4 ( November 28, 1995 ~~) What does a Jet Girl want for Christmas Peace love and sex for a jet Xmas By Dia Richardson It’s nearing exams, Christmas and the end of the year. I’m looking forward to the holiday season and the fun and debauchery that can come with it. I’d like to see this year go out with one hell of a joyous bang. Last year I got laid off from my job on December 30. I then came down with a miserable flu bug on December 31 and spent my New Year’s Eve home with my child, a fever and numerous aches and pains. Even my boyfriend was thousands of miles away having a blast at the CUP (Canadian University Press) conference. This seemed to be an omen of how my next year would be. Miserable with numerous aches and pains. I swear this holiday season is going to be different, and with any luck so will 1996. (By different I definitely mean better. I don’t want to put up with the same crap all over again.) So I have started a Christmas Wish List to make sure that I keep on track of what is really important and vital to making my holiday season ANG “al ' i arighteous one. Unlike some people, my wish list does not contain anything that can be purchased at a store. The items I want are for the most part KING) a little harder-to obtain. s 1) On the family front, I would be really impressed if (for just this one year) everyone is talking and no one is fighting. Lik 2) On the global front, I hope for peace on earth, no wars and no one blowing people up. 3) Also on the global front, I wish for happiness. Too many people find holidays depressing and spend them drunk or dead. 4) On the school front, I hope everyone is happy with their grades. 5) On the personal front, I hope to have good times with good friends and not be laid off. 6) Also on the personal front, I want to find someone special that thinks I’m special too. In other words I want sex. Earlier this year I took a vow of celibacy that was to last until New Year’s Eve. Well the new year is approaching and I’m getting horny. Life is only as good as you make it. So I hope all of you follow my example, put your noses to the grindstone, and work as hard, as possible at having one hell of a wonderful holiday season. See ya next year. The Twelve Days of Christmas By Jet Girl On the first day of Christmas a courier brought to me, a big bottle of brandy. On the second day of Christmas my dealer filled my need, with a baggy full of wicked weed. On the third day of Christmas I had a date, with a hunk who made me feel really great. On the fourth day of Christmas I didn’t answer the door, cause I was still too busy with that hunk on the floor. On the fifth day of Christmas I dashed out to buy, five Gold Coin Condoms. (by this time I was totally out). On the sixth day of Christmas I went out to Mardi Gras, to watch six peelers with some fantastic bods. On the seventh day of Christmas I played hooky, and stayed home to watch Melrose Place on TY. On the eighth day of Christmas the postman brought to me, a card from my dad stuffed full of money. \e ‘ On the ninth day of Christmas I went to the Lotus to do some dancing, : there I met a cute little blonde just right for romancing. "A Great Place to wind up On the tenth day of Christmas I partied all night, with ten friends who for group, class or staff aE akg = cartes Sag bias Oa og ; : ‘ n the elevent ayo ristmas I phoned in sick, cause I was way to Christmas Parties" hung over to face that shit. On the twelfth day of Christmas I visited a friend, and my $ift to him was i some awesome head. Cal | Now fo rR eservations On the thirteenth day of Christmas I went to the gym, and tried to work off my twelve days of sin. C20NE ng aeeny “res Marine Cold Beer and Wine Store Give the Holiday Gift That’s Always INCLUDES: JUICES - FRUIT & VEGETABLE MINERAL WATER & SOFT DRINKS PIZZA, VARIETY OF SANDWICHES 24 HOUR SERVICE Oi or = Phone: 524-9788 Fax: 524-4983