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My Ji
Tillie the Wunderqweer
For Liz E who never gave a damn.

Stuff

First of all, writing this article has been a
very difficult personal experience for me.
I've realized that even though I’ve been
out of the closet for years, I’m still
dealing with a lot of internal and
external issues about NOT BEING
STRAIGHT. Then I realized how
difficult it was to examine my experi-
ences about being queer, because it has
been part of my life and me. It’s not
something easily separated and dissected.

Although homosexuality may not be
considered the norm, it is NORMAL for
me and a lot of other people. It is part of
who you arg, your identity and personal-
ity. Also, I need to state that this has
been MY experience, and this is MY -
story. Everyone has their own story, and.
this is just one.

Earle Life

When I was a little girl, I didn’t fully
realize that I wasn’t straight. I was just
me. I believed that the two females
living next door were married, since they
were two adults living together. My
parents never gave me any indication
that this was NOT the case, or even that
this lesbian couple (which they were, as
were some of my later neighbours) was
odd in any way. They were just THERE.

 

€ a8 a Queer

In kindergarten, I got into an argument
with my classmates after another girl and
I stated we wouldn’t marry boys, but
girls. I thought it was possible, and
normal.

But everyone else, it was assumed that
I was heterosexual. All the messages I got
from TV, movies, my friends and most
of the people I knew led me to assume
that I would grow up liking boys, dating
boys, and perhaps marrying one and
having children. Basically, our predomi-
nantly heterosexual culture overrode my
earlier assumptions as to what was
normal. So, like most girls my age, we
discussed future husbands, our wed-
dings, and when we played house, one of
us was the “dad.” :

I must state, though, that I was not a
normal child. First of all, my parents
(wisely) raised me with very few biases. I
read a lot, I had “strange” ideas. I gained
weight, and by grade three, I was the
“fat” kid in the class, All this lead to my
eventual social isolation, which, yes,
does have something to do with “My
Life as a Queer.”

Puberty arid revelatioris
When I was 11, most girls were
developing an interest in boys. Pop stars
were cute, they began flirting and
developing crushes on boys at school. I
was very unpopular, fat and therefore,
undesirable, so I tended to avoid giggly

“cute boy” discussions. When other girls
did ask me who I liked, I usually said
“no one.” Mostly because the boys
tormented or ignored me. Also, because
they werent really that interesting. Sure,
some of them looked nice, or acted nice
sometimes, but that was it.

Around that period, I became aware
of the insults “faggot,” “gay,” “les(bo),”
etc. Since I was driven by a feeling that I
should fit in, I used them and con-
formed to the idea that being called one
of these things meant you were bad. So
actually being one must be worse! I was
developing hormones, and an interest in
sex. Sex ed was intriguing, of course. For
REAL information, though, I turned to
the “dirty” parts in books. My early sex
experiences all occurred from 10 PM to
2 AM, reading and fantasizing. As for
anything involving someone else....nada.

When I was 12 or 13, something
happened to my fantasies. Hormones?
Puberty? Curiosity? I call it the
Epiphany. Girls started becoming more
and more a part of my fantasies. Soon,
my fantasies often were exclusively about
girls. I was disturbed. Did this mean I
liked...girls...in that way? I was...a lesbo?
I was...even WEIRDER than now????
This shocked me. I tried to redirect my
thoughts towards boys. Sure, they were
great for a while. But the girls kept
coming back! They wouldn't GO
AWAY!!!

After about a year, a I realized that

Who is cefisorifig sathne-sex
literature ifs Surrey?

Barbara Kinley-Hubert

 

The most vocal opponents to literature
depicting same-sex parents as part of
diversity of families curriculum and the
BC Federation of Teachers’ decision to
promote tolerance of gays, lesbians and
bisexuals (GLBs) are Kari Simpson from
the Citizens Research Institute (CRI),
Surrey School Board Trustee Robert
Pickering, and Concerned Parents for
Quality Education (CPQE).

Who are these individuals and
organizations so opposed to tolerance
and equal rights for all citizens in BC?
According to James Chamberlain, Surrey
teacher, these individuals are “exactly
what we are trying to rid the school
system of, namely: threats, intimidation
tactics, name-calling and violence...
[their] actions send very scary messages
to children.”

Keri Simpson and the CRI have
sparked so much controversy that she
and her organization have taken to secret

gatherings such as the CRI’s private
“pro-family, pro-democracy” rally held
November 6, 1997, in Nanaimo. The
meeting was attended by 800 individu-
als, mostly white, middle-class local
residents. The rally was strictly control-
led by police and bodyguards, with
admittance by private invitation only.

Some of Keri Simpson's recorded
public statements during her campaign
against tolerance are the following: “the
mood of the public regarding the NDP
government is one of contempt,
frustration and civil revolkt...is it the class
of today which discusses the pros and
cons of bestiality or the mutual joys of
masturbation... It’s war. It’s war on your
rights...too many of our public school
liberals have sex on the brain...the
feminist agenda is not about equal rights
for women. It’s about a socialist, anti-
family political movement that encour-
ages women to leave their husbands, kill
their children, practice witchcraft,
destroy capitalism, and become

Cerisorship ir: Surrey

Continued from cover

sure all students are represented, I’ve
always believed we need to be treated
equally ... this motion [to remove DPAC
directors] is a waste of DPAC time and
energy and serves no purpose. In this
climate I am not allowed to represent all
the students of Surrey. Therefore, I
resign.” One of the two parents who
wanted Wilcott off the board, Nancy
Yacoub, narrowly retained her seat
because of an abstention vote. Nancy
Yacoub and Brian Jeffrey are also a part
of the organization, Parents for Quality
Education, which has links to the
Citizens Research Institute— one of the
main opposers to admitting books
depicting same-sex parents into Surrey
schools,

Diane Wilcott and another mother
involved with Heterosexuals Exposing

Paranoia, Adrian Telford, have been
nominated for an “Editor’s Choice”
award from Xtra West news publication
for their tremendous efforts in this
unsavory affair. Also up for the “Hu-"
manitarian of the Year” award are James
Chamberlain and Murray Warren, the
two gay elementary teachers who
originally introduced the three books
into their classrooms.

James Chamberlain is also active in
the Gay and Lesbian Educators of BC,
who are introducing three new resolu-
tions to the BC Teachers Federation
Annual General Meeting (AGM) this
spring. These resolutions deal with how
to eliminate homophobia and heterosex-
ism in schools and how to accomplish
zero tolerance of the harassment of gay,
lesbian, bisexual and transgender

lesbians.” ©

Robert Pickering has made such
public statements as “[the] BCTF is
driven by the homosexual agenda,” and
has even accused his own church of
having a “homosexual agenda.”

During the June 7, 1997, Anti-Gay
Rally held at Robson Square, CPQE
member Nancy Yacoub became so
enraged at counter-protesters attending
the rally that she kicked one person and
stomped on the foot of another.

If you find this kind of fanatical
politics disturbing there is something
you can do about it. Take five minutes
out of your day and call Keri Simpson
on her personal voice mail number at
the Christian Coalition of BC, 514-
0111. Let her know YOU DO NOT
APPROVE of intimidation tactics,
name-calling and violence. Tell these
people that HATRED IS NOT A
FAMILY VALUE!

students in schools. “The push from the
religious right to get their teachers to
oppose these resolutions is evident from
the fact that 19 out of 34 Surrey
delegates elected to the AGM are
Christian Fundamentalists,” Chamber-
lain said. “The religious right is already
planning to protest resolutions outside
of the AGM.”

In conclusion, it is important to note
that all legal expenses incurred by the
plaintiffs in this precedent-setting bid to
challenge censorship within our schools
are being funded privately, through
donations and fundraising events.
Meanwhile, those individuals seeking to
retain the right to ban books are relying
solely on your tax dollars to defend this
violation of human rights.

these girls were there to stay. I liked girls,
and boys. But...was something wrong
with that? I mean, wasn’t killing babies
or setting fire to nursing homes. k.d.
lang and Svend Robinson were “gay,”
and they were FAMOUS! They were just
people. People like me, who were just a
little different. Of course, I turned to
books. This time, sex ed books. The
books told me that homosexuality DID
really exist, that it was how some people
were. That people were even bisexual,
liking both. That I wasn’t some sort of
horrible freak.

Other People

14 years old. I have a small group of
friends, other “nerds” and outsiders.
Since books had told me that I was OK,
I believed that they, who liked me even
though I was weird, would think I was
OK. I decided to “come out.” So I did.
To all of them. At once. In a high school
hallway. At lunch hour. I look back, and
have to laugh. I was obviously a rookie.
They did not take it as well as I'd
hoped. True, they did not chase me
down the halls, tie me to a stake and
brand “SEXUAL DEVIANT” on my
forehead. But they still couldn't really
handle it. For them, homosexuals
WERE k.d lang and Svend Robinson.
They weren't that odd girl who you eat’
lunch and discuss Star Trek with. My
best friend looked at our close relation-

ship and wondered. My other female
friends became paranoid that I wanted
to have sex with THEM. It created a
distance between us. A distance that
contributed to the end of our friend-
ships.

In a high school, “news” of this
“magnitude” spreads quick. I wasn't ju:
a fat nerd, 1 was “A FREAKY GAY fat
nerd.” A lot of girls acted as though I
was going to molest them. A lot of gu
started to make crude jokes. A lot of
people started calling my “dyke,” “les,
“freak,” “faggot” or any other name th
thought fit. I felt alone, attacked, abu:
and alienated. And that was just the Aj

My friends made some attempts to
deal with it. Still, though, it was too
much of a shock to their systems. One
of them, possibly well-meaning, tried 1
convince me that this was just'a phase.
After all, since I hadn’t ACTUALLY hz
sex with a female, how could I KNOW
that I would like it? I asked her how
knew that she would enjoy sex with a
male. She was silent on that. The silen
pretty much continued. No one knew
what to really say to me. I didn’t know)
what I needed to hear.

By the end of the school year, I felt
like I was some sort of freak, an oddi
was still being name-called. My comi
out, along with other factors, left me
friendless. I looked forward, almost, to

the summer of isolation ahead.

 

 

2 February 11 1998 The Pink Press