THE OTHER PRESS The Other Press Published since 1976 Room 1020 — 700 Royal Avenue, New Westminster, BC V3L 5B2 Telephone: 604.525.3542 Fax: 604.525.3505 Managing Editor Colin “The Rocket” Miley othereditor @ yahoo.ca News Editor Nicole “The French Connection” Burton nicolemarieburton @ yahoo.com Opinions Editor Brandon “Boom Boom” Ferguson opinionsubmit @ hotmail.com Arts & Entertainment Editor lain “Night Train” W. Reeve aeditor @ gmail.com Features Editor Kevin “Gump” Welsh krwelsh @canada.com Interim Sports Editor Brian “Tiger” McLennon Proofreader Millie “The Mascott” Strom Graphics The Hammer Blattmann boomboomdarkroom @ yahoo.ca Layout Turk Hargreaves saraharmerstolemystereo @ yahoo.com Photography Kat “Penalty Box” Code Web/I.T. Eddie “Lucky Pierre” Keech other_press @shaw.ca Distribution Manager Derek “The Waterboy” Ungless Office Manager J.J. “Knuckles” McCullough wart_mamu @yahoo.com Accountant Alyona “Upstairs” Luganskaya tradexlic @ hotmail.com Columnists Amanda “Passes” Aikman, J.J. “Shoots” McCullough, lain “Scores” Reeve Illustrator J.J. “Hot-Dog Vendor” McCullough wart_mamu @ yahoo.com External Relations “Cyclone” Kerry Evans kerryevans @ shaw.ca Contributors Jason “Knuckles” Chan, Brady “Dr. Dunkenstein” Ehler, Joel “The Mailman” Koette, Kevin “Cujo” Lalonde, Brent “Madman” Morley, Dave “Goalsuck” Pearcey, Steph “The Flower’ Smith, Julian “The Roadrunner” Worker, Vince “Cement Head” Yim The Other Press is Douglas College's autonomous student newspaper. The Other Press is run by a collective and is published weekly during the fall and winter semesters, and monthly (as a magazine) dur- ing the summer. We receive our funding from a student levy collected every semester at registration, and from local and national advertising revenue. The Other Press is a member of the Canadian University Press (CUP), a cooperative of stu- dent newspapers from across Canada. We adhere to CUP’s Statement of Common Principles and Code of Ethics—except when it suits us not to. The Other Press reserves the right to choose what to publish, and will not publish material that is racist, sexist, or homophobic. Submissions may be edited for clarity and brevity if necessary. All images are copyright to their respective owners. October 5, 2005 The following letter has not been edited in any way. Simple Hero has a right to roll me, light me, and smoke me for my editorial decisions in and around the wildly popular “Other Press Sex Issue,” and he has a right to do it in his own words. Dear Colin, I write in response to the Other Press Sex Issue of Sept. 28th, a theme which can hardly be considered appropriate for a reader- ship of College Students that certainly includes 17 year old women only months removed from their high school graduation. I admit that at 21 years of age, I feel part of the mature student crowd at Coquitlam’s Douglas Lam campus, and would not be offeded by the material were it not anchored by the very witty and sexual intellectual, your own little Dan Savage, "Humpy Humperson." In its brutal honesty, the piece salvages the entire issue. I would first like to comment on the news editor’s pathetic advice titled "Ten Tips for the fellas." I am sure she was only playing along to the theme, pressured by a male dominated staff, and phony, attention wanting ’editors’ at the Other Press. Not to get personal, but its clear the poor author is afraid to take the plunge and indite the real offenders here, the men of her past. As a male, and student of Douglas College, I am offended by the assumption that all men suck at sex, and are automatically programmed to attack the female body like a porn star. In fact, if its worth two cents, the first time I ever made love was like poetry, lead through all acts(as is often the case) by the girl. SUBMISSION GUIDELINES The weekly deadline for submissions is Wednesday for publication the following Wednesday. Letters to the Editor, vacant sec- tions, and “time-sensitive” articles (weekend news, sports, and cultural reviews) will be accepted until Saturday noon and can be sub- mitted to the editor at: othereditor@yahoo.ca All other submissions should be forward- ed to the appropriate section editor. Please include your name, phone number/email address, and word count, and submit via email as an MS Word.doc attachment to the attention of the appropriate editor. The Other Press is run by a collective, which means all decisions are reached via a democratic voting process. Membership in the voting collective is open to any person who has contributed to at least two of three consecutive issues. Those interested in join- ing the Other Press collective should contact the editor at othereditor@yahoo.ca News opnewseditor@ gmail.com Opinions opinionsubmit@ hotmail.com A&E aeditor@ gmail.com Features krwelsh @canada.com Sports othereditor@yahoo.ca I certainly imagine the Other Press office as a furnace of pseudo intellectuals, burning their wits end through fattys of BC Bud, smirking at their controversial accomplishments so early in the year, not at all wondering why at the age of 27 they are still stalk- ing the grounds of a entry level college. I eagerly await your next issue, perhaps another theme issue, maybe this time about drugs and rock’nroll? Sincerly, Your friendly neighbourhood Simple Hero Dear Simple Hero (if that is indeed your real pseudonym), Where to start? I swear, if you didn’t already write that let- ter, I would have paid you to. Rebuking your arguments is easier than getting laid on Uncle’s Day at a whorehouse. So, ring the bell, SH, class is now in session. Pil answer your silly allegations and inane ramblings in order: 1) We did that issue especially because there are 17- year-old girls at Douglas. Oh, wait, no we didn’t. We put a restricted cat and the words “limited admittance if under 18” on the cover. But FYI, some 17-year-old girls get laid too. 2) If, at 21, you’re feeling part of “the mature crowd at Douglas,” open your eyes ya dummy, you’re a freaking baby. Why don’t you go play with your Hot Wheels and let the grown ups become nurses, writers, and otherwise professional. 3) You like Brandon Ferguson’s writing? Well, you got me there. I like it too. 4) The News Editor is Nicole Burton. The person who contributed “Ten Tips for The Fellas” was Angelina Fabbro. What are you, high? Otherwise, you’re right. Angelina only shares sex information in a helpful and witty manner after she’s goaded into it by “a male-dominated staff, and phony, attention-wanting editors.” Notice how I inserted hyphens between your compound adjectives and managed to keep your emphasis on the word “edi- tors,” while avoiding the dreaded “quadruple quo tation mark” when I quoted you? Not that I know anything about editing the English language or anything. 5) Like I said, fish in a barrel. But I will say this in return to your slight towards Douglas College, call ing it “an entry-level college.” Post-secondary edu- cation, whether it’s Harvard or Douglas College, isn’t just about getting a job. It’s about making one’s head a bit more interesting place to live. Knowledge is the décor; your head is the house. Your life-path is like a...okay, wait. Who am I kid ding? College is about getting laid. Thus, the OP Sex Issue. I'd understand if you had legitimate beefs about that issue, SH. It wasn’t for the weak of spirit or faint of heart. But, if you’re going to take us to task, you may want to bring your A-game. Verbal beat-downs are just the pre-game warm-up around here. Thanks for writing. Yours in perpetuity, Colin Miley, Managing Editor, The Other Press. OP 4 Life. PS-If anyone has ideas for future themes, please forward them to othereditor@yahoo.ca. We’re actually really nice here at The Other Press. Mostly.