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They were always the cutest couple

By Angela Espinoza,
Arts Editor

L* week it was
announced that
Disney had officially
bought Lucasfilm for
an apparent sum of
$4.05 billion. The only
thing that shocked me
about this news though
is how people have
been reacting to it.

I have to wonder if
people were just unaware
of Disney’s hand in each
of the Lucasfilm fran-
chises up to this point.
While they may not have
always been a direct
part of the filmmaking,
they were definitely
part of the marketing

afterwards. Basically,
one would’ve needed to
be under a rock to not
realize how close the
Walt Disney Company
was with George Lucas.
For another fact,
Lucas got everything we
wanted out of Star Wars
as far as this bystander
is concerned. Yes, the
franchise was his baby,
his everything for a point
of his life. But much
like the shitty parents of
Toddlers & Tiaras, Lucas
decided that baby was
nothing unless it was
his idea of perfection.
The films have been
mercilessly tampered
with as technology has
gotten better, and at this
point, there’s not much

Life&Sty
DETWEEN

wy

Rock you like a
hurricane

By Viv Steele,
Sexual Climatologist

arly last week,

Hurricane Sandy
was sweeping over
the Atlantic, devastat-
ing eastern states and
provinces and laying
waste to developing
nations like Haiti and
Cuba. When Sandy
touched down in New
York City, I was busy
touching down on my

10

THE
EET S

own personal weather
systems. Specifically, the
very special hurricane
that takes place inside
when one engages in

my favourite kind of

sex: sex with an ex.
When you breakup

with someone, like I

did about a month ago,

there’s very little warn-
ing. You might have been
thinking about it, but you
might not be exactly sure
when it’s going to hap-
pen. You can’t know if
this movie you’re watch-
ing cuddled up on the

couch will be your last;

left he could do to them.

Obviously there have
been other projects made
under the Lucasfilm
Limited company, but
seeing as Disney’s first
bit of movie develop-
ment news has involved
Star Wars, that’s what
everyone seems to be
messing their pants over.

I like the Star Wars
movies as much as the
next guy, that is to say a
lot, but I also don’t care
it’s being rebooted. I’m
glad it’s being rebooted;
done right—think of
all the awesome things
they could do with that
galaxy far, far away!

I’m assuming the
negative reaction has
largely been caused by

C.

you can’t know if this is
the last time you'll fall
asleep next to each other.
Whatever catalyst spurs
you to end things (or
makes your partner want
to call it off with you)
will hit you on your weak
side when you're not
expecting it, like a foul
ball or an intense, ocean-
born tropical storm.
That’s the tragic thing
about breakups, and
also what makes it so
tempting to double-dip.
It’s also why ex sex can
be so passionate. You're
making up for lost time.
Now you know this
could be the last time,
and you want to do it
on your own terms. You
know your ex’s body
like a well-worn map
and you're just itching
to explore all those side-
trails again. The sex that
results from banging
your former lover is
usually an athletic affair;

a feeling of betrayal.
Betrayal by the man
who made, to drop an
obvious reference, Han
shoot first? Really?
Come on guys, you're
better than that.

If anything, I’m
intrigued to see if Disney
takes advantage of the
other films it now owns
from this purchase,
which include Willow
(1988), The Land Before
Time (1988), and maybe
most interesting of
all, Labyrinth (1986).

Am I excited one of
the largest, stereotypi-
cally evil businesses in
the world now owns a
little more of, well, the
world? Hell no, but,
look at all the good that

you touch on everything
that used to make you
tick, you try to hit up
every sexual position you
used to like, leaving no
doggy unstyled and no
missionary left behind.
It’s a hot, sweaty mess,
but it’s the devil’s candy.

For a self-proclaimed
emotional junkie like me,
the flash flood of feelings
that surges forth after a
fraught liaison can be a
positive thing. I’m not
saying that’s an emotion-
ally healthy way to be,
but there’s something
good to be said about
visceral emotions. The
key to keeping your
psyche safe in navigating
the treacherous waters
of sex-with-an-ex is
an awareness of your
emotional needs, and the
communications skills
required to be honest
about those needs.

If you feel like you’re
being pressured into hav-

came out of Disney
getting a hold of Pixar. I
don’t think the Star Wars
franchise is anymore
doomed than what Lucas
himself inflicted on the
series, which is maybe
why I’m so indifferent
to the issue; it literally
cannot get any worse.
That said, I am still
curious to see where
this all goes. If nothing
else, much like what
happened with Disney
and The Nightmare
Before Christmas (1993),
I would be down for a
little more Land Before
Time and Labyrinth
merch in the world,
that’s for damn sure.

ing sex with your ex and
it’ll be too difficult for
you: don’t do it! If you
feel like your ex still has
strong feelings for you
and is trying to spark a
relationship reboot: don’t
do it! Be very clear about
what the score is and
where you both stand, in
regards to your previous
breakup, as well as this
exciting new chapter in
your lives. If you both
have an itch that needs to
be scratched and you feel
ready to do so, I see no
reason not to. So board
up the windows, stock up
on supplies, and wait out
the hurricane together.