Can’t pay for the gym

Can’t afford to not workout

By Eric Wilkins, Staff Writer

o you want to get fit but can’t
Gin the dough to grab a gym

membership? Tuition and
living expenses already adding far
too much to your ever-increasing
student debt? Well, you needn’t
worry because, physical exertion/
pain aside, there is a way to be fit
without paying anything. Here are
a few mind-numbingly obvious
things you can do outside the gym
for free!

The most common piece

of equipment at the gym is the
treadmill. In a colder climate I
could understand the need to stay
indoors, but here in beautiful British
Columbia there is really no excuse.
Aside from our token (and typically

brief) snowfall every year, the great
outdoors are always a viable option.
You will find that, whether you are
a runner or a walker, exercising
will be a good deal more enjoyable.
Nothing against those who prefer
to stare at the boob tube, but I find
it immensely more satisfying to run
down a greenery-lined path with
nothing but the sounds of nature
(and music blaring from an iPod).
Get outside!

Stairmaster freak? Again with
the obvious here, but, stairs! Just
like in all those Under Armour
commercials and inspirational
sports movies, make use of one of
man’s finest climbing creations. You
don’t even need a whole staircase
of them; one or two is all that’s
necessary. Go hard at it and you'll

Life&Style.

discover that you get a workout
that’s just as good—if not better—
than whatever can be had on one
of those expensive and sweaty
machines.

My last note on cardio is the all-
time classic: jump rope. While the
initial reaction of the uninformed
is to guffaw loudly while picturing
a grown adult skipping like a
little girl, the “after” picture is
significantly different. Skipping is
an exhausting activity. Continuous
small hops combined with constant
arm movement is fast recipe for
sweating profusely. Don’t pass on
this one; skip!

Next, let’s talk strength
exercises. The body knows what
it can handle, and you can always
handle yourself. Thus, push-ups

and sit-ups are the perfect training
routine. While it takes a long time
and a ton of work to get buff off
of these exercises, you will get
stronger. If you get bored with
it, try speeding it up or throwing
in a clap between every one; this
is the one and only time that it is
acceptable to do a seal impression.

Finally, although a small
price tag is attached, consider
investing in an exercise ball. There
are a billion and a half possible
applications, but the most simple is
just balancing on it. It'll do wonders
for your core and increase your
chances of making it to the circus
one day.

Welcome to the world of fitness
and frugality. Broke muscle-men
everywhere applaud your efforts.

 

In praise of the impractical mother

By Aubri Galano

certain expectations that when

I am a mother, people will be
forgiving of my lack of fashionable
attire. | assume that rearing children
takes a certain amount of effort
and doesn’t leave much time for
stylish outfits. That is why I am
particularly fond of the impractical
mother. I call her this because,
for all intents and purposes,
certain wardrobe choices are not
practical, but she chooses style over
practicality.

I was sitting on the bus, barely
awake, when a mother strolled
on, holding her two-year-old son’s
hand. This was no ordinary mother.
She was wearing black shiny
stilettos, which made her at least
three inches taller than her already
daunting six-foot stature, and
forced her to hunch over to be able
to hold her son’s hand. She gripped
a Grande Starbucks cup in her
other French-manicured hand with
a chestnut leather clutch tucked
under her arm.

Selflessly, she allowed her son
to take the last empty seat and
she stood by, answering the polite
questions of the elderly man in
the window seat beside the boy.
Standing started to become difficult
for her as the jarring of the bus was
particularly bad that morning. She
took the seat and put her son on her
lap. While doing so, her son lost a
shoe; without missing a beat, she
scooped it up and put it back on
with her free hand.

[« not a mother, but I have

That’s when I noticed the rest
of her outfit. She had on a grey
above-the-knee python print dress,
a black button-up blazer and a
dark grey scarf. Her nylons were
without holes and the only visibly
unkempt thing about her was the
barely noticeable brunette roots
poking through short light auburn
hair. She had dangling silver-plated
tassel earrings and skilfully applied
make-up, which highlighted her
hazel eyes and shapely cheek bones.

She looked ready to conquer
the world.

I took all this in within a few
seconds, and | sat there trying to
imagine why this mother and son
were on the bus. My question was
soon answered; her car had broken
down, but she’d promised her son
they would go to the Vancouver
Aquarium. The bus and SkyTrain
turned into bonuses on the trip.
Now, I was still confused on her
reason behind the attire, but no one
argues with a woman’s clothing
choices.

Her son wore jeans, runners,
and a cute blue-and-red sports
jacket. He was well-behaved and
enjoyed saying hello to everyone
on the bus with a giant smile. It
seemed as though he was having a
wonderful time simply being alive.

I had to applaud her for
being the impractical mother and
choosing to look awesome. Her
son, from all appearances, looked
well taken care of. So, why couldn’t
she wear an outfit that flatters her
figure to the aquarium? Fish like to
see nice things, too.

 

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