©) "ether ress Managing Editor Kerry Evans editor@otherpress.ca News Editor Kelly Parry kelly-parry@telus.net Opinions Editor Kali Thurber opinionsubmit@hotmail.com Culture Editor Amanda Aikman Submit_to_culture@yahoo.ca oa Features Editor Barbara K. Adamski featureseditor@otherpress.ca Sports Editor Adam “Flash” Gordon desportseditor@yahoo.ca David Lam Representative Vacant Proofreader Tamara Billau Production and Graphic Design Gerard Then layout@otherpress.ca Graphic Design Trevor Hargreaves bunkmedia@hotmail.com Photography Angela Blattmann tarantulangela@yahoo.com Web Editor Dawn-Louise McLeod dalomcl@telus.net Advertising Manager Munir Amlani ads@otherpress.ca Office Manager Lynn Paus lynnpaus@shaw.ca Accountant Alyona Luganskaya tradexllc@hotmail.com Columnists Follow the Rainbow J.J. McCullough Nick Hogg Macdonald Stainsby Cartoonist J.J. McCullough wart_mamu@yahoo.com Contributors Barbara K. Adamski, Sue Donim, Kerry Evans, Simon Jester, Ashley Laughlin, Matthew Little, Leigh MacKay, CF Miley, Ted Morrison, Lisa Moulds, Dave Pearcy, Colleen Smith, Macdonald Stainsby, David Suzuki, Kali Thurber New Westminster Room 1020-700 Royal Avenue New Westminster V3L 5B2 Ph//604.525.3542 Fax//604.525.3505 http://www.otherpress.ca editor@otherpress.ca Mail Bag J.J. McCullough Descends Into Fiction One of the nicest things about the growing use of post-consumer-recycled fibres in toi- let paper is that the Right Hook column will one day wind up being used for the Right Purpose. Mr. McCullough’s opinions have been arriv- ing from outer space ever since his piece about removing the monarchy. His column has grown ever weirder until we find our- selves at the Right Hook column of November 12. In this column, J.J. claims “leftists tried to stop the war from being launched and in doing so opposed a thoroughly legitimate goal of removing a vicious dictator from power.” Let’s take those twenty-five words a point at a time shall we? Every time somebody opposes the Bush regime, Mr. McCullough blames the oppo- sition on “leftists.” He keeps forgetting to point out that the Commander-in-Chief leans so far to the right it’s a miracle Air Force One can take off without ballast. One of the shocks to the US electorate (fol- lowing an election characterized by more rigging than an 18th century navy) was that this “compassionate conservative” was in fact a right-wing radical. Almost anyone is a left-winger by comparison—with the exception of the hawkish draft-dodgers Bush has surrounded himself with. Many ordinary Americans opposed the war in Iraq—at its highest, support for the Bush war campaign never got past seventy per- cent—that means that about 100 million American citizens didn’t support the war. I guess Mr. McCullough believes all of these people were chanting, pot-smoking, dread- locked pinko peace freaks. This wasn’t a legitimate war of any kind. Was there a resolution in Congress to authorize it? Before the tanks rolled? Was the US under attack? Oh, I forgot the famous Bush doctrine of “Unilateral Pre- ' emptive Self-Defence.” By this logic, I can legally go rolling drunks on the Lower East Side on the grounds that they may one day panhandle me aggressively. I’m certain Mr. McCullough would agree. So this war was supposedly launched with a democratic majority. But the White House had been pouring poison in the ears of the American people for a long time. Bush stat- ed outright that there were links between Saddam Hussein and al-Qaeda. The White house has since reversed itself on this— although only after the invasion. The frightened majority might not have sup- ported the war if Bush and his cronies had shown any inclination to tell some truth. But why should he let that stop his fun? By the way—have any “weapons of mass destruction” turned up in Iraq yet? No, no, I mean ones that weren't shipped -in last April. Of course, he could have tried to hound Saddam into the International Court, like Clinton did to Slobodan Milosevic. ..you're right. Forget I said that. I mean, he'd have to recognize the International Criminal Court then, wouldn't he? Not to mention following Clinton—what was I thinking? Under the reasons he gave, Bush had a right to go to Iraq without a second UN resolu- tion, although this was not a wise action. But he might have found France and Germany less determined to spoil his party had he been upfront and honest about his intentions. Oh no, wait, I forgot, if he'd told people what was really going on, he'd have had no pretext for war in the first place! And that’s really the point J.J——The stated goal of this war had SFA to do with “remov- ing a vicious despot from power.” Bush didn’t say, “It’s okay for me to attack a sov- ereign nation because its leader’s a bastard.” He said there was an “imminent and credi- ble threat” to the United States, and it was on these grounds that he launched Gulf War II (The Bush Strikes Back, Only First). I supported the Second Gulf War. I felt that Saddam was at least working on WMD, and that together with his hostility to the western world (and let’s not forget that “western world” includes Canada), this was likely to make him a threat. I believed that the side issue of his nastiness toward his own people justified his removal by any number of interested parties. Of course, since the US put Saddam into power in the first place, and gave him sup- port for several decades prior to his invasion of Kuwait, I suppose the Second Gulf War might come under the heading of “cleaning up your own mess.” Since the latest invasion, more and more lies told by Bush and Co. have been revealed, culminating in the 11th-hour appeal on the part of Iraq for a peace deal. Of course, as I pointed out at the time, the troops were already committed, and GWB would have looked awfully stupid with his hard-on sticking out into a cold breeze and no one on the end of it. But the point is that this is not what Bush told the soldiers who went to fight and die in the desert that they were going to be fighting for. It’s not what he told the inter- national community, and it’s sure as hell not what he told the American people. The weakly (yes, I know—that’s how you spell the word I meant to use) Right Hook column goes on to spout a load of tripe about Iraq as compared to Germany and Japan. “Jayj” has a point—I mean what did the war against Nazi Germany have that the squabble in the Gulf doesn’t, apart from international support (except from the US), clearly defined goals, and the need to con- tain a nation with expansionist dreams? Uh—well, forget that last point. McCullough also blames “leftist protesters” for ending the Vietnam War. This is such a complete misrepresentation of the facts that I can only conclude it’s a deliberate lie. The US prosecuted the war in Vietnam until a majority of its citizens and representatives began to think it was a bad idea—that’s how things used to get done, J.J., back when the US was a democracy. Oh—and the “billions of dollars” thrust into South Vietnam had squat to do with “stable, independent, and ultimately free” nations. It had to do with the Domino Theory, a piece of bunk political theorizing that said...actually, J.J. can go look it up. It'll be good for him to read some history, as I have noticed in prior columns that J.J. is as ignorant of the subject as he is of politics, economy, and ethics. Nuff said. I have more to say about Mr. McCullough’s towering fiction. But from twenty-five words I’ve already gotten a rebuttal of more than a thousand. The rest of this column (and his others) is similar. Stick to what you know J.J.—of course that would be the end of Right Hook, wouldn't it? Simon Jester can be reached for questions, comments, tirades, and friendly abuse at colin_x_long@yahoo.co.uk The Other Press is Douglas College’s autonomous student newspaper. The Other Press is run as a collective and is published weekly during the fall and win- ter semesters, and monthly (as a magazine) during the summer. 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