By Jacey. Gibb

h, I love the smell of freshmen
A the morning. Say goodbye to

the sweet sensations of summer
and say hello to nine months of overcast.
At the risk of being tarred and feathered
here, I'll admit that I’ve been looking
forward to going back to school for quite
some time now. I know it’ll only take'a
week before I’m counting down the days
to the end of semester but heading in this
fall, I feel great. A large amount of this
peppy no-fear attitude probably stems
from how comfortable I’ve become around
the college. Though I only have one year
of Douglas under my belt, I am actually
entering my final year here too. As a going
away present to you doe-eyed freshmen,
I’m here to offer you all the exclusive sage
advice only a man with a beard could give
you.

Do: Rent a locker from the Douglas
Students’ Union (DSU) - The great thing
about lockers is that they’re not just for
storing your moldy sandwiches and pictures
of your high school sweetheart. These guys
especially come in handy if you’re taking
four or five courses and aren’t overly eager
to carry your ball and chain of a book bag
around with you. Best of all: they only

cost ten bucks for the whole semester! So
pluck a crisp John A. from your beer fund
and head over to the DSU to reserve some
locker real estate. Better hurry though, as
the top lockers usually go fast.

Do: Research your professors on www.
ratemyprofessors.com - Call me superficial,
call me judgemental, but I call it smart. In
my first semester at Douglas I dove faith-
first into registration and wound up with a
few lemons for instructors. As shallow as it
sounds, the site is pretty accurate and offers
feedback from students for students. Of
course, you shouldn’t treat it like your bible
but having a cheat sheet doesn’t hurt.

Do: Forward your school email to your

~ regular email - Twitter, Facebook, Gmail.

The fewer social media accounts you have
to worry about checking, the better. That’s
why your myDouglas can be set up ina
way that it forwards all your school stuff
to the email you aciually check. It may
seem like small potatoes but I guarantee
at least once in your academic career you
will show up to a class only to discover
that your professor sent an email out a few
hours beforehand cancelling class because
terrorists kidnapped his daughter. Well, you
get the idea.

Do: Find out where all the computer labs
are - You’ll find there are times you can
walk into the library and have your pick of
the litter when it comes to computers, but
you'll very soon realize that those times
are a rarity. Often, unoccupied computers _
are rarer than a Smarties McFlurry in the
Sahara, so it’s good to know where the
computer labs are for when you’re in a rush

‘to print out that assignment that was due ten

minutes ago. As well, there are a couple of
classrooms littered around campus that have
computers ripe for the picking, but those
gems are up to you to find.

Do: Take a Student Success course - An
academic advisor convinced me to take one
of these courses and it has probably been -
the most useful class I’ve taken so far. Some

_ of the things you go over may seem kind of

elementary (let’s make goal spread sheets!)
but there’s a lot of invaluable stuff lurking
in the curriculum like how to properly
write research papers and how to tell what
from those seven pages of notes your took
will actually be on the exam. The course
isn’t necessarily transferable, but some
institutions will honour the credits.

Do: Get involved around campus - While
Douglas may not be the bustling social
beehive you hoped it would be you can

 

still make the best of it. There are a couple
student clubs kicking around and there are a
few flagships like the school’s sports teams,
leadership program and of course, The
Other Press. The DSU is also always open
to new club ideas so if you head over to
their website, you can look into how to set —
up your own Tina Fey appreciation/crochet
club.

Don’t: Live off primarily cafeteria food -
One of the easiest and also worst traps to
fall into is the réliance that manifests on the
munchies on campus. I could zero in on the
obvious health defects offered by the deep
fryer but health and nutrition lessons were
your mom’s responsibility so I’ll just bring
up the financial perspective. The average
meal from the caf falls around seven or
eight dollars and even the low range snacks
can add up when they become a habit.
Brown paper bagging your lunch will give
you more control over what you shove in
your piehole and will also help your budget
stretch a bit further. aie

Don’t: Enroll in a night class - I know
what you’re thinking. “Night class doesn’t
look so bad. I can take one of them instead
of one of the early morning ones and then
I'll be able to sleep in.” Honestly, night
classes need to have a warning label on
them. It means that on that particular night,
every week for the next four months, you
technically have plans. I guess some people
might not be-as outraged by this social
calendar consumption as I am, but to me it
means missing out on concerts and karaoke
nights. If it’s at all possible, try and cram
that course into an earlier slot. _

Don’t: Just stop going to a class -

«Something else your mothers should have

taught you, but important enough for me
to mention again. If you decide after two
weeks that Animal Psychology maybe isn’t
your thing, make sure you officially drop
the course. Otherwise you’ll get stuck with

 

(Peart

Find a professor Find

+ Search for a pi

—

Linited States

a UN on your transcripts, which is about
as attractive as a tramp stamp at a Mormon
family reunion.

Don’t: Rush making friends in your classes
- Okay, so you made it through orientation
with minimal battle wounds but now the
people you latched onto for the day are
nowhere to be seen on campus. While I still
encourage you to be friendly on your first
day, diving into a classroom comradery
with someone just because they sat next to
you can backfire on so many levels. You
might not be able to shake them if they do a
complete 180 on you and turn all Swimfan,
so slow down tiger and obey the three day
tule like the rest of us before adding them
on Facebook.

Don’t: Let pop culture expectations dampen
reality’s results - I’m blaming Hollywood
for this one, as countless individuals flood
into post-secondary with the misconceived
conception that it’s a 24 hour beer-soaked
orgy. Remember that this is Douglas
College, not Animal House. Of course
you’re going to be able to add a few wacky
notches to your party bedpost, but you’ll
find Douglas to have more of a high school
feel than of an American Pie movie. Just
remember to keep your expectations around
sea level and start working on your UBC
application like the rest of us.

Alright, that’s it! I’m done: No more
beardly advice for you rookie. The further
you get into the school year, the more you'll
realize how unwarranted your concerns
were in the first place. Some things about
college won’t live up to the hype while
other things will surpass your every 3

- expectation. So for now, sit back and relax

and let me be one of the first to welcome
you to Douglas College.

n