Lines Are the New Books

Stephanie Or, OP Contributor

Recently, P've found myself unem-
ployed and not entirely motivated to
find a new job—which leaves me with
a lot of time on my hands. So, each
night I find something to distract
myself with until the wee hours of the
morning. One fateful night, continuing
this routine, I was in bed but unable to
sleep. I rummaged through my collec-
tion of “to-read” books but wasn’t
completely gung-ho on the idea of
reading something I wasn’t going to
finish in one sitting, It was then that I
remembered my pile of unread zines...

Applicant, edited by Jesse Reklaw
While recycle-bin diving (it’s kind of
like dumpster diving but cleaner) at an
unnamed Ivy League university, Jesse
Reklaw found some discarded files
from the 60s. These files were comple-
mented with pictures of potential
biology PhD applicants, and featured
unrestrained remarks made by employ-
ers and former professors. Reklaw
rescued the files and kept them. Only
later did he realize it was zine-worthy
material. This zine reads like an episode
of The Apprentice crossed with (actual)
reality and every bit as cringe- worthy.
One of my favourite captions was: She
reminds me of a racehorse in the starting gate
waiting to be released.

Coffeeshop Crushes, edited by
Nicole Georges and Jon Van Oast
Admit it! You have a crush on your caf-
feine haunt’s barista. There’s no shame
in it, honestly. I worked across from a
Starbucks for years and my coworkers
and I all had a mini-crush on “Scruffy”
the bearded barista. Nothing came of
this but we always had fun staring at
him from across the concourse. (See,
no shame at all). Coffeeshop Crushes is a
collection of stories and comics of
unrequited, and sometimes requited,
coffee-shop crushes. Some stories were
from former baristas who had people
crushing on them. Silly stories and sad
stories— they’re all here.

Invincible Summer (an anthology),
by Nicole J. Georges

To be fair, Invincible Summer is actually a
book of zines (the first eight issues of
zines of the same name). I cannot
begin to tell you how much I love this.
This anthology chronicles the last five
years of Nicole’s life—heartbreaks,
crappy jobs, a move to a new city
(Portland), vegan recipes, and lots of

May 11/2005

lists. Nicole’s cute little doodles make
this a gem. I could go on and on about
this or you could go find your own
copy. I'd prefer the latter, and so should
you.

A Rough Guide to Bicycle

Maintenance, by Shelley

This is a rough-but-comprehensive
mini-guide to bicycle maintenance.
Shelley includes easy-to-understand
diagrams and step-by-step instructions.
She has an index of tools and divides
them into three categories, ranging
from essential to size-specific to your
bicycle. There’s also a detailed guide to
fixing an unsealed one-speed hub. She’s
even included a little note on how to
properly lock up your bike. You’d be
surprised how careless or unaware peo-
ple are sometimes—once, my friends
lifted (literally) a locked bike up from
the pole it was “locked” to and rode
around a basketball court with it.

Salt & Slush, by Sarah and Sonia
This little cook zine is aesthetically
pleasing and incredibly useful. Coming
from Nova Scotia, these girls know win-
ter. These vegetarian/vegan recipes will
help you through the more depressing
aspects of winter: sickness, the cold,
budget restraints, even an abundance of
turnips. There are recipes for leek-and-
potato soup, miso soup, and
turnip-and-beer muffins. Yes, turnip
and beer muffins. Go figure.

Zen and the Art of Brownie

Making, by Josh Russell

I hate brownies. I really do. However, I
was convinced that I absolutely sad to
read this zine. I kept putting it off, but
when I finally finished reading his zine,
I have to admit I was a little smitten
with both Russell avd brownies. Russell
talks about how brownies are “punk”
and gives you a brief intro to the con-
fectionary (titled “Brownie 101”). He
includes vegan recipes as well as
reviews for boxed mixes. The zine also
comes with a hand-stenciled poster
(photocopied) of Russell eating brown-
ies and declaring his love for them. He
even throws in a few of his more inter-
esting recipes, inventions that include
Cadbury Cream Eggs and Musketeer
bars, playfully named “Joshgasm.” Oh,
Josh!

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