life & style // no. 12 The pancakes on the table >» New IHOP dishes inspired by a Christmas classic Jerrison Oracion Senior Columnist D uring each holiday season, IHOP offers a special menu which features new pancakes to promote a new holiday film. This year—perhaps because there are not a lot of holiday films to inspire a dish— THOP decided to create dishes based on a very popular Christmas book (and meme). In the featured book, The Elf on the Shelf, Santa Claus sends his elves to houses around the world to check on children and to find out if they are naughty or nice. The elves report back to jolly old Saint Nick at the North Pole and determine the naughty or nice list. The book includes an elf doll that you can place around the house so that kids will behave for Christmas. Saturday Night Live spoofed the book; the skit included Jason Momoa playing an elf who continually checked on the same child until they became a teenager. The recent check-up with the teen turns disturbing to the elf. The Elf on the Shelf menu has pancakes that look like Santa’s elves snuck inside the kitchen at IHOP to make these festive tasty breakfasts. There are two main dishes on the menu and J ate one of them. The Jolly Cakes are their signature buttermilk pancakes coloured green with cream cheese icing, whipped cream on top, and elf sprinkles that look as dazzling as the ornaments on a Christmas tree. While it is similar to IHOP’s other featured pancakes, this pancake is very soft and fluffy. I am not sure what other ingredients they put inside it to make the pancake look green. The cream cheese icing makes the pancake more festive, and the elf sprinkles are crunchy and taste like holiday spirit. If you are not a fan of pancakes, there are the Oh What Funnel Cakes—two funnel cakes dusted with icing sugar and topped with strawberries, whipped cream, and elf sprinkles. Both dishes can be included with their breakfast combos, which also include eggs, bacon, or sausage, or thick-cut ham, and hash-browns. They also have a special drink called the Merry Marshmallow Hot Chocolate which is pretty much just hot chocolate with whipped cream and the elf sprinkles. Like in the book where The Elf on the Shelf encourages everyone to spread some good joy, do the same for your stomach at your local IHOP during the holiday season. Poopin around the city » Where to go when you gotta go fan thee clip! CC You have to take part in society's greatest equalizer; you need to poop. And to pour right, eee bl Te ee ea ( OoOOo000Hhhbh... head about finding a bathroom that’s private—one that is a single room with a toilet and sink in it. Don’t hold your breath on this. Those bathrooms are hard to find, and ina lot of cases, in poor condition. They normally appear in food establishments such as McDonald’s and Safeway, and in my experience, such restrooms do not seem to bea high priority for the staff in terms of cleaning. These bathrooms can work ina pinch, but they should only be used in the worst-case scenario. To me, such bathrooms often come off like the bathroom in the Saw series of movies. Dark, disgusting, and low on supplies. Some even put blue lightbulbs in them for some reason. There’s no way these are black lights, because that should light up Illustration by Janis McMath Craig Allan Staff Writer ell, it’s happening. You're in downtown Vancouver, you've just finished a big extra spicy burrito from La Taqueria, and the feeling hits you. You have to take part in society’s greatest equalizer; you need to poop. The problem is your laboratory of business—including your porcelain throne, fancy hand soap, and multiple layered toilet paper—is far away in the suburbs. You won't make it far; you have to go now. You must find relief in the public toilets. With this helpful guide, you will find the proper toilet to do your business—wherever you are. First, there may be a thought in your the entire place by how the bathroom works so why it is blue is an anomaly. Sure, a well-attended to private bathroom can be great—but it is not something to hope for in the city. When searching for a bathroom, the place to go are the hotels. Hotels often have very fancy bathrooms for public use. Using one of them feels like you are entering the theotherpress.ca Image via IHOP seat of luxury. The walls are marble, and the bathrooms are generally cleaned often. There is one aspect of these bathrooms that’s not so great though, and that’s the privacy. For some reason, bathrooms in hotels often have doors that have see- through blinds. The locks also look like a standard screw in the wall... and if you don’t understand how to use them, it is unfortunately easy for someone to open the door on you. If these are not an option for you, consider getting creative. There are many places that you may not think have public bathrooms. Some clothing stores like Mark’s Work Warehouse, Best Buy, and Old Navy sometimes have bathrooms for customers. In my experience, these are normally bathrooms that are single- unit facilities. Because not a lot of people know that these bathrooms are there, it seems that these restrooms are often very underused. Just don’t count on these though, as in my experience these bathrooms can be hit or miss. This is due to stores either not having them or designating them for customers only. Such bathrooms may not be the cleanest depending on who has used it last, but they may be the best option for the truly private throne you need for all of your games of goings. Using a public bathroom is never fun, but hopefully this guide will help in the pursuit of the best stall for the devil’s business. Just be glad that Canada is a country that does not charge for public bathrooms like many European nations do. The thought of having to use a bathroom that is not only poor quality but also one you had to pay for is a sad reality that many other nations must face. So, thank you Canada, for letting us poop without taxation!