Economics

A course which will show you real life
applications of how to draw curves
that mean absolutely nothing, even to
ther economists. Proves itself as a
seudo science by having its own
anguage of gibberish rather than using
ormal English words. Delves into

ow entire countries can fall into
ereliction when one can of Cream of
astodon soup goes up by [2.3 cents.
Prerequisites: Must possess ability
o hold in Jaughter*and be prepared to

hrow common sense out the window.

nglish .

his course focuses on making things
p. Even if you do not see where DH
awrence was having a conniption fit
ith his pet alligator when he used
nly three words in a sentence,

ou will learn how to make

hese things up. Focuses on

he great authors so you can

© out and become a

retentious, arrogant slob

t social gatherings by

nderstood anything by Margaret

Prerequisites: Ability to first pull
xygen into lungs, then push it out.

un Class (coming soon)
miscellaneous class that can involve
nything that sounds remotely fun.
his class embodies all the knowledge
at you want to learn, and doesn’t
clude any boring content. However,
y the time the class is actually
ailable, the teacher and program

air will have sucked all the fun out

of it, and it will be nothing like
described here.

Prerequisites: None. Expect to have
your hopes trashed.

Geology
A weeding out course. A course
offered to get rid of those with less
than standard IQs because who in
their right mind would sign up for a
course to learn about rocks. Topics
include: Yellow rocks. Pretty rocks.
Black rocks. And a twenty page term
paper on: “Grey Rocks: Useful or
Antichrist incarnate?”

Prerequisites: Low self-esteem

Nutrition Studies

Course includes overview of how to

eat. Term paper on how many

McDonald's burgers one person would

have to eat to keep a trim figure like

John Candy. Other topics include

celery and the ever evil presence of
pasta salad and its role in society.

Prerequisites: Must be able
to find mouth with fork.

Philosophy
Allows you to think for hours on end
about things no other human being
would think about (because they're too
dull) and come to no specific
conclusion, Also works to enhance
social skills by fighting with other
people just like you about things
neither one of you have any idea
about. In three way tie for world’s
most useless degree.

Prerequisites: Must have no indi-

vidual thought patterns.

   
  
  
  
   
   
   
 
   
   
   
   
  
    
  

Political Science
Focuses on the world of
(poly—many tics—blood
parasites). Other chapters
Bribes, screwing the little
to fight your way out of
The new American sect
‘Denying everything while
straight face’ Tied for w
useless degree.

Prerequisites: Must h ve

Affair 400 and Spin Doct. EL

Print Futures

A pseudo journalism co

provides the basic skills to

widely published magazin : i

Ox Quarterly or Shoelaces o, f

Monthly or the Other Press.
Prerequisites: Must hav

Grammar 231 and Spl C 100

Psychology é
Provides a basis for learning the
medical justification for all
illnesses you think you hav ve .
the three way tie for world’s most
useless degree. x

Prerequisites: Hypochondia

OPinion