Reviews

 

Peebles’ at it again. This movie isn’t

even good in the commercials. Who
ould honestly take a man with such a round
ead seriously in a role that is really difficult
p pass off successfully, or should I say
elievebly?

Hollywood cliché #5625: A man/machine
art should always be played by a figure who
5 chisled, or machine-like, from top to
ottom. Peeble’s body was in fabulous form,
ut his head is umm... too sweet (If you don’t
nderstand my point, think Terminator.
here’s a good machine’s face). In my
pinion, Peebles is not our man for this part.
His ‘Solo talk’ wasn’t consistent, and when he
as injured, his movements were just plain
umb. I don’t think the screenplay was fine-
ned enough, half the time Solo seemed to be

E) h No... Solo. What can I say, Feeble

 
   
 

S (ORCC)

eview by Sapphire

a machine with a touch of human-ness, while
the rest of the time, he was a bad actor with a
whole lot of Mr. Rogers inside. In the words
of that irritating dance tune, “Please Don’t
Go”... The story line is so trying, and
PAINFUL, most of the hour and a half was
completely predictable, including the
‘terminator like’ bad guy at the end (you
know, those guys with machine gun arms?)

This flick is too long. I have never, ever,
wanted to run screaming from a theatre
before (it always sounded so cliché to me),
but now I really know what that feeling is
like, If I had driven that night, I would’ve
been outta there, lick-a-tee split.
Unfortunately, I went with someone who,
after looking at his watch at three different
times during the show, was still convinced it
may get better.

 

his movie starts out great. Perhaps the most original,
eye catching, engrossing opening to a movie I have
ever seen.
Then the titles end.
After that, it’s all downhill. Ironic, in a movie about the
egression of the human spirit back to animalism. Adapted
om H.G. Well’s potboiler, this movie tries painfully hard to
e relevant to modern society. The trouble is, it’s not. Or
Ather, it struggles to make a point that has been made a
ousand times before, and a thousand times better.
H.G. Wells is not to blame for this. Not directly. His novel,
ke Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein, decries the evil within
an’s breast, and the danger of science. He helped build a
le and a tradition that continues to this very day.
And therein lies the problem. So many copies have been
ade of this story, so many variations have been played on
his theme that the original seems...bland. Gothic, or gothic-
e horror rarely works these days, at least on an audience
der than 12. R. L: Stine is more relevant, and at least he’s
ming for the right demographics.
The movie relies too much on makeup and not enough on
spense to carry the viewer over the basic plot
consistencies. There is no reason given as to why the half
luman, half animal creatures are regressing, only that a magic
will slow the rate down. And I don’t even want to think
bout the science behind the concept of gene-manipulation
sed in this movie. Perhaps when science was young and
nknown people could buy such shameless lack of technical
ow-how, but the world is older, more cynical. Science is not

 

It didn’t, it’s a big bomb, stick a wick in
Peebles’ head and light that fuse.

of Dr.

 

Moreau

as mysterious as it used to be, and you can’t pull the
epistemological wool over the movie goer’s eyes as
easy as you used to.

Val Kilmer does an admirable Brad Pitt imitation
here, in true 12 Monkeys fashion. But at least
Kilmer survives on-screen longer than Marlon
Brando, who bites it (or rather, gets it bitten for
him) just over half way through the movie. It’s a sad
state of affairs when both big name actors are dead
half an hour before the movie ends. (And hey look!
Ron Perlman, hidden behind a disfigured
mask...again! Does anyone out there actually know
what he /ooks like?)

There are some good laughs in this movie—some
intentional and some not. The fight on the life raft
raised a few titters, and Marlon Brando’s smallest
“son” is deliberately amusing (he plays a slower,
quieter Salicious Crumb, if you would, to Brando’s
philanthropic Jabba). The heartfelt guffaws at the
closing soapbox speech on “I have seen the beast
and it is man,” were not. Nor, I suppose was the
musical reference to Python’s Oliver Cromwell
intentional, though I couldn’t stop myself from the
occasional drunken “SEPtember.”

But even laughing at the movie isn’t enough to
alleviate the inherent pain of watching it. Maybe ten
years ago when I was younger and less wise this
movie might have scared me. Or interested me. But
schlock gothic horror just doesn’t yank my crank
anymore.

 

 

 

 

FENLE
A Deivan cd Be Atboaey

Exclusive Numeric
Pager Offer

Douglas College Students And Staff
&

Never miss a call again

Ut,

~

ay
e All Inclusive Price for Douglas College!!
ONLY $ 14.95 per month

For your convenience FREE delivery
anywhere...anytime!

CALL NOW
Giselle Ennis @ 669-8816
or

Page Me@ 844-8167
Order by September 15/96 and your Ist month is FREE

 

 

The Other Press September 3' 1996 ° 11°