By Laurel Borrowman,
Life & Style Editor

ovember: it’s a good month
N= be single. I don’t even

need a fully-fingered hand
to count how many exceptions I can

time, commitment, diligence, and
careful grooming.

My other qualm is the guys
out there who use this opportunity
to grow the most obnoxious
moustache possible. I’m all about
freedom of facial hair, so power to

“I'm all about freedom of facial hair, so power to you boys. | just
feel that when I’d like to punch a fellow in the face before he’s even
spoken, Movember might be giving moustaches a bit of a bad rep.”

make to my Movember feelings.
To everyone else, I appreciate your
commitment to raising money (if
you are) and/or awareness for
prostate cancer, but the moustache
you've been growing this month
is pretty gross. Charity aside,
Movember is pretty gross.

I’m not even a moustache
hater in general. On the right face,
the man and the ‘stache form a
synergistic, symbiotic relationship,
enhancing a dude’s entire persona.
It just seems to me that in the time
allotted for Movember, one can
only grow a moustache to a certain
calibre. True moustache glory takes

you boys. I just feel that when I’d
like to punch a fellow in the face
before he’s even spoken, Movember
might be giving moustaches a bit of
a bad rep.

So as we near the end of the
month, and as the facial hair is
nearing critical mass for many, I’d
like to remedy the problem with
a reminder of some true works of
art in the upper lip department.
Moustaches that don’t just happen
overnight. Moustaches that require
precision, attention, and care on a
regular basis. Moustaches that rule.
I give you three.

Life&Style.

Another article about moustaches in November

The Fancy

Ah, such a classic. Plus, to
keep it in perfect form, you'll need
to keep a little pot of moustache
wax on hand; how much more
intelligent can you look than
when smoothing out those twirly
ends between your thumb and
forefinger? Not much. Proof,
just check out Daniel Day Lewis.
His moustache even has its own
Facebook page. 637 Likes? Nice.

The Bars

a 7

Not to be mistaken for The
Handlebar (*cringe), I like to
think of The Bars as the daytime
version of The Fancy. It needs a
little less upkeep during the day,
so once you've grown the proper
foundation, you can pretty much

just set it and forget it and look

like one dapper dude. A celebrity
comparison is difficult, but if you
think Tom Selleck circa Magnum,
PI. (Google it, you youngsters!)
and tailor it just a tad, you’re on the
right track. Golden.

The Dali

Maybe it’s a bit cliché of me
to throw this in, but come on. It’s
effing Dali. Not only is his legacy
transcending generations via crazy
surrealistic art, but his moustache
has materialized the image of his
face in our brains forever. The Dali
is the epitome of bat-shit crazy,
and anyone who can pull this off
deserves a massive pat on the back
for having guts, commitment, and
probably also some gravity-defying
powers.

 

Christmas crafting

Handmade U-Pass holders pass the gift-giving test!

By Sharon Miki, Assistant Editor

say—there’s no better way to

show people you care than with
a nifty holiday gifty. Because most
college students are perpetually
strapped for cash (maybe not
Dakota Fanning or the actress
from Harry Potter, but a lot of us),
I thought I’d come up with some
nice, inexpensive, and useful
handmade gift ideas. At the same
time, since I’m constantly nearly-
losing my U-Pass in the depths of
my pockets/ my bag, I could really
use a snazzy U-Pass case for easy
finding and to up my coolness
factor. Eureka! I give you the

[= care what you Grinches

 

Ubiquitous U-Pass Holder.

What you'll need:

No matter how you dress it up,
you'll need a base to make these
babies durable. I used the little
plastic sleeves that used to come
with my 1-Zone bus passes. If you
don’t have any leftover, I bet you
could con one from a clerk at the
7-Eleven.

Once you have a base, you
need some supplies to dress it up.
I used scrap fabrics and felt (it’s a
pretty tiny size, after all), but you
could also cut up an old T-shirt or
something.

Finally, you need a way to
attach things to other things.

Because I’m extremely lazy, I’m
using glue (super, though I imagine
a hot glue gun would suffice just as
well), Velcro (the stick on kind from
the dollar store—I said I was lazy,
right?), and a needle and thread.

How-to:
First, prep your base fabric by
tracing the shape of the plastic
sleeve and cutting out two pieces of
fabric that are just a little bit wider;
make one piece about a centimetre
longer (it will serve as a flap).
Next, slather the sleeve with
your glue of choice and then
carefully cover with your fabulous
fabric squares. For added charm,

consider hand sewing the edges
(except the edge where the flap is—
you have to be able to get your pass
in and out) for a nice finish.

Finally, affix a piece of Velcro
to the flap and to the base, so that
when the flap is folded over the
Velcro will connect.

Once you've prepared a rad
case, glitz it up to the degree that
you think your friend, lover, or
family member will appreciate.

The last step? Wrap that sucker
in a scintillating new copy of The
Other Press, tie it all together with a
bow, and prepare to be adored for
your kind-hearted generosity and
extreme artistic ability.

 

   

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