the toxic masculinity in this hallway
right now!” is more abnormal than the line
“Tam the dragon's daughter, and I swear
to you that those who would harm you
will die screaming.” Yes, the latter is a line
straight out of Game of Thrones. Yes, GoT
is a fictional world and that excuses the
fact that no kings, queens, or dragons talk
like this in real life. Oh what, dragons don’t
exist in real life? Neither do the following
characters from the Riverdale universe:
Papa Poutine, the Black Hood, or Sabrina
from Sabrina, The Teenage Witch.

Let’s pull this “coo-coo bananas” line

 

back. If you were a real hefty Canadian
connoisseur like yours truly, you would be
reminded by the most iconic female lead
of all time: Manny Santos (Cassie Steele)
of Degrassi: The Next Generation. | like

to imagine that she is the embodiment of
the sass and confidence that the Riverdale
writers are trying to emulate with Cheryl

Promotional image for ‘Riverdale’ via FilmDaily.com

Blossom. Manny’s scene with her thong
showing above her jean waistline alone
can inspire a character fitting of Cheryl
Blossom. Let’s not even get started on how
Emma Nelson of Degrassi is a poster child
for the “innocent only on the outside”
character frame, exactly like Miss Betty
Cooper.

What I'm getting at is that these
characters and their weird personalities,
dialogue, and mannerisms aren't ground-
breaking, so I agree they can be classified
as “no-good” due to their unoriginality.
But the characters are getting heat because
they’re not written to act like normal
people in the real world, and this is, in
my humble opinion, ridiculous. Get your
priorities straight, people!

If there’s anything to be angry about,
it would be the plot writing. So many
good potential plots are just thrown into
the Riverdale black hole. From Jughead
getting addicted to G&G, Betty getting
brainwashed at the Sisters, to just losing
the high school dynamic which brought in
most of Riverdale’s original fanbase in the
first place, the show has lost touch with
what would really come as a shock to the
audience.

Viewers have been plot-twisted so
much that they’re wrung out. What the
show needs now is a solid foundation
where the story can evolve from being a
cluster of teens playing adults and running
around the town murdering anyone to
something that takes time to build and ties
up all the loose ends from every season.
Here’s hoping season four does just that.

Riverdale returns October g.

A Little Late with Lilly Singh review

>» A review, but not a review

Tania Arora
Staff Writer

keen

ow can someone’s confidence

be this high? How can someone
be this bold? And by someone, I
mean Lilly Singh, a bisexual woman
of color. If you haven't watched the
show yet, go ahead—it will blow your
mind. And if you have, you may easily
relate to each and every word I write.
The Canadian YouTube sensation
has taken not just North America
but the entire world with her storm.
Her show A Little Late with Lilly
Singh is on the top of the charts. She
is out there tearing the white and
men out of everyone. She goes by
HSuperwomanl] on YouTube; the
platform she used to prove that she
deserves every letter of her username.

Singh wears multiple hats. She
is acomedian, actress, social media
star, producer, author to one of the
New York Times bestsellers, "How to
Bea Bawse: A Guide to Conquering
Life,” and now she is a late night
talk show host on NBC. Singh is a
Canadian of Indian descent and is an
inspiration to every living woman on
this planet. She calls herself a unicorn
with pride and has a mindset no one
can ever beat. “Maybe I shouldn't be
joking about this because one of the
biggest fears of white America is that
minorities are coming to take their
jobs, and honestly, we are,” said Singh
on the show.

Her first show aired on

 

September 16 on NBC with clips
available on YouTube.

History is filled with instances
where women have faced backlash on
their color, age, sexuality, appearance,
and body type. And here we are in
2019, where Lilly Singh begins her
show by walking in and wearing a
colourful striped suit with white
sport shoes—her confidence level
touching the ceiling and breaking the
norms thereafter. In the show she lays
her conditions on the table in a room
filled with white men. “So, Lilly,’ one
of the executives say, “for your first
episode, we're thinking you enter
ina nice grey suit.” She responds,
“Grey. I prefer something a little more
colorful... obviously.’

The show has no cover ups.
Singh speaks her heart out. She talks
about the issues in a way no one ever
did. Her introductory rap says each
and every detail about her. “Hello,
my name is Lilly, and I ain’t a white
man,” she begins. “My skin got some
colour and it ain’t a spray tan.” She
has voiced the oppression faced by
Indian people and women in the
most beautiful and colourful way.

“This used to be a boy’s club but
I’m knocking down the doors. Time
to switch it up in here ‘cause now a
lady runs the show. I’m about to lead
the way for y'all with my pedicured
toes.” Singh says everything in the
most unapologetic way. If I were to
rate the show out of 10, I would give it
a100. This show is needed. This isn’t
some recorded video to preserve, it is
history.

 

Promotional image for 'A Little Late with Lilly Singh' via NBC