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And more!

Canadian Prime Minister backs Donald Trump

> Justin Trudeau throws his support to the Republican front runner

Jake Wray
Columnist

 

pir Minister Justin Trudeau
privately endorsed Donald
Trump’s campaign, according
to leaked audio of a phone call
between Trudeau and United
States President, Barack Obama.
The leak, sent to the Other
Press and other prominent
news outlets by an anonymous
whistleblower, consists of roughly
45 minutes of uncensored chatter
between the two world leaders.
The pair covered a wide array
of topics including Drake’s new
album, the NHL playoffs, and the
upcoming American election. At
one point, Trudeau can be heard

zany,” Trudeau said. “Sorry,
man, I know you're sensitive
about Republicans. He’s just
epic. He has bold ideas—he’s
such a character. If he gets
elected, the next four years are
going to be exhilarating. Who
knows what could happen?!”
Obama responded with a
chuckle, “Heh, yeah, I have to
admit that would be pretty dope.”
Trudeau’s comments are
being met with ire by pundits and
commentators across the political
spectrum. Beloved American
commentator Nancy Grace (“One
of television’s most respected
legal analysts,” according to her
website) proclaimed on her
show that Trudeau is a fraud.

 

and tries to fit in,” Grace said.
“You don’t even despise

Muslims, and it is an absolute

insult that you would express

Talon

Photo illustration

correspondent known for

his thoughtful and hard-

hitting political commentary,
published an uncharacteristically

  

Facebook group was created for
Canadians who are threatening
to move to America in protest.
At the time of writing,
approximately 75,000 people
have liked the group. Kevin
Copely, who created the group,
said people should head to
greener pastures immediately.
“This country is going
to the dogs,” Copely said.
“Trudeau’s transgressions
get worse by the day. When
marijuana is legalized, there
will be anarchy in the streets.
Please, people, for the sake of
your children, you must leave
at once. America is safe, clean,
and reasonable. Join me in my
journey to the land of the free.”
In a press conference

“What are you doing? Youre —_ fondness for Trump’s inspiring
not a part of this club. It’s weird, campaign. Are you doing
like when you want to hang this ironically, you dirty, pot-
out with your friends and then addled, Canadian hipster?”

short column in response
to Trudeau’s comments.
“O_@,” Macdonald wrote.
‘SOU OOD.”

saying he hopes Trump will win

the Republican primary and the

subsequent general election.
“My money’s on Trump. I

this morning, a CNN reporter
asked Trump for his response
to Trudeau’s comments.

mean, it would be pretty fucking

your little brother tags along

Neil Macdonald, a CBC

Following the leak, a

Breaking: Young adult goes travelling,
does not post to social media at all

> Modest traveller manages to enjoy trip without social reassurance

Chandler Walter
Humour Editor

 

H e went on the trip of a lifetime,
and enjoyed it solely from the
experiences he gained, the people
he met, and all the things he saw.

In a striking turn of events, 21-year-old
traveller Jack Thompson travelled across
the world and managed to keep everything
that he had done off of social media.

Thompson, a graduate of Pinetree
Secondary School, had decided to
go on extended vacation after saving
up enough money working at a local
coffee shop since graduating.

“I always knew I wanted to travel before
starting post-secondary,” Thompson said in
an email interview, “to really see the world
and figure out what it was that I wanted
to become. So | just started saving up.”

Thompson went on a half-year
excursion, during which he backpacked
across Europe, surfed in Australia,
partied in Thailand. He even disagreed
with the treatment of elephants as
transport vehicles, and the drugging
of lions in local zoos, but never
posted his feelings on the matters.

What was most astonishing about
Thompson’s entire experience was not
what he saw, but what he didn’t show. The
young man somehow spent the entirety of

his trip off of social media, even though he
had a working iPhone and full data plan.
“I just, | wanted to experience these
things for myself, not for anyone else,”
Thompson admitted. “If I decided to do
something during my trip, | didn’t want
how cool it would look on Instagram or
Snapchat to influence that decision.”
Thompson also admits that while
he did take many pictures on his trip,
he didn’t think that any of them were
all that interesting to people who did
not participate in the experience.
“Why would I post a picture of
the Eiffel tower? People know what it
looks like, and a picture taken from my
iPhone 5c will have nothing on some
of the amazing pictures that have been
taken of it professionally. I did take a
selfie with it in the background, but
that’s just so I can remember it.”
Thompson kept a journal during
his trip, documenting every where he
went and all the people that he met.
When asked if he was thinking about
turning his entries into blog postings,
Thompson explained that he had no
intentions of publicizing his experiences.
“I had a good enough time just being
there, just living it. My friends know that
I was there, and if they ask, I have some
pictures to show them, or some great
stories to tell them over beers. Doing it that
way just feels a bit more human, doesn’t it?”

  
 
 

“Who?” asked Trump.

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