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Brafire of the vanities

Can vanity and feminism
live in harmony?

By Natalie Serafini,
Opinions Editor

Pom it refers to

a modern feminist, a
feminist hipster, or a feminist
barista, depending on your
interpretation. I myself use

the term in a vain attempt to
defend my vanity (feminist

+ fashionista—get it?). I find
that as a woman, I like to look
good, at the very least to avoid
frightening young children in
the streets. Simultaneously, I
find that as a feminist, I feel
I’m betraying my radical sisters
anytime I whip out my mascara
wand.

As much as I abhor the fact
that there’s a physical standard
to which women must hold
themselves, I’ve still been raised
surrounded by the image of a
very specific kind of woman: the
busty, blonde, small-waisted,
tan-skinned, big-eyed, pouty-
lipped urban Amazon (yes, I’ve
just described Barbie). To take
a peek at my staff picture is to
realize that I, Natalie Serafini,
could not adopt the Barbie-
aesthetic without some extreme
plastic surgery.

So although I’m aware that
it’s physically impossible for me

to be a glamazon (and let me be
clear, it’s not something I want
to pursue—it seems exhausting),
I haven’t been immune to
society’s concept of hegemonic
beauty. I was more enthusiastic
about pursuing traditional
beauty in my youth—however
unskillfully or unsuccessfully—
but I can’t say I’m unaware of
the Rosie Huntington-Whitleys
of the world today.

I’m not as aggressive as I
could be in the moulding of my
appearance. I no longer actively
pursue skin cancer through
exposure to sunlight and the
cultivation of a tan: I've waved
that white flag and surrendered
to the fact that I’m Pale4Life.
Still, I spend a substantial
amount of time applying
makeup, damaging my hair
into some form of submission,
and working on getting a lithe
figure.

I don’t think all this time
and energy spent on appearance
is good, but I don’t think my
vanity detracts from me as a
feminist, either. It certainly
wouldn't make me less of a
woman if I chose to denounce
my preening and polishing—I
have the parts to prove it.

Besides which, I like to
see an aspect of feminism
as questioning the idea that
women are mono-faceted. I’m
friends with plenty of women
who challenge the assertion
that women can only be smart
or beautiful, but never both;

why shouldn’t contemporary
feminists call into question the
idea that feminists cannot be
vain? I know that it would be
easier to let my face, hair, and
body go, but it’s frankly not a
look that I could pull off.

The problem is not so much
the fact that I, as a feminist, care
about my appearance. It’s the
fact that, as a woman, there’s a
limit to what I can accept about
myself and still be considered
attractive. These ideas of beauty
change all the time—just in
the last hundred years, we’ve
experienced bodacious curves,
boyish frames, fitness mania,
and heroin chic—but they act
as a girdle, cinching in the parts
that would otherwise flow freely
and naturally. That’s what the
battle should be: not the pursuit
of beauty, but the representation
of only one, very limiting, form
of beauty.

There’s something to
be said about challenging
the hegemonic image of
beauty, if not denouncing
it entirely. Especially when
what is considered beautiful
is impossible for many or
seriously damaging physically,
mentally, and emotionally,
there’s a huge problem. Like the
understanding that skinny is the
only kind of acceptable beauty:
I eat healthily the majority of
the time and I work out (almost)
regularly, but I like to eat, and
I’d like to see the person that’s
going to take away my cake.

What's an apology anymore?

Meaningless apologies
are on the rise

By Grant Crossley, Contributor

erriam-Webster’s Online
Dictionary defines an
apology as:

1. A formal justification

2. An admission of error or
discourtesy accompanied by an
expression of regret

3. A poor substitute

Have you noticed that there
are a lot of people apologizing
lately? Take a look at the
newspaper or a TV newscast
and you’re bound to find an
apology: the government
recently apologized for the loss
of student loan files; back in

16

November, the Bank of Montreal
apologized for an outage that
shut down their system, leaving
customers in the dark; in
January, TReO, the company in
charge of the Port Mann Bridge,
apologized for not having the
roads salted enough during
some cold weather. Do any of
these apologies make you feel
any better? Well, they don’t
make me feel better, and I’ve
had it.

Let's look at the flip side:
take the government of Canada,
for instance. Pretend that ]
owed the government some
money on my taxes. What do
you think would happen if I
lost my tax forms? Would I]
be allowed to just phone up
1-800-O-CANADA and offer an
apology? The answer I would
get is, “Sorry Sir, you still owe
us.”

Let’s say I went to the bank

and told them that I forgot to
pay my student line of credit.
Once again, I might offer an
apology, yet I'd be dinged
with—you guessed it—a
penalty.

Pretend that I accidentally
crossed the Port Mann Bridge:
perhaps I was in the far lane,
and traffic was so bad that I
couldn’t get over to my exit.
Maybe I wasn’t used to the new
signs, or maybe | was changing
the radio station. I might contact
TReO and apologize for crossing
the bridge so they could waive
the fee, but guess what: they
wouldn't really care, and I'd still
be stuck paying the toll.

So what gives? Why am I
supposed to willingly accept
apologies with no financial gain,
yet when the tables are turned |
get penalized? Does this make
any sense whatsoever?

I think we have a

 

I’m Italian, and my ethnicity is
as clear as the nose on my face.
Do I care about my Italian nose?
No. Especially not when being
Italian is part and parcel to
amazing food.

Limiting concepts of what
people can and can’t be are
completely unrealistic. We're
generally multifaceted, and
trying to compress ourselves to

fundamental issue with the
definition of an apology. We
need to get down to the root of
what it means, although this
may have already been done. |
typed the word “apologies” into
Academic Search Complete and
it came up with 879 results, 610
of which were peer reviewed.

If, as in the dictionary,
it really is an admission of
error, then these mistakes
should never happen again.
The problem is that they do:
the government will lose files
again, BMO will have a system
glitch again, and TReO will find
another defect on the Port Mann
Bridge. How many apologies are
the public going to accept before
something changes?

I don’t know about you,
but apologies don’t mean
anything to me anymore. If you
make a mistake with me, you’d
better bring your wallet. The

 

 

slip into the one-dimensional
mould will oftentimes be an
unsuccessful endeavour. The
problem here is that beauty is
only represented in one form,
and women attempt to flatten
themselves to fit that mould.
Being a feminista is not an
oxymoron, and to think that it is
ignores what the real problem is.

fact that I have to pay for my
mistakes means that everybody
else should, as well. Once I
stop getting charged, and start
having my apologies accepted,
I may change my mind. But I
don’t see this happening for a
very long time.

I will now offer my
apologies for you reading this
article and realizing that you’ve
been taken for a fool by big
businesses and the government.
Try giving them a taste of their
own medicine, that phone will
hang up pretty quickly—trust
me, I've tried it.

PS: Don’t forget to vote
in May: we need a new
government and a whole new
set of apologies for not doing
what was promised.