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Contact: Sharon Miki, Humour Editor

4 humour@theotherpress.ca

www.theotherpress.ca

 

Nightmare of a nuisance

» Sleepwalking causes rash of ruinous roommates, lack of public sympathy

Natalie Serafini
Editor-in-Chief
M editor
@theotherpress.ca

 

Fons the viral story
about a girl whose
sleepwalking led to consuming
all her roommates’ food,

an increasing number of
roommates have been self-
diagnosed with sleepwalking.
Their destructive behaviour
has varied widely, from eating
everything, to borrowing

asking, and using up the toilet

more.

“It’s really hard, because
I don’t want to borrow my
roommate’s new shirt and
then spill red wine on it, but
the sleepwalking made me,”
lamented sleepwalking victim,

: Sarah Slumbers.

Slumbers added that

: it has seriously affected

: her relationship with her

: housemate. “She just isn’t very
: sympathetic to my sleepwalking :
: problem, even though I
: explained it to her several times. :
: [havea condition, andI looked :
: better in the shirt than she did,
: anyways. Ugh, she’s so selfish!”

Other roommate

: relationships have suffered
: the affects of this nocturnal
: condition, causing some to
without asking, stealing without contemplate in the aticy
: Lower Mainland. Tom Tired
paper and then forgetting to buy : toida harrowing story of his

: sleepwalking problem.

“I was sleepwalking, and I

guess I set fire to my roommate’s
: bed while I was smoking—I

: don’t even remember, but I

: guess I didn’t want to get smoke
: in my own room because my

: friend, and she came home to

: open while sleepwalking to get
: ice cream, and her cat ran away. :
: When I sleepwalked back home, :
: I tried to explain to her that I

: girlfriend doesn’t like the smell.
: Anyways, my roommate was

: super pissed. I tried to tell him

: it was my sleepwalking, but he

: wouldn't listen! Now not only

does he want me to buy hima

: new bed, he’s started talking

about moving out.”
An organization of

: sleepwalking activists, :
: Sleepwalkers Helping to Inform :
: and Teach (SHIT), is trying :
: to increase awareness of and

: support for sleepwalkers.

: Founder Danielle Dormer has
: gone through enough tough

: roommate situations that she’s
: familiar with the sleepers’

: struggle.

“T was living with my best

find that I had left the door

 

: wasn’t conscious, but she just
: didn’t understand—I guess I

> wasn’t totally coherent, between :
: the sleeping and the mouthful
: of ice cream. I knew right then
: that something had to change,
: and I formed SHIT the very next

: day,” Dormer said. :

 

Until roommates

: everywhere open their hearts,

doors, and refrigerators

to sleepwalkers and their
: problems, Dormer and her band
> of nappers will continue to fight

for understanding and funding.

 

Move over, manspreading;: there's a
new agent of patriarchy in town

» What this activity says about men in our society

Pete Treearchy
The Peak

here are few places as prone

to displays of bullshit male
entitlement as public transit.
Whether it’s an overcrowded
bus, a SkyTrain car, or even the
SeaBus, they’re all incubators
for patriarchy—and that’s
never been more evident than
it is today.

First, there was
manspreading: the act in which
a male boasts an exorbitant
amount of empty space
between his legs, effectively
spreading patriarchy and
taking up more room than
he needs to ina public area.
Someone is manspreading if
he ignorantly occupies more
than one seat with his spread-
eagle legs, perhaps wanting to
leave extra room for his ego to
breathe. It’s an act that Jezebel
once called “somehow both
annoying and hilarious.”

But now, there’s an even
bigger threat to equality
between the sexes: we need

: to talk about the societal
: epidemic of manlaying.

What is manlaying?

: Picture this: you step onto

: a bus, tired from spending

: your day fighting to eliminate
: sexism in the office and

: demanding the same respect
: as your co-workers who just

: happened to be born with a

: scrotum. You glide towards

: the back of the bus, hoping

: to score a seat for the long

: commute home when you see
: it: three men, all laying face

: up across three different rows
: of seats. The patriarchy has

: spoken, and you have to stand
: for the next 45 minutes.

You've never noticed

manlaying in public spaces?

: That doesn’t surprise me.

: We've become so desensitized
: to these sorts of masculine

: antics that we don’t even

: register them as a problem

: anymore. We accept them

: as just another facet of our :
: society and continue about our :
: day, ignorant that injustice is
laying—or manlaying—right

: before our eyes.

But manlaying isn’t just

: about a man taking up five

: seats at once while riding the
: bus; it’s not about having to

: stand while someone who

: earns more money for the

: same work, lies completely

: horizontal in front of you.

: It’s an indication of a larger,

: systemic issue that tells us we
: shouldn’t take up a quarrel

: with this.

I’m labelled as abrasive

when I kindly ask a man to not
: lie across a row of chairs. I’m

: considered unladylike to speak
: my mind and want to enjoy

: the same worn-out TransLink

: cushioning that my male

: counterparts feel entitled to.

: Where is the fairness in that?

Remember these plights

the next time someone asks

: you if the world still needs

: feminism. Remember that

: it’s not abrasive to want to lie
: across an entire row of seats

yourself. Don’t let patriarchy

: manlay over your rights as a
: woman and as a human being.

 

 

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