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And more!

Dreamwork’s next
10 movie pitches

> From the creative minds that brought you some pretty fucked-up movies if we’re being honest

Rebecca Peterson
Humour Editor

 

reamworks Animation studios

held a press conference this past
weekend, rolling out their new line-up
of possible productions for the public to
review and approve. These 10 potential
films are said to reflect the “style and
values” of Dreamworks, with emphasis on
imagination and fun for the whole family.

The Grundles

This film follows a family of strange,
mascot-type creatures living in sewage
drains across America! The storyline

may be lacking, but the movie is sure

to bring out the laughs, however cheap,

as the Grundles get into all sorts of wild
shenanigans! (The trailer is said to feature
the song “Get Low” by Lil Jon, who will

be voicing one of the titular Grundles.)

Happy Hats

Have you ever wondered what your

hats get up to when they're not on your
head? Dreamworks has! It’s said this film
will also reflect topical issues such as
racism, poverty, and terminal illness.

SkyTrains!

Set in the small Canadian town of
Vancouver, SkyTrains! follows the musical
story of the young Evergreen Line, as

she tries to measure up to her older
brother and sister, Expo and Millenium.
A wonderful coming-of-age story
exploring the dynamics of sibling rivalry.

SARAH , AG

LOOKING 4 SUM A
‘Oo HOLD MY viBRATOR.

® © @O

 

My Life as an Amoeba

An amoeba and a young boy switch lives
for a day, kicking off a touching story
about the value of learning to see the
world from different perspectives.

off. A cautionary tale for children,
sure to terrify and traumatize!

of not being seen.

Talking Animals: The Musical!

Self-explanatory. Starring three famous
pop singers who have never voice-acted
in their lives, and Alan Tudyk, probably.

Where’s Waldo 3-D
Cashing in on the nostalgia of ’90s
children, Where’s Waldo will provide
much-needed backstory for the red-
and-white striped character we've

all learned to
hunt over the
years. This movie
is sure to teach
young children
the importance

Fruit Have Feelings Too

A heartwarming story written to
teach children empathy, following
the adventure of one apple searching
for the tree it fell from. Backed up by
an incredible cornucopia of co-stars,
this film is sure to bring a few tears to
even the crabbiest of apple's eyes.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
  
  

Humourous

A lazy humour editor learns
the errors of her ways and
turns from cheap jokes to
well thought-out humour
that’s both intelligent

and thought-provoking.

A silent short film.

Sassy Toddlers
These Sassy Toddlers sure are
a handful! But can they take
down the evil forces of Kim
Jong Un and avert a
nuclear holocaust???

The Thumbsnipper
Based off a German
fairy tale, The
Thumbsnipper follows
little Conrad Suck-a-
Thumb as he tries to escape the
sharp shears of the wicked tailor
who's come to cut his thumbs

Illustration by Ed Appleby

 

 

TERESA, 35

So. THERE'S THESE
PIMPLES ... ON MY BACK

® © @O