the * BG Press Velume 22+ Issue 14-January 21, 1997 Room 1020-700 Royal Avenue New Westminster, BC V3L 5B2 general@op.douglas.be.ca Phone 525.3542 Fax 527.5095 or 525.3505 David Lam Office Room A3107 Phone 527.5805 he Other Pressis Douglas College's autonomous student REWSpape®, We've been publishing since 1976, The Other Press is run as an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take turns acting as sort of an executive officer for the week, but all the decisions of this officer must be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting, by a simple majority ‘in the case of purely internal affairs, but by a two thirds majority4n the ease of... The OP is published weekly during the fall and winter semesters and monthly [as a magazine] during the summer. The Other Press is made by Douglas College students. All DC students are welcome to join. (Bored, Lonely, creatively repressed, need something on your resume, or??? Come down to room 1020, We're usually friendly and we have lots of toys. No experience required.) We receive our funding from a student levy collected every semester at registration, and from local and national advertising revenue. The Other Press is a member of the Canadian University Press (CUP), a cooperative of student newspapers from across Canada. We, generally speaking, adhere to CUP’s Statement of Common Principles and Code of Ethics. The Other Press reserves the right to choose what to publish; however, we'll print most things, unless they're racist, sexist, homophobic, or really illegal. All opinions appearing in the Other Press are the responsibility of their creators and are not necessarily the opinions of all members of the Other Press. We try to believe in the freedom of the press. ‘We want you to be part of the publishing process, so when you submit a letter or article to us, include a way we can contact you. We realize that you've already spent a good deal of time preparing a submission, but typos happen, tenses change, participles dangle; we need to know if it is deliberate or if it was an error. Phone numbers are not published and pseudonyms are accepted. Everyone has an opinion, and we'd like to make sure yours is clear. Letters may be proofread, but are not edited except for length, Keep in mind that if you don't submit it on disk, some poor soul will have to type it for you. Athletics - Hamish Knox sports@op.douglas.bc.ca Arts & Entertainment ~ Elijah Bak a&e@op.douglas.be.ca Coquitlam ~ Lorenzo Sai, acting coq_coordinator@op.douglas.bc.ca CUP Liaison - Jonas Johnson cup@op.douglas.bc.ca Distribution ~ Geoff McDonald advertising@op.douglas.be.ca Features ~ Monique Tamminga, acting features@op.douglas.be.ca , News - Jim Chliboyko news@op.douglas.bc.ca Opinion/Editorial - Tom Laws opinions @op.douglas.bc.ca Photography - David Tam photo@op.douglas. bc.ca Production ~ Susanna Kong, acting production_co@op.douglas.bc.ca Systems Operator ~ Michael Pierre op_web@op. douglas. bc.ca Jason Kurylo, Johnson C.H. Tai, RG, Kevin Sallows, Jeremy Nelson, Meg Murphy, E.B., Trevor Hargreaves, Reverend Tom, Cathy Tam, Steve IsSane, Sam McDonough, Gweny Wong Advertising - John Morash ad@op.douglas. be.ca Bookkeeping - John Morash Production Resource - Trent Ernst production@op. douglas. be.ca Editorial Resource - Corene McKay ed_res@op.douglas, be.ca All materials appearing in the Orher Press are copyright their creators and may not be reproduced in any form without their creators’ express written consent. Move (. te = 'M OUT OF ToOWEr PAPER WHat am © SOTNeG To Bo? THANK Gooones. FoR THE otteg PRESS\ 00) maui Bright shiny colours dance off the ocean floor pearls of wisdom you say no more than you have to when that toothy iridescence gleams off your spattered shoulder It is warm and swishy as the sun blasts on the horizon. by Sam McDonough SHORT SToRY coMPETITION Thistledown Press’ latest competition for short fiction geared to a young adult audience (age 14 and up), must have humour as its main element. Deadline for submissions: March 30, 1998 Submission fee: $20 Age Limit: 14 to 18 Prizes: First Prize $1000 Runner Up $500 The authors of all other stories included in the resulting anthology will receive $200 each. For entry form and competition guidelines include a SASE and write to the address below: Thistledown Press 633 Main Street Saskatoon, SK, S7H 0J8 Tel. 306 244 1722 / Fax: 306 244 1762 Email: thistle@sk.sympatico.ca http:\\www.thistledown.sk.ca Crit — a? <~ ate jae is ws >y \ LOS T 1 ee eu) iw ty A 48 enaissance PAooks Buy ¢ Sell + Trade Show your DC student card and get 15% off. 525-4566 804 —12th Street New Westminster $$ fous Xe AS . ( THE CHARACTER REPRESENTED IN THIS Comic STRIP IS PURELY FICTIONAL, ANY LIKENESS TO PERSONS ALIVE OR DEAD IS PLRELY COINCIDE Phe... honest / Tam Pp Ask Reverend Tom He’ back, that font of ancient wisdom, revealer of universal mysteries and purveyor of kick-ass gyros. Questions can be directed to his holga at opinions @op.douglas.bc.ca, or to room 1020, New West campus Dear Reverend Tom: What is the single most prevalent question facing theologians today? Theodore Logos Dear Theodore: There are many questions such as “Does God exist in the realm of the tangible to humans, or is He more understandable as a metaphor for Jiffy Pop?” or “Would God create a man who gives cigarettes to trees?” But, the most hotly debated question theological circles is “If masturbating causes hair to grow on the palms of your hands, what the hell is Rogaine made of?” Dear Reverend Tom: I want to be a good God person, but I can’t until I know how He hangs his toilet paper in heaven. Escatologically Minded Individual Dear ‘Scat: Well, God is a very complex person to understand. Yet, the scriptures tell us that God hangs His toilet paper in the underhand fashion with the sheet hanging behind. Unlike those ungodly Atheists who hang it in the improper overhand fashion. Man, they are as lame as D&D gamers. God will give them all a bowel obstruction, mark my words. 2 January 21 1997 The Other Press