Two (Straight) Douglas College Wo Not That There s Anything Wrong With That Brandon Ferguson, News Editor o see Catherine Wilkins or Maggie Smith walking through the halls of Douglas College or taking a smoke break outside of the con- course, you'd probably want to kiss them anyway. It’s unlikely, however, that you would think to do it for nearly eight consecutive hours. But that’s exactly what these two Douglas students did for Valentine’s Day in a kissing contest held by The Beat radio station. Wilkins and Smith won the con- test, beating Stephen Harper-endorsed heterosexual couples, to take home over $5,000 and prizes. What makes their accomplishment all the more intriguing? They aren’t gay. “Definitely not,” said Wilkins (27), in her second year of the Financial Services Management the New Westminster campus. “I love men.” out four Program at In the week leading up to Valentine’s Day, The Beat was entering every ninth caller into the kissing contest. Monday through Thursday was reserved for the winners with significant others entered, and Friday was awarded to the singles. Wilkins was not one of the winners. “IT was actually making fun of it and didn’t expect to phone in,” recalled Smith (21), a student in the Dental Assisting Program. “But when I heard them say ‘call now to qualify, I was on my way out the door and thought ‘what the hell, [ll try it? “They asked if I would mind kissing a stranger and I said ‘no—as long as he brushes his teeth.’ Then they said ‘what if he turned out to be a she?” Smith was undaunted by the prospect of having to kiss a strange woman. She was even relieved. “IT was actually happy it was going to be a girl instead of a guy because there’s a lot more potential for creepiness with some guy I don’t know.” Wilkins heard about Smith’s opportu- nity to share a $5,000 top prize with a total stranger that Friday, and vowed to go with her for support. The two students were somewhat strangers themselves, hav- ing only made acquaintances outside in the Douglas smoke pit. “We actually talked about the possibility of the other girl not showing up, so I went down early for moral sup- port, and just in case she didn’t show,” said Wilkins. When the seemingly impos- sible inevitably happened, Wilkins 6 | www.theotherpress.ca immediately thought of her bladder. “My first reaction was, ‘I’ve had my morning coffee and I need to go pee. I had two minutes to run up three flights of stairs, signing waivers along the way.” Since their stunning and well-publi- cized victory, the two acquaintances-turned-intimate-friends have enjoyed a whirlwind of media atten- tion. Their faces, or, more accurately, kissing profiles the Vancouver Sun, television newscasts, and now the Other Press. When we sat down to talk, they had just finished a photo ses- sion with the Burnaby Now. Their making-out mugs are everywhere. In addi- have adorned tion to the press coverage there were also countless camera phones snapping away while they smooched in the storefront window of The Bay on the corner of Granville and Georgia. “All we’d see is people pulling their camera phones out and taking pictures, walking by, stopping, and then walking backwards to stand and stare,” said Wilkins. “In the beginning, there were two or three cameras there in the window with us, which was a little unnerving,’ Smith added. “But after a while, we just got used to it. We even had an elementary-school field trip walk by. That was strange.” Not all of the attention was favourable. “This one lady spat on the window and yelled at us in Portuguese,’ said Wilkins. “There was another lady who got really mad about us kissing, until our men Win Kissing Gontest One man took the time to write a sign that implored the two to “use more tongue.” friend [standing outside] told her that we'd win $5,000, and then the lady was like ‘Oh well, that’s okay then.’ So, it’s okay for us because we're straight and we’re entering a competition, but it’s not okay for [homosexual] people who love each other?” In many ways, the kissing contest has gained more attention because the women are straight than it would have had they been gay. There are countless men who now have Smith and Wilkins on their phones—‘“We were probably on the inter- net by noon,” joked Smith. One man took the time to write a sign that implored the two to “use more tongue.” A couple of geriatric gentlemen even inexplicably showed off condoms they had. But the preternatural male fascination with women kissing is contrasted sharply by those who vehemently oppose it—the woman who spat on the window, the tele- vision channel that only showed the women’s mouths kissing from the nose down, and the newspaper (the Province) that refused to run their picture at all. “In a lot of ways, I think it still shocks people,” said Wilkins. “IT won’t mind if my grandkids know about this someday, because I want them raised to know that things like that are okay and to not be homophobic—even though we’re not gay,” Smith added. “Our parents both thought it was really cool that we didn’t care what people thought and that we were willing to do that.” Social commentary aside, how the hell do you kiss for nearly eight straight hours? “I knew all the other couples would probably be making out,” said Smith. “So my strategy was, since only lips needed to be touching, to keep it that way and keep it simple and move as little as possible. The more you move, and the more pas- sionate the kissing, the more chance there is of your lips coming apart.” Keep it simple and move as little as possible. Okay, I can do this. “If things got too silly, we'd just close our eyes to focus and zone everyone out,” Smith added, “because sometimes we'd get the giggles.” The two sustained smooching by removing sensuousness from the sensa- tion and by chatting through the sides of their mouths. It is said you can learn a lot about a person from a kiss; Smith and Wilkins learned a lot about each other while they kissed. Through all the pain— “My calves kept cramping up and I just wanted to sit down,” said Smith—and all the temptation—“We didn’t get hungry, we didn’t have to pee, but we both really wanted a smoke”—these two Douglas College singles spent their Valentine’s Day locking lips and getting to know each other. Everyone should be so lucky. Asked where they would rank this Valentine’s Day, the response was unani- mous and enthusiastic, “Number one!” After the giggles subsided, Smith added, “I don’t think any Valentine’s Day will ever beat this one.” And there’s nothing wrong with that. FEBRUARY 23/2005