Humour.

Laugh out loud hilarious? Cor’

at humour@theotherpress.ca

 

Royal Canadian Mint to create new coin

Toonies little sibling
the tweenie’ coming
to circulation this fall

By Keating Smith, Money Bags

he Honourable Minister

of Finance Jim Flaherty
announced early last week that
the Royal Canadian Mint will
be creating a new monetary
denomination for Canada
coined as the “tweenie.” Using
all the pennies collected by
financial institutions across the
nation, the Royal Canadian Mint
in Ottawa will simply tack weld
the pennies together in order to
create the new coin. Criticism
from Elizabeth May was heard

the new coin as a resemblance
of a Moose’s scrotum due to
its brown colour, indirectly
supporting May’s argument in
the House of Commons.

“This is just another one
of Prime Minister Stephen
Harper’s misogynistic ploys
he is using on Canadians, only
this time it involves a coin his
party has deemed detrimental
to the Canadian economy,” said
May in an exclusive interview
with The Other Press. The new
coin is rumored to have a
design that incorporates every
aspect that defines Canadian
culture as it is today. The
themes slated to be included
on the new coin include failed
environmental policies, aging-
military infrastructure, foreign
ownership of natural resources,
and Harper’s face replacing that

multitude of problems
from jamming ATM
machines to melting
in prolonged
exposure to
sunlight. Older
Canadians
may also

recall the

trend many
indulged in
when the
two-dollar
toonie coin
was released
during the

mid ‘90s where
people attempted
to remove the
middle section of
the coin by any means
possible.

“The tweenie is just another

innovative way of keeping

Using all the pennies collected by financial institutions across

66

the nation, the Royal Canadian Mint in Ottawa will simply tack

weld the pennies together in order to create the new coin.

earlier last week in the House of
Commons, calling the new coin
“sexist” due to its Euclidean
geometric shape resembling

the outline of two breasts.
NDP’s Thomas Mulcair cited

of Queen Elizabeth II on the
back.

This isn’t the first time
Canada’s denominations
have faced criticism recently.
The country’s new polymer
bills have been faced with a

Canada’s economy strong
during a global recession and
we cannot let millions of dollars
in zinc and copper go to waste,”
said Harper.

Harper’s initial plan was to
drop all remaining pennies

 

Thursday February 21st
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NI cease

collected in
the country off of
the iconic CN tower
in Toronto to determine
whether they would make
an impact on objects or the
pavement below the 553-meter
tower.

Yet another guaranteed
wallet wrecker, the tweenie
is slated to enter circulation
towards the end of the year.

You(i73Comedy Classics

Worst Cry Ever

   

SUAS UCU PL

i

http:/ /www.youtube.com/ watch?v=ee925O0TFBCA

By Joel McCarthy, Graphics Manager

It’s great to laugh at other people’s problems. Here is a little
clip from one of TV’s most depressing reality shows called
Intervention; this clip should make you feel empathetic
towards the family being featured, but I personally can’t stop
laughing. If you really like the clip you will love it even more
when you watch it auto-tuned to “I Will Always Love You”
by Whitney Houston, so search for “Best Cry Ever (auto-
tuned) the Bodyguard version” and let the laughing ensue!