fipril 7, 2004 Opinions ¢ the other press © Dear Telus: What A & Tangled Web We Weave LIKE WORKING WITH PEOPLE? yo ee CT RING x fo oe Do you have a 3.0 average and desire to help other students do well in their courses? Do you want to work ina dynamic, flexible environment that is in the same building as your classes? Ted Morrison OP. Contributor Well, well, well, me hearties. Let's sum up the action taken on Telus so far. November 2003: I ask the Telus online directory for all entries in their category “Musical Instrument Shops” within 200km of Vancouver. The directory responds, informing me that there are none. I beg to dif- fer, in writing, to the complaints department via the email link on Telus’ own web page. November 2003 + a day or two: Into my inbox comes my complaint letter to Telus—not answered, but bounced. That is, the complaint let- ter I sent Telus, from a Telus page, was bounced by a Telus server as “address unrecognized.” I laugh hol- lowly and write the first “Dear Telus” piece. January 2004: Upon my arrival home from Xmas holidays, I discov- er that the chairman of Telus has included in the envelope containing my monthly bill, a sincere letter, full of shame and pain, about the lousy service Telus customers have been receiving. Feeling Mr. Entwistle’s pain, I write hima letter explaining that he can expiate his guilt by sim- ply returning $63 (about one month's worth of my phone bill) to me at the above address, and thank- ing him for the depth and sincerity of his contrition. This experience I incorporate into “Dear Telus” episode II. February 2004: Mr. Entwistle has a friendly fellow from the Telus head office call me. This nice guy explains how they'd love to refund my dough, but it’s illegal, due to regula- tions put in place by Big Brother—I mean the CRTC. About the same time: I write to the CRTC to let them know their foul ruse has been discovered. A very nice lady writes me back the follow- ing day, asking for clarification. After explaining the situation in complete and utter honesty (I’m asking for a refund not because my service has been any shittier than the usual Telus standard, but because they say they're so very sorry with- out really meaning it), I get a mes- sage from the CRTC stating that there is no reason why Telus cannot issue me a refund “for any amount, including $63” or for any reason. This information is loyally compiled into “Dear Telus” mark III. March 2004: I write back to Mr. Entwistle, asking him to quote me the chapter and verse wherein the bad ol’ CRTC says I can’t have my refund—which brings us to the most recent happening. On March 18 I got a phone message from one Bonnie Anderson at Telus corporate HQ. Ms. Anderson, understandably not familiar with my case, apparent- ly read my letter and concluded, “Tm not sure what you're asking for.” It’s like this, Ms. A: I am asking for my $63 back. Failing that, I want you to show me where it is written down that Telus cannot, nay—must not, give me this refund. I placed a call to the Alberta head- quarters of Telus today—but it turns out Ms. A only gets in at 10am. So I left a message. Privately I’ve decided that if they stall me again this time, I will up my demand to $126. That's a lot less than the value of the time I’ve wasted being jerked around by Telus. It’s now 9:30 am BC time—10:30 am Telus (AB) time. Obviously Ms. Anderson must be fairly high up in Telus, because she’s not exactly get- ting a wiggle on to get back to little ol’ me, is she? Actually—ir’s now llam two days later—I’ve aged a year in the interval (my birthday was Monday). I’ve left a new message telling Ms. A. that she can call me tomorrow whenever she gets in. Thursday March 25: Triumph! I have conquered the monster Telus Corporation! Having not heard back from Ms. Anderson in several days I called again today. She answered her own phone. I explained exactly what had taken place, and quoted the words of the Telus rep I'd talked to earlier, “It would be illegal” to refund me my $63. Instead of temporizing, Ms. Anderson responded with, “It isn't, of course. That person total- yan In a warm rush of good feeling, I spared her having to say, “lied.” Ms. Anderson explained that I was not entitled to a refund for defective service (which I have admitted before). I stated that I did not seek the refund for that reason—I just wanted Darren Entwistle to return one twelfth of the $756 I was charged for what the “president, CEO, and proud member of the Telus team” himself called “substan- dard service” over the last year. “Each customer has to be looked at as an individual,” I was told (which I assume is code for “the squeaky wheel gets the grease”). Ms. Anderson has said that she will refund my money by the goodwill credit mechanism—built into Telus for exactly these sorts of cases. The $63 will be subtracted from my next bill. It truly restores my faith in the company to know that basically, any sufficiently pissed-off customer can get their money back from Telus at Telus’ discretion. Provided they're willing to write a few letters. Will there be a fifth “Dear Telus” installment? I get my next bill around the April 10. I'd ding them for the time I’ve spent being talked to, and sometimes grossly lied to, by them, for the time writing to the CRTC, and for the hours I spent writing letters and OP pieces. But $63 is 36 beers. What the hell, it’s a victory, and for the most part—it’s been fun! Apply now at Centre for more information. Come tutor at the LEARNING CENTRE! We are looking for people like you to join our team for the Summer Semester starting in May. www.workopoliscampus.com, and come by The Learning YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE! bf of" http://www.otherpress.ca ¢ Page 9