The R.C.M.P.

Kathy Riley

You probably never sus-
pected that your local
| RCMP oh ti he hee

re not just iron-
| ing the sheets but actually
utting the iron on the bed
o iron every last wrinkle
| out of it. And if Sarge’ flips
|a quarter on the pillow and
t doesn’t bounce, the bed
|gets torn apart and has to
lbe done over again.
Makes you feel safe,
doesn’t it?
| Yes, in those six crucial
| months when the RCMP re-
cruit gets shipped off to
|Regina for training, he
|learns more than you or |
| will ever learn—or ever
want to learn.
| He learns how to wax
| floors and keep his boots
| spit-polished. He’s taught
| | to. have a certain number of

hangers in his closet at all

times, with one empty
hanger to separate his civil
ian clothes from his uni-
forms. He’s taught to keep
his cool when someone
spits in his face or calls his
wife names, and if ‘Sarge’
wants him to squat down
and waddle around the bar-
racks quacking like a duck,
he does it.

More conventional stud-
ies, such as History, Crime
Prevention, and Speach-
making are also required.
Speachmaking is especially
interesting. The boys are
called upon to give im-
promptu speaches on con-
troversial subjects such as
‘Bellybutton Lint’ or ‘Why |
am so Beautiful’.

If you think all of this
sounds rather absurd—|!

agree. In fact, most RCMP

officers would probably

Now...more than ever
The Arsey em pee
wanis you

If you've ever considered a career in

agree. Such gruesome

training has been known to |

make grown men cry, and

even. the toughest Mounties |

admit they wouldn’t want
to go through it again.

Of course, the. purpose
behind such training all
boils down to ‘blind obedi-
ence’, an instrument used
very ‘effectively by King |
Frederick William | of Prus-
sia in the 1700’s. Fred was
known as the Sargent King |
and developed one of the
strongest, most respected
armies in Europe.

History may or may not
offer a sufficient explana-
tion, but you have to give
the boys in blue a lot of
credit. Anybody that will go
through six months of train-
ing, more bizarre than any
fraternity initiation, de-
serves respect. :

The Blind leading the blind? —

Td aok ae Ah

Question: Do you take Drugs?

Ely Popadopilus: | don’t
care anymore! !

Rob the Gee Gee: No.

 

law enforcement, now’s the time to talk
to the Royal Canadian Mounted Police.
The opportunities have never been
greater.
If accepted as a member of the
.Farce, you'll receive intensive training
in all aspects of police work. Then
you’ll be posted to a detachment where
there’s every chance to put your know-
leds ioiaents to work.
Cues opportunities are now open in:
ewire-tapping
red baiting
ebarn burning
*breaking and entering
esurveillance of PC’s
and other subversives
*cover-ups
estrikebreaking
Be proud of what you're doing for
yourself and for Canada as a member
sone of the finest police forces in the
world.

Mikey MacSkinflint:
Wot’s drugs?

Pat Worthless:
Woodstock, ‘68.
there.

 

Call or write
your nearest
office or use
the coupon.
We'd ee to tell

 

 

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