issue 09 / volume 41

Cheating 101

» Dealing with infidelity

Brittney MacDonald
@& Life & Style Editor

B Mlifeandstyle
@theotherpress.ca

 

ealing with infidelity can

be extremely difficult,
especially because it’s very
personal and you can’t always
discuss it with those closest to
you and expect to receive an
unbiased answer.

Going to your friends
or family for advice can be
problematic, mostly because
they think the best of you and
in their opinion anyone who
cheats on you isn’t worthy of
your attention. Though this
may be true ina lot of cases, I
think dealing with infidelity is
something that a couple can’t
generalize, mostly because
such complicated emotions are
involved.

Most often infidelity isn’t
the full issue unto itself, it’s a
symptom of other issues. For

: me, I’ve been cheated on three

: times in my illustrious and

: limited dating career. The worst
: of them was because when it

: came down to it, my boyfriend

: at the time just didn’t respect me :
: as an individual. He expected me :
: to be like all the girlfriends he

: had had before, and constantly

: compared me to them. In the

: end it wasn't the cheating that

: broke us up, but his nagging

: and constant criticism. Another
: time, my boyfriend cheated

: because he said he didn’t feel

: emotionally fulfilled within our

: relationship. His saying so made
: me realize I wasn’t either, and

: Icame to the conclusion that

: we both needed very different

: things from our partners.

The reason I’m saying all

this isn’t to bond over cheating

: men, but to point out that

: different scenarios are the result
: of different issues.

To prevent any issue

of infidelity from forming
: I believe it’s important to

: establish boundaries very early
: in the relationship. I’m not

: an extremely jealous person,

: but I expect my significant

: other to follow the same rules

they have set down for me.
Previously I have been in open

: relationships, where we were
: free to see or hook up with other :
: people, and that worked for

: us for the most part, because

: we had set the boundary that

: we were together, and that no

: longterm relationship would

: form out of these other flings.

: Currently I’m in a monogamous
: relationship, and that works also
: because I know that I can trust

: him just as much as he trusts

: me. Setting ground rules over

: what constitutes as cheating

: will prevent confusion later on.

: I mean, what if you consider a

: kiss to be unfaithful, while your

: partner does not?

For couples dealing

with multiple sexualities,
: further ground rules need to
: be established. If you have

: a bisexual or pansexual/

: omnisexual partner, do you

: consider them forming sexual
: relationships with the same

: gender asa breach of your

: relationship, or are you okay

: with that as long as it’s nota

: romantic relationship?

Discussing these things

: beforehand will keep your :
: partner informed as to what you :
: expect of them. But of course,
: these discussions don't always
: happen, so what do you do in
: the wake of the deed?

I think as an individual you

need to determine fault. Never

: blame the person outside of

: your relationship, no matter

: how tempting that might be.

: It’s always easier to blame the

: outside party because you have
: no real emotional attachment

: tothem, but they’re not the one
: who made the commitment to

: you. Though I’ve never been the
: “other woman,’ I have friends

: who have been. It’s not their

: fault your partner cheated, just

life & style // 17

: like it’s not their fault if you

: continue to let your significant
: other be unfaithful to you

: without repercussions.

You also need to establish

whether or not you can move

: on from this. I have forgiven

: people for cheating on me and
: moved on with the relationship
: without much issue. Our

eventual breakups were the

: result of other matters. But

: there is one case where the

: cheating occurred with my best
: friend at the time, and though

: I tried to move on from that

: [just couldn't because it was

: sucha large breach of trust. You
: need to determine for yourself

: how forgiving you will be, if

: forgiveness is possible at all. But
: don’t just be a doormat either.

: Ifthe infidelity is recurring you
: might want to think about how
: much your lover respects you if
: they continue to disregard your
: feelings or commitment to each
: other.

 

 

Image from Forbes.com

Apple's latest announcements

» A partnership with HBO Now, the newest MacBook Air, and the

Apple Watch

Jerrison Oracion
Senior Columnist

n Apple’s announcement last

fall, they showed the highly
anticipated Apple Watch, to
high praise. However, they
did not say when it would be
released or how much it would
cost. On March 9, in the same
theatre in San Francisco, Apple
announced the release date and
estimated price of their new
product.

The announcement began
with the CEO of Apple, Tim
Cook, giving an update on
Apple stores and how successful
they are in China. Next, the
CEO of HBO, Richard Plepler,
announced a new streaming
service called HBO Now, which
will be available next month
for Apple TV, iPad, iPhone,

: and iPod Touch, with a one-

: month free trial just in time

: for the highly anticipated new
: season of Game of Thrones.

: Jeff Williams talked about

: how important the iPhone is

: in medical research and how

: anew software development

: program called ResearchKit

: produces high-quality studies.

The announcement got

: more exciting when Cook

: announced the next version of
: the Macbook which reinvents

: the laptop. According to

: Phillip Schiller, the new

: version of the Macbook is the

: thinnest and lightest Macbook
: ever—even thinner than the

: Macbook Air. Some of the

: new features include a more

: precise keyboard that has a

: new trackpad that uses force

: to click something, a specially

: designed battery that has all-

: day battery life, and a new port
: called USB-C, which is a port

: that combines all of the ports

: that are in a laptop in one port.

: USB-C cables can be inserted in
: any way.

There are three versions

: of Apple Watch. Apple Watch
: Sport is made with aluminum,
: has a 38mm dial and will cost

: $349. The standard Apple

: Watch is made with steel and

: will be available in 38mm or

: 42mm dial sizes. The price on
: the standard Apple Watch will
: vary depending on the size

: and combination of band and
: casing you choose. The limited
: edition Apple Watch is made

: with 18K gold and is estimated
: to cost $10,000. Apple Watch

: will be available on April 24.

wW) #DOUGLIFE

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