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(¥Y The before time of Instagram

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And more!

Low concert ticket sales 1n direct
correlation to popularity of Snapchat

> Many content with just viewing live shows through stories

Chandler Walter
Humour Editor

 

oncert sales in Vancouver

have hit an all-time
low over the past few years,
and scientists are only now
discovering the causation.

“Tt appears that the main
cause has been the use of

Snapchat by concert-going youth,”

said UBC scientist Stan Chap.
Chap has been working on the
cause and effects of Snapchat
in society over the past two
years, and has an entire team of
scientists, geniuses, and brainiacs
working with him in the lab.
“This is the discovery
of a lifetime,” Chap said.
Through thousands of tests
and intricate determinations,
Chap’s team found that Snapchat
had been directly affecting
concert attendance ever since
the Snapstory was introduced
to the photo sharing app.
“Tt appears that many
young people are more than
happy with just seeing a live
concert through the Snapstories

of their friends in the crowd,”
Chap explained, “and would
rather save their money than
experience the event in person.”
Chap was proved right at the
latest Daughter concert, where
many people in the crowd were

watching the show through the
screens of their iPhones. When
asked how much of the concert
ticket price her Snapchat friends
were paying to enjoy the concert
as well, attendee Jessica Rhodes
said that she just “did it for fun.”

 

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“I doubt anyone from my
Snapchat would pay me money
for the stories I put up,” Rhodes
stated during Daughter’s “Youth.”
“But I’m sure they are all enjoying
them. Just a second, this is her
most popular song, I need to

Man followed home from bus stop

> Local police do not believe there was any cause for alarm

Chandler Walter
Humour Editor

 

nashocking series of events,
local bus rider Pete Ryder
had the fright of his life last
Wednesday, after being followed
home from his bus stop.

The follower in question is
an unnamed, hoodie-wearing
male standing around six
feet four inches and weighing
approximately 200 lbs.

Ryder said that the man
had been staring at him on the
bus the entire ride, ever since
he had gotten on from the stop
outside the restaurant that he
works at. Ryder had avoided
making eye contact with the
suspect, but said that the man
in question had moved seats
to sit closer to Ryder half way
through the bus ride.

“It was like he was trying to
get close enough to smell me,”
Ryder said. “It was so creepy.”

As Ryder left the bus, he

stated in an interview to the
RCMP shortly after the encounter,
the suspect had gotten up and
slipped off as well, though had
previously made no intention
that this was his stop until
Ryder had motioned to get off.

“I knew something was

   

off at that point,” Ryder said.
Ryder then proceeded
to speed-walk the half-
kilometre to his home, being
too frightened to look back or
make a confrontation, as the
man towered over him by at
least half a foot and could have

Image via thinkstock

been concealing a weapon.

“By the time I made it
home and locked my door
behind me I was practically
sprinting,” Ryder said. “I had
never been so scared in my life.
This just really isn’t something
that usually happens, right?”

record and share this entire
thing in 10-second increments.”

One of Rhodes friends,

Ben Liverson, had also enjoyed
the concert, though from the
comforts of his own living room.

“Oh yeah, that’s why I love
having Jessica on Snapchat,
she’s always going out and doing
these fun things, and we all get
to bea part of it!” he said.

While Liverson is sad that
he didn’t get to see as much
of the show as he would have
liked (apparently a reporter
had interrupted Rhodes from
Snapchatting the entirety of
the concert), he said that it was
well worth the $0 that he paid.

“I love seeing concerts. I’ve
seen Justin Bieber, Taylor Swift,
a little bit of Miley Cyrus. And at
most of these events I get to watch
from so many different angles, it’s
almost as if | experienced more
than if I had actually gone”

Liverson said that he doesn’t
care much for the quality of
sound that Snapchat videos
provide for these concerts, as he
just likes to be able to show off
how many bands he has seen.

Ryder immediately called
gu, though was surprised by
the response he received.

“They started asking
questions about me,” Ryder said
in an interview. “I was trying to
tell them what this guy looked
like, but they kept asking if I was
drunk, or what I was wearing.”

The police investigation
eventually was called off due to
the man being too unidentifiable,
but they gave Ryder a piece
of advice to protect him from
this ever happening again.

“Don’t ride the bus. You put
yourself at risk by riding the bus.
Don’t you know how dangerous
riding the bus is?” they explained
to him before they terminated
his case. Wearing more layers
of clothing to protect himself
from potential knife attacks was
another trick the police said
would help end the problem,
and they suggested that it was
somewhat Ryder’s fault for making
eye contact in the first place.